


Instinct

by NoelEnough



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grand Theft Auto Setting, F/M, Fake AH Crew, Female Jack, Fluff and Smut, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Mildly Dubious Consent, Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Past Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Rough Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-24
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-03-23 07:36:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 22
Words: 76,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13782843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoelEnough/pseuds/NoelEnough
Summary: The new kid to the Fake AH Crew is starting to fit in, for the most part. Vagabond seems to be distancing himself from Sweetpea, their new data analyst and information gatherer. When Geoff literally traps her in a room with the notorious hitman it all ends better than expected, but will it stay that way? From vengeful ex-lovers to skittish new ones, Brie has to relearn how to work as a part of a crew while she tries to keep her past where it belongs.





	1. Stuck in Here with Me

          I had my headphones in as I stared at the computers in front of me as data whizzed by faster than I could read it. I had been working for the Fake AH Crew for about a month now and was finally getting the hang of how they wanted their data processed.

          I was also getting the hang of the Fakes. At first, Geoff and Jack were the only ones who made their way to my little corner of the hangout. They would sit with me and talk me through how they operated and what they were looking for when they received an info dump.

          I had worked as a private contractor who dealt information to the crews of Los Santos. For years I bought and sold info to the highest bidder. When Geoff approached me and offered me a position, I was hesitant. I was afraid that all my connections would dissolve once I was working under one crew, but it was quite the contrary. Turns out, a lot of people trust the Fakes.

          After joining, the other members slowly trickled in. Usually just to come in and kill time, but sometimes they sat on the couch behind me and chatted for a few hours while I worked. I had known about each member through info I had collected but getting to know them personally was great. Being the computer nerd, I never really had friends, so this was a nice change of pace.

          Vagabond, or Ryan as the crew called him, was the only one who didn’t stop in. The closest I had come to him was once I was sitting in the common area and he sat next to me. I guessed that he just didn’t want to waste time with me.

          So when Geoff literally pushed him into my office, I naturally raised my eyebrows and pulled out a headphone.

          “Look,” Ryan huffed. “She’s working. I don’t need to be in here.”

          “She’s processing information,” Geoff snapped back after looking at my screens. “She’s about to put her feet up and play a game while it finishes.”

          I shrugged and nodded. He was right, there wasn’t a lot to do while the data decrypted so I usually just played a simple game I could put down and pick up quickly.

          “I still don’t want to distract her,” the younger man said and tried to push past Geoff.

          “Nonsense,” his Boss laughed. “She enjoys the company.”

          “If he doesn’t want to be here, he doesn’t have to,” I chimed in. Ryan gestured at me as if to say ‘See!?”

          “This isn’t up for debate. He’s staying. It’s about time he stops avoiding you,” Geoff said and turned to leave.

Ryan and I both objected as he closed the door behind him. I heard the door lock and furrowed my brows. Ryan tried turning the knob and unlocking it from the inside, but it didn’t budge.

“That’s a fire hazard!” I shouted as Ryan let his head fall against the door with a thud.

“Just don’t let anything catch fire!” Geoff yelled back.

“May as well make yourself comfortable,” I muttered and motioned towards the couch.

He sighed heavily and flopped onto the couch as I loaded up Stardew Valley. We sat in silence for a while, the only other sounds in the room were my button clicks and the music playing from my headphones. After almost fifteen minutes, I glanced at him. He was laid out on the couch, eyes closed and chest slowly rising and falling.

I turned back to my computer and continued to arrange and organize files. This was a particularly large one and it was going to take a long time. I turned back to the dozing man behind me.

He had propped his head up on his leather jacket and had his hands folded across his chest. His black shirt was tight across his body and only grew tighter when he inhaled. While his jeans weren’t form fitting like Gavin’s, everything from the knee up was very defined by the dark denim.

“Shouldn’t you be harvesting something?” he yawned and pulled me out of my observations. He was watching me from under his eyelids and I blushed at being caught staring.

“Sorry,” I mumbled and turned back to my game.

After an hour, I got up and was trying the door for anything that possibly led to opening it.

“Geoff!” I shouted and beat on the door. “We’re best friends now. Can I please go pee?”

          Ryan chuckled from the couch as I heard Geoff approach the door.

          “Besties huh?” he asked through the barrier. “What’s his middle name?”

          I looked to the man on the couch for a hint.

          “Ryan,” I answered as I read his lips.

          “First name?”

          “James?” I responded slowly, having problems reading the word from his lips. Instead of reading them, found myself focusing on how they looked as they moved.

          “You hesitated,” Geoff said, calling my bluff.

          “Can I still pee?”

          The door jiggled and opened. I didn’t even get a clear look at Geoff before I took off down the hallway. I intentionally took awhile as I washed my hands and grabbed some snacks and a drink.

          “How’s work going?” Geoff asked as I pulled a bag of cherries out of the refrigerator.

          “Slowly,” I sighed. “But it’ll all be ready by tomorrow.”

          “Good. How’s Ryan?” he pried.

          “Quiet,” I said simply. If I said ‘sleeping’ he’d probably lock the door again.

          “Have you tried talking to him?”

          “No, not really.”  
          

“Why not?”

          “Because he doesn’t want to talk Geoff,” I sighed as I made my way back to the room.

          “I’m gonna let you in on something,” Geoff whispered as he grabbed my arm to stop me.

          “He’s been purposely avoiding you. We don’t know why, but I’ve got money riding on it being because he wants to fuck you.”

          “Geoffrey,” I snapped and pulled my arm away. “You’re locking him in a room with me just to try and get him to fuck me?”

          “Not _just_ so he’ll fuck you,” the tattooed man corrected. “To see what happens. Jack says it’s just a crush kinda thing and nothing will happen.”

          “So you’re waiting to see whether or _not_ he fucks me?”

          “Could be worse,” Geoff shrugged. “Gavin went left field and says he actually wants to kill you.”

          I rolled my eyes heavily and huffed. I should have known it was more than Geoff trying to socialize his hitman, but now that I know that he has been trying to stay away, I needed to know why too.

          I was surprised to see that Ryan was still on the couch when I entered. I raised my eyebrows as I sat back down.

          “I’m comfy,” he shrugged.

          “So you won’t mind staying in here until the heist tonight?” Geoff asked, already closing the door anyway.

          “This just means I’ll be real antsy,” Ryan responded as I heard the lock slide into place.

          “When’s the heist?” I questioned as I set up the next round of decryption and analysis.

          “Gotta leave here around seven I think,” he muttered and I glanced at the clock. Quarter past five. I had about an hour to see if I could get anything out of him. Maybe if I could, I could place a bet in the Fakes pool with some insider knowledge. I let about forty-five minutes pass in comfortable silence before I struck up conversation.

          “So what’s the plan for tonight?” I asked.

          “Rob a bank,” he said shortly. “Easy shit. Geoff wants to try some new doodad that he found.”

          “Sounds fun,” I chirped. I had never taken part in a heist physically, so it honestly did sound like fun.

          “Eh,” he shrugged and sat up. “Fun is anything involving explosions and high-speed chases.”

          “Not enough danger for you?” I questioned and shot him a teasing glance.

          “Not nearly enough to get my heart pumping,” he chuckled. I had never heard him laugh like that before and honestly, it gave me goosebumps.

          “Take a lot to get your heart going?” I pressed and looked back at the screen to make sure everything was running as it should.

          “Anymore, yeah. I’ve been desensitized I guess,” he explained and I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head. I turned to look at him and our eyes met. I quickly looked away and tried to ignore the way his intense stare made my heart flutter.

          “What’s it take to get you going, Sweetpea?” He asked, the use of my moniker making me a little more excited that I wanted to admit. Maybe it was a good thing he had stayed away, I wasn’t sure if I was okay with how easily he was making me flustered.

          “I don’t know,” I shrugged and turned away trying escape his influence. “I never put thought into it.”

          “Danger is always a good one,” Ryan said as I heard him stand. “The risk of crashing at high speeds. Of getting caught or shot during a heist. Of not being able to escape.”

          As he said the last one, I felt his body press against the back of my chair and he pushed me into my desk. For good measure, he even put a hand on either side of the desk to cage me in.

          “I personally get a kick out of giving people those feelings,” he told me, his breath rustling the hair on the back of my head. I gulped and became aware that the thudding I was hearing wasn’t my bouncing leg, but my heartbeat.

          “Like right now. I’ve got you trapped, and I can tell by your breathing and your leg that your heartrate is up,” he whispered and slipped a hand just above my knee to stop my nervous fidgeting.

          “I remember reading that you have quite the hunter’s instinct,” I commented, doing my best to keep my voice even. The growl that he let out made my eyelids flutter as I inhaled sharply.

          “Tell me about it Sweetpea,” he growled. “Tell me what you’ve read. I’ll tell you what’s right and what’s wrong.”

          “Um,” I hesitated and licked my lips nervously. “That you like to toy with people. You enjoy, uh, causing a scene because it makes people panic. Um. You like to be in control of the situation.”

          As I spoke, his grip would tighten on my thigh as it tried to twitch despite his hand and would send a new wave of tingles through my body. As I said it, I realized that I was playing right into his hands. I was letting him get the upper hand on me and control me, and part of me was totally okay with that.

          “That’s correct Sweets,” he hissed as the tip of his nose pressed against the back of my head. “I love to be in control. Even if it means blowing shit up and creating chaos. When I say ‘jump’, everyone better jump.”

          “It’s hardly fair when you saying ‘jump’ is actually just an explosion,” I threw back at him, finally breaking through the nervousness that he was giving me.

          “That’s the best part though,” he giggled and pushed me farther into the desk. “It’s the most genuine response.”

          I jumped and squeaked as he quickly spun my chair around to face him. He stopped me as our noses touched, his wild blue eyes filling my vision. It wasn’t until his hand replaced itself higher up on my leg that I realized that I was trembling.

          “See?” he cooed. “Would you have done that if I had told you I was going to move you?”

          All I managed to choke out was a small whimper and he chuckled, sending a shiver down my spine. His hand slid up my thigh and gripped my hip almost painfully as the other wrapped around my throat. He slowly stood me up, his grip never faltering as he kicked my chair out from under me. I whimpered again as he sat me on the edge of my desk.

          “You follow my lead so well,” he murmured approvingly, and the praise made a small smile tug at my lips.

          I had never been controlled like this, though to be honest I had never met someone who could so effectively. Some had tried, but it always came across clumsy or overly aggressive. There was something about Ryan that made me want to follow him.

          His thumb had started to slip under my waistband when we heard the door unlock. I gasped as Ryan released me and stepped away from me before Geoff could open the door.

          “Sup boss?” Ryan asked innocently. I was stunned at how blank his face was, not a hint of what just happened being betrayed by his expression.

          “Wanted to let you out to discuss the plan for tonight,” Geoff said slowly, eyes flicking between the two of us.

          “Cool,” Ryan nodded and made for the door. Before leaving, he turned to me and winked.

          “See you around Sweetpea.”

          “See ya,” I waved back weakly.

          “What did I just interrupt?” Geoff’s eyebrows practically merged with his hairline.

          “I’m not totally sure,” I sighed softly.

          “Do they not know about our test tonight?” I asked, shaking away the tingles in my body and getting back to business.

          “No,” Geoff said, also getting into Crew Mode. “I don’t want them dropping their guard because they think you’re watching their backs for them.”

          “Fair enough,” I nodded. “I’ll be able to hear and see you through the security system, but you’ll only be able to hear me through this earpiece. Gavin really fucked it, because I could only get it to receive my audio. If the audio in the security gets fucked, I won’t be able to hear you.”

          “Hopefully it doesn’t get that bad,” Geoff reassured me. “Should be a simple in-and-out job.”

          I nodded and we went our own ways for the evening.


	2. Push and Pull

        I pushed the power button on my ear piece and sighed heavily.

        “Geoff, I know you’re not at the bank and I can’t hear you yet, but I want you to fucking know that I hate you for turning the door locks on my office around,” I groaned into the mic as I sat on floor trying to turn the lock back around. I had started about thirty minutes ago when they left and was only just now getting it back into place.

        “There’s a special place in hell for you,” I grunted as I stood up to test to see if it worked.

        After being satisfied that I could now lock Geoff _out_ of my office, I flopped down in my chair and waited for them to get into position. I leaned back far enough that I felt my stomach flutter as my body thought I was going to fall.

        I smiled as I thought about my run in with Ryan today. The flutter settled into my abdomen and turned into a dull burn as I remembered his hand on my leg. My own hand slid down to my hip where he had held me, and I found myself longing for his touch. I shook my head and focused on the prep work that I needed to do for the heist.

        I had someone from Behind The Scenes do recon and get their hands on security footage from the bank we were hitting so that I could replace the live feed with it. Any guards on duty wouldn’t suspect a thing as they were robbed blind. Geoff had picked this location as the best hit because the systems inside were relatively new, but security was laxed. This way, if something went wrong and I lost contact with them, they could get out with minimal problems.

        The was a loud rush of static through my speakers, then I could hear the hushed conversations of the Fakes as live footage of the bank appeared on the screen.

        “That should do it,” Gavin said triumphantly as he stepped away from the transmitter box I had given Geoff to plug into their computer room.

        Ryan was tying an unconscious guard to a nearby pipe as the others kept watch around the door.

        “I can see and hear you,” I told Geoff and I saw him glance up at the camera I was watching him through. “Give me about two minutes to replace it with the footage Trevor got for me.”

        “Okay,” Geoff said and turned to the others. “About two minutes until that thing does its job and we can move around more.”

        I got to work patching the clear footage through to the security station before they got too worried that their cameras had gone out when my computer intercepted the signal.

        “Okay. I’ve got it running,” I told Geoff and he gave me a small nod through the camera. “Give me another minute to make sure they don’t come looking for you.”

        “So Rye,” Geoff said as he leaned against the wall and peered out the window. I could see the masked man’s eyes roll as he knew what was coming.

        “Brie isn’t so bad now is she?”

        “ _Sweetpea_?” Ryan questioned. “Seems nice enough. I took a nap while she worked.”

        “Oooo,” Gavin crooned while I watched the two guards in the security room check all their plugins before returning to the conversation they were having.

        “Not worthy of being referred to casually,” the Brit commented. “You must really hate her.”

        “No,” Ryan said patiently. “I just didn’t know her name.”

        “You’re good to go Geoff,” I told him and he signaled the others to move forward. “And we did talk, before you think about locking him in my office again.”

        “If you didn’t talk, what was going on when I came in earlier?” Geoff pried.

        “Nothing,” Ryan said simply as they flanked the vault door so Jeremy could open it with the code we had gotten from another info broker.

        “Didn’t seem like nothing,” Geoff laughed. “Brie looked a little… _flustered_.”

        His familiar low chuckle gave me goosebumps and I sighed. I saw Geoff’s eyes find the camera I was watching through and gave me a knowing smirk.

        “You didn’t hear that,” I growled and got a wink in response.

        “I may have intimidated her a bit,” Ryan said slyly. “Had to see how far I could push her.”

        “Two can play this game,” I muttered and Geoff rolled his eyes as the vault door swung open.

        I started to see exactly what I could do with my limited control. The two guards were still very into their conversation so I watched through the camera in their room to see if I could switch up which angles appeared where.

        When I focused back on the Fakes, they were shoving as many stacks of cash they could into their duffle bags. I could also see that Ryan was bouncing on his heels. I couldn’t see his face from this angle, so I couldn’t tell what kind of look he had in his eyes.

        “He wasn’t kidding when he said he’d be antsy,” I giggled and Geoff looked back at the hitman.

        “You okay man?” Geoff asked him.

        “I’m gonna go take care of any potential witnesses,” Ryan said with a menacing tone and exited the vault.

        “You almost done?” I asked and got a nod in response. “Good. Let’s see how far we can push Vagabond.”

        “What the hell does that mean?” Geoff said out loud and glared at the camera. The other Fakes jumped and looked around to see who or what he was talking to.

        “You’ll see,” I grinned as I watched Ryan round the corner into the hall where the security room was.

        Ryan braced himself to breach the door and I switched the cameras the two guards were looking at. They both sat in stunned silence as the six screens they had set up suddenly showed a large, armed Vagabond about to charge their door. One shot up and threw the door open, stunning Ryan momentarily. Neither of them was fast enough to beat him to the trigger, and two loud shotgun blasts tore through the speakers. I laughed hysterically as a surprised Ryan stared at the screens that I had switched to show him standing in the doorway before returning them to the footage Trevor had gotten for me.

        “What the hell did you do?” Geoff yelled at the camera as Ryan tore through the halls and back into the vault.

        “You have ten seconds to explain exactly what the hell is going on!” Ryan roared as he shoved the barrel of his gun into Geoff’s chest.

        “I’m still waiting on that answer myself!” Geoff snapped back. “The thing Gavin hooked up is a device Brie was working on. It lets her intercept the signal between the cameras and the recording device. She can see and hear us as we work, and she can alter the footage that the guards see on their screens.”

        Ryan whipped around and glared at the camera in the vault. Even through the screen, I felt a chill run through my spine.

        “Give him the earpiece,” I ordered and Geoff did so.

        “You’re right,” I giggled as he slipped the piece under his mask. “It does feel good to be in control. To make people jump when they least expect it.”

        With that he threw the earpiece on the ground and took off towards the cars. Geoff quickly it up and put it back in his ear.

        “You may have just won the bet for Gavin,” he huffed as I watched Ryan burst through the back door and disappear from my view.

        “We’ll see,” I smiled. “He told me that he likes the thrill of the chase. And while I was fighting with the door lock I realized that I did too, but not like him. He likes to chase, to control the situation and drive people the way he wants them. I like to be chased, to give them a run for their money and take control. I’m willing to bet money he will like someone who can run.”

        “What you’re saying is you’re about to get fucked one way or another?” Geoff sighed and I laughed. “You wanna place a bet now before you might die?”

        “What are the bets?” I asked as I heard Ryan’s Zentorno roar to life and peel out.

        “Five thousand that he fucks you, five that he kills you, five that he’s just got a crush, five that he just isn’t interested.”

        “Put me down for five thousand that he wants to fuck me,” I smiled and bit my lip.

        “You looking to get laid?” Geoff laughed. I saw Jack stomp her foot and mutter something under her breath as she realized that she just lost her money.

        “Not tonight,” I responded. “But we’ll know for sure when he gets here. So I’m going to go set up my defenses and prepare myself. I have it set up to totally replace all the live stuff with the footage we got from recon. The only evidence there will be is video of you entering the building, leaving the building, and the missing money.”

        “I was just starting to get used to you love!” Gavin shouted.

        “Yeah,” Jack huffed. “It’s a shame she’s suicidal.”

        “I have a chance,” I said indignantly.

        “A chance?” Geoff scoffed. “How the hell do you have a chance?”

        “If I live, I’ll tell you when you get back to the hideout.”

        I left them to finish up as I ran to the armory to grab some supplies. I definitely wasn’t a better shot than Ryan, but I knew they had some armor I could snag just in case I had put my bet on the wrong fuck. I found a smaller on that fit my torso and zipped my hoodie up around it. I rolled my shoulders and stretched my arms to see if I could still maneuver. I wasn’t thrilled with my range of motion, but it would do. I looked up and saw the ceiling racks. Making a mental note that I could climb up there to hide, I started to leave when I saw a ballistics dummy sitting in the corner.

        I dragged the dummy back to my office and heaved him into my chair before wrapping a blanket around it so that it looked like I was sitting at my desk. I stepped behind my door and opened it to its fullest extent to make sure that I could hide there and not get taken out when Ryan threw it open. Content that I wouldn’t die from being crushed by the door, I closed and locked it before turning out the lights.

        I had turned out all the lights in the hideout as I ran to prepare for the fight that was going to happen. I took deep breaths to try and slow my heart rate and to relax myself. Butterflies tickled my stomach and I giggled. Maybe I was crazy, but Ryan was right. This was fun.

        When I heard the Zentorno tear onto the street outside, I sighed one last time and pulled my hood over my face. I jumped slightly when Ryan kicked the front door open but smiled when I heard his heavy footsteps stop as he entered the dark hideout.

        “Sweetpea,” he called out, letting the syllables drag out as he stepped cautiously into the dark. The way his voice dripped with a sickeningly sweet venom made me shiver and my fingertips tingled.

        “Where are you?” he crooned and made his way towards my office.

        The handle jiggled as he tried the door and I held my breath. The door creaked softly as he pressed his ear to the other side. A low chuckle emanated from the darkness as he stepped back to kick in the door.

        There was a loud crack as the door frame shattered and the solid wood door smashed into the wall beside me. The door started to swing back closed and I snuck out after Ryan had taken two large steps towards the dummy. His posture and outline in the dim light of my computer screens made my heart flutter. He looked like a wolf stalking its prey.

        “Afraid it’s going to take more than a locked door Sweetie,” he growled and spun the chair around violently, sending the dummy falling to the floor. I quickly slammed the door shut, but the ruined frame wouldn’t keep it closed so I used some bungee cords to strap it to the closet door across the hall.

        The door knobs of both doors cracked loudly but held as Ryan tried to rip the door open. Our eyes locked and I laughed nervously as I was met with his playfully malicious stare. His arm shot out through the gap and he grabbed the collar of my hoodie and the vest underneath. I quickly undid the straps that held the vest to me and slipped out of the two garments. I stumbled backwards and landed hard on my ass.

        “Prepared. I like it,” he praised and I bristled with pleasure.

        I took off towards the main part of the hideout as he closed the door and tried again to rip it open. I quickly hopped up onto the counter in the kitchen area and climbed on top of the cabinets like I had seen Michael and Jeremy do last week. There was one more crack as Ryan forced the door open. I froze in place as he stalked into the kitchen, his eyes scanning for shadows and motion. He walked right past me as he walked into the conference room they used to hold heist meetings so I hopped down to move into the armory.

        I landed harder that I had expected and let out an audible “oomph” as I hit the floor. I scrambled to my feet and bolted to the door before he could realize what the sound was. I hopped up onto the table at the center of the armory and crouched to leap up to grab the racks. I had just left the surface of the table when I felt hands grab my hips.

        I squealed with laughter as I felt Ryan yank me out of the air, his hands firmly gripping me as he pulled me to him. The momentum and my weight knocked him of his feet as we connected, and he landed hard on his back. A jolt of fear tore through me as he groaned and gasped for air and I spun around to make sure he was okay.

        I was met by a hand gripping my throat and his triumphant gaze. My body relaxed as I realized that I had been caught. There was no getting out of this, and I let myself shudder as the tension left my body.

        “No more fight left in you?” he teased. His chest was heaving and his face glistened with sweat in the dim lighting. I let my legs slide to either side of him as I straddled his waist to change the angle at which he was holding my neck. The shift of position allowed me to breath better, but he held me firmly in place otherwise.

        “Not tonight,” I sighed as I leaned into his hand for support, the burst of action catching up with me and causing my body to ache.

        His grip adjusted as he realized what I was doing. He shifted to cup my cheek as he gently lowered me down to lay on his still heaving chest. I rolled off him so that he could breathe, but he followed me and reversed our position. His breath tickled my neck as he carefully laid himself across my body so that he didn’t put too much weight in one spot.

        “Where did you learn that Home Alone bullshit?” he laughed as his arms wrapped around me. One arm slid behind the small of my back and the other cradled my head.

        “A combination of fighting off bullies and an over active imagination,” I giggled and I felt him laugh.

        He rested his head in the crook of my neck and I shivered at the sensation. His sandy blond hair brushed against my cheek and the smell of sweat and his cologne filled my lungs as he buried his face in my neck.

        “That was fun,” I sighed and turned my head into his.

        “I told you the thrill of the chase would get you going,” he chuckled and tightened his hold on me. I wrapped my arms around him, the leather softly creaking as I did so. I giggled and he let out a questioning hum.

        “I honestly thought you might kill me,” I laughed and he laughed with me. “I didn’t think I’d be getting _aftercare_ for throwing a wrench into your murder plot.”

        “I thought about it,” he growled playfully as he sat up to look at me. “And about halfway here, I realized that our little interaction earlier was too good to be worth killing you.”

        “Oh?” I asked as I looked up into his eyes. He had a gentleness in them that I didn’t expect from a man who murdered two people less than an hour ago.

        “It’s not often someone still manages to mouth off to me when I’m trying to intimidate them. Usually the second I set my eyes to them, people just kinda devolve into screams and stutters.”

        “Glad not being a push over saved my life for once,” I smiled and he laughed.

        “We should do this regularly,” he sighed. “I could use this kind of stress release more often.”

        “Right,” I snorted. “I’ll get right on that. I’ll go rig up some paint cans and blow torches.”

        His laugh was so genuine it actually kind of startled me. I was also surprised by the sensation of his fingers carding through my hair as he leaned back down to let our noses touch.

        “No,” he said and his hand gripped a fistful of my hair, the sharp tug made me whimper.

        “I mean play cat and mouse. This chasing and teasing is too good. I need more, and I don’t think anyone else could keep up with me.”

        “And what do I get out of this?” I pondered and was met with an even stronger tug at my hair.

        “Don’t act like you don’t like this,” he growled and leaned back down. He used his grip on my hair to expose the soft flesh of my neck and my skin bristled as he slowly nuzzled below my ear.

        “I may not get the opportunity often, but I can tell when a woman is turned on.”

        I gasped and moaned softly as he bit and kissed my neck. I could feel his lips spread into a smile as I shivered.

        “You give me what I want, and I’ll give you what you want,” he hissed as he pulled my hips into his. I whimpered as I felt his erection rub against me through our jeans.

        “Do we have a deal, Sweetpea?”

        I nodded quickly and he laughed wickedly.

        “What was that? I couldn’t hear you.”

        “I’ll play your games,” I murmured as I to buck my hips into his.

        “Any time I ask?” he asked and nipped at my ear.

        “Given that I’m free and want to,” I sighed as his lips pressed against my jaw. “I’m not going to let this get in the way of work.”

        “Of course not,” he hummed and left a trail of kisses along my cheek.

        His lips pressed against mine gently at first but when we locked eyes as he pulled away, I found myself pulling him back in for a rough kiss. He felt so good against me. The way his hips slowly thrust into mine and the hungry way he kissed me made me lightheaded.

        I wasn’t a saint. I had been around the block and was good at not developing feelings, but Ryan made me need him. Something about the way his hands felt as they explored my body made me dizzy. I giggled as his thrusts became needier and wrapped my legs around him.

        I unzipped his leather jacket and he wasted no time throwing it to the side before returning to letting his tongue explore my mouth. I let my hands slide up his chest and I felt him bristle at my touch. His muscles twitched as he slowly sat up to sit back on his heels, his firm grip on my waist and head keeping me flush to him as he moved. He moved his hands to cup my ass as he groaned into my lips.

        “Yes?” I teased as I pulled his head down into my chest.

        “This is why I avoided you,” he huffed and bit at my chest through my shirt. “I wanted to wait until I could have you to myself all night if you let me.”

        “It’s only nine,” I sighed and kissed his forehead.

        “Yeah, but the others are probably almost here,” he whined. “And we’ll have to count money and go over how the night went. I’ll get yelled at for killing needlessly. You’ll get yelled at for fucking with my needless killing. By the time I can have you again, the rush will be gone.”

        “So,” I smiled and tugged on his hair. “We’ll just have to get the rush back somehow. Is that not what we just agreed on?”

        I felt his grip tighten as his low chuckle rumbled through my body. I giggled in return as he looked up at me, his eyes glowing with desire.

        “I knew I was gonna like you,” he growled.

        Before we could do anything more, the main door opened and the lights flicked on. Ryan sighed sadly and let me slide out of his lap. He helped me up as there was a slew of gasps and swears from the returning Fakes as they immediately went to investigate my office.

        “What the hell?” Geoff shouted angrily and Michael burst into laughter.

        “I don’t see a body or blood,” Jeremy huffed as the two of us walked out of the armory. “However, there is a set of armor in Brie’s hoodie but no Brie.”

        “She lives!” Jack cheered as we rounded the corner.

        “Barely,” I joked. “I thought he had me when he grabbed my hoodie.”

        “How did you destroy the closet _and_ your office door?” Geoff groaned.

        “Some clever use of bungee cords,” Ryan said and I smiled.

        “You’ve got to tell me what fucking happened here,” Michael laughed as he grabbed a few bags of money and moved farther into the hideout.


	3. Payoff

          A while later we had all gathered in the armory as Geoff and Jack ran tonight’s haul through the money counters. Ryan and Jeremy were sitting at the table cleaning their weapons as Gavin, Michael and I tossed a tennis ball around.

          “Where the fuck did you learn that Home Alone style bullshit?” Geoff laughed as we finished telling him what had happened, leaving out everything after he caught me of course.

          “That’s what I said!” Ryan exclaimed as he slid the barrel of his pistol back into the receiver.

          “And like I told you, a combination of fighting off bullies and an overactive imagination,” I sighed and aimed for Gavin’s nose as I threw it as hard as I could in my sitting position.

          “Who would bully you?” the Brit huffed as he swatted the ball away before it could connect.

          “I was the freak,” I laughed as Jack kicked the ball back to Gav. “Literally and figuratively.”

          “How is one a literal freak?” Jack asked and I saw Ryan smirk.

          “I grew up in the circus,” I said matter-of-factly. The room fell silent as they all stared at me.

          “Come again?” Jeremy asked and set the shotgun down.

          “Have I not mentioned this?” I asked. “I could swear I’ve mentioned it before.”

          “I think I would remember something like that,” Jack chuckled.

          “Yeah,” I shrugged. “My dad raised me and he was a magician who performed with the circus. I learned all kinds of carnie things but was also the social outcast.”

          “That certainly explains your confidence in jumping up into the rafters,” Ryan smiled and motioned to the ceiling.

          “Yeah. I was his assistant. I can throw knives and axes. Years of sneaking through the rafters for Dad’s tricks has made me pretty stealthy,” I shrugged. “And I can escape ropes and stuff.”

          “Oh?” Ryan hummed and cast a sly glance at me. Jeremy saw this look and kicked Ryan under the table. “What?”

          “Okay,” Geoff said as he put the last stack of money into the counter. “I want to nip this before it becomes a problem. You two are not going to let whatever is going on between you get in the way of work right?”

          “Nope,” Ryan and I said in unison.

          “And no more fucking around during a mission like that,” Geoff ordered and pointed to me. “It could have ended very badly for us. They could have been smarter and hit the alarm.”

          “Yeah,” Ryan huffed. “Or I could have been shot.”

          “You wouldn’t have been in the situation if you had sat still,” Geoff snapped and moved his finger to the hitman.

          “You had me locked in a room for three hours!” Ryan threw his hands in the air. “I needed some action!”

          “You could have gotten all the action you needed if you weren’t asleep!” Geoff retorted. The rest of the room looked to me as if they expected me to be upset at their conversation. I shrugged in response.

          “Well yeah,” Ryan smiled and glanced to me. “I’m sorry I was going to go slow with her. Didn’t know she would force my hand but taking advantage of my psychotic nature.”

          “Be less predictable,” I mumbled.

          “Don’t try me Sweetie,” he grumbled back.

          “Stop,” Geoff ordered. “Before I fucking throw up.”

          “I think it’s adorable,” Jack teased in a baby voice. “Rye’s in love.”

          “I’m not in love,” he huffed and everyone’s eyes darted to me.

          “Don’t look at me,” I said and held my hands up. “I’m just along for the ride.”

          “Harsh!” Michael laughed.

          “It's fine,” the hitman shrugged. “Keep it casual. Less pain that way.”

          “I do believe there needs to be some exchange of funds though,” Jeremy smiled.

          Ryan looked around confused as Jack, Michael, and Gavin reluctantly reached into the bags of tonight’s haul that had been given to them as payment. Each one tossed a wad of cash to Geoff as the older man laughed like a school girl.

          “You guys are the worst,” Ryan scolded. “Who bet what?”

          “Michael said you didn’t want to socialize. Jack said you had a crush. Gav said you wanted her dead. I said you wanted to get your dick wet,” Geoff smiled, holding up a stack of money for each bet.

          “I believe I get half of that,” I coughed and rubbed my fingers together.

          “No,” Geoff snapped and held the money away from me. “You had insider knowledge when you placed your bet.”

          “I knew as much as you did,” I said and ignored the glare I was getting from Ryan.

          “You get a third. No more,” Geoff relented and threw a stack at me.

          “Stingy bastard,” I grumbled and added it to my meager earnings. I had gotten a smaller portion because of my smaller roll in the heist.

          “Fuck you!” Geoff groaned. “I have to pay to fix those doors. You can deal with a smaller cut.”

          “And no sex,” Ryan grumbled and I looked at the bag of cash.

          “Was it worth it?” Michael whispered to me and I only squinted harder at my bag.

          “I’m inclined to say yes,” I said finally. “But I’m sure I’ll change my mind when I go to bed alone later.”

          “Serves you right,” Ryan huffed as he put away the guns.

          “I’m sure I’ll live,” I shrugged and zipped up my bag. “You need me anymore Geoff? Or can I go home now?”

          “You can go,” he sighed and waved. “I want to think for a bit before I decide whether or not your device is something we can use.”

          “Well then I’ll see you all on the flipside!” I called over my shoulder as I left the room and a chorus of good-byes followed me out the door.

          I took the long, winding route home I usually did and once I was about halfway home, I called my best friend Meg. She was going to want to know about this. She was dating Gavin, so I’m sure she knew about the situation to begin with, but the Fakes could be surprisingly tight lipped sometimes.

          “What’s up fam?” she answered after a few rings.

          “You’re not going to believe what just happened to me,” I laughed as I peeled out from a red light.

          “Does it involve Ryan?” she asked immediately.

          “Maybe you will believe it,” I rolled my eyes as I sped home.

          “Sweetheart,” she groaned and I could hear a chair creak as she sat back. “I’ve been waiting for this!”

          “What the hell does that mean?” I snapped, laughing lightly.

          “It means I’ve known something was going to happen between the two of you the second Gav told me you had been offered the position.”

          “What did you think would happened?”

          “If I had to guess you ran your mouth around him, he got angry and pushed you against the wall, and you’re pervy ass got off on it.”

          “You’re almost right. You’ve got the concept down,” I muttered and bit my lip. She knew me too well.

          “You always were weak for anyone who can push you around,” she laughed. “What did you do?”

          “I may have fucked with him during a heist.”

          “Brie!” she shrieked loud enough that I worried that my windows might shatter. “How are you still alive?”

          “By the grace of God, years of circus performances, and Ryan’s benevolence.”

          “Why the hell would he let you live?” she asked and I stayed silent as I remembered the feeling of his hips grinding into mine.

          “Brie?” Meg called out and pulled me out of my memory.

          “We came to an agreement,” I smiled slyly. There was a long moment of silence.

          “Dear God,” she gasped. “Geoff won the bet didn’t he?”

          “To be fair, not yet,” I giggled. “Though it’s an inevitability.”

          “What’s the agreement? You have sex and he doesn’t kill you?”

          “No,” I snapped. “He likes to toy with people, and I like to be toyed with.”

          “You’re sick,” she chided playfully.

          “Everyone’s got their thing man,” I smiled.

          “And yours is dating a mass murderer who will kill you the second he wants to.”

          “I’m not sure we’re going to call this dating,” I corrected. “More like mutual stress relief.”

          “Uh huh,” she hummed.

          “What?” I grunted. “I can stay unattached.”

          “To guys that bore you,” Meg laughed. “I don’t think this will bore you.”

          “What’s wrong with that?”

          “Nothing!” She said quickly. I heard a door open in the background. “I just think you may be in for more than you think.”

          “Well, we’ll just have to see then,” I said shortly as I pulled into my apartments parking garage. “But I’m home and it sounds like Gavin is too.”

          “Brie says hi,” Meg said away from the phone and I heard the Brit’s chuckle get louder.

          “Hey Brie. Clever what you did at the hideout,” he said after I heard him give Meg a kiss. “Don’t think Ryan was expecting you to fight.”

          “I don’t think so either,” I laughed. “I’ll see you tomorrow Gav.”

          I got out of the car and started to check my emails as I walked to the elevator. I was reading through some files while I waited when I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I casually looked around as if I had heard something but couldn’t shake the feeling that I was being watched. The doors opened and I waited a moment before entering. My last pass over the dark garage didn’t yield any more results, but I still felt uneasy.

          The ride to my penthouse apartment was just as uncomfortable. I was alone, but my gut said something was wrong. I walked to my door in silence and cautiously eyed every dark corner in the small hallway. I entered my apartment and is was quiet except for the pool filter outside. That’s the way it should have been. I didn’t live with anyone, and I didn’t have pets so it was perfectly fine to be this quiet. The feeling still didn’t go away as I walked through my home, turning on all the lights and checking every possible hiding spot. Finally I gave in and stopped looking.

_I’m just being paranoid._ I told myself as I stepped into the shower and cranked the water to the point just before it burned. I needed to relax. I let the water fall over me as I thought about my day.

          There were a few nuggets of valuable information that I happened to catch today that I would have to look at in the morning. A couple drug deals and a weapons shipment that I’m sure the Fakes would like to step in on.

          My hands scrubbed soap into my skin as I hummed to myself and remembered the way Ryan controlled me in my office. I felt a familiar warmth pool between my hips as I imagined his hands gripping me like before. I sighed sadly as I realized that I wasn’t going to be feeling that tonight.

          I finished my shower and threw on a bathrobe before exiting my room to get a drink. I leaned over my counter as I sipped from my Dr. Pepper and scrolled through a map of one of the drop off points I had seen mentioned. There was a small creak from the floor as I shifted my weight, but it didn’t sound like it was from me.

          My hair stood up again, but before I could react and hand gripped a fistful of my hair and forced my face to the countertop. I screamed and tried to kick back but my attacker caught my calf and forced themselves between my legs, pinning me to the counter with their hips. I reached out for my knife block but was met with their other hand slamming down on top of mine as I brushed against one of the handles.

          I grunted and tried to thrash around, but their grip was too strong and my movements only made them hold me tighter.

          “What do you want?” I spat and tried to look at them, but my hair and the angle made it impossible to see. The response I got was a slow hip thrust as my attacker rubbed his growing erection against the thin fabric that covered my body.

          “Fuck off!” I yelled and tried to shake him off me but I only got a low chuckle in return.

          “Haywood!” I screamed at the familiar laugh. “You motherfucker let me go!”

          “No,” he hummed as adjusted his grip on my head. “I like you right where you are.”

          His new grip allowed me to look back at him. I melted into the counter a little as he looked down at me, eyes glittering as he took in my body laid out in front of him. He still had the eye black on, but over the course of the day it had started to streak across his cheeks and temples. His jacket was missing, and his chest and biceps strained against his black t-shirt as he held me down. He let go of my hand and waited to see if I would swing it before he took his now free hand and slowly ran it along my waist.

          “I hope now’s a good time for you,” he hissed. “That’s what we agreed on. Anytime I want, as long as you’re free?”

          When he reached the top of my hip, he gripped me tightly and pulled me back into him and canted me downwards to let my ass rub against him.

          “I thought I was being punished for betting on you?” I questioned. My voice was breathy and as I spoke I realized that I could feel the moisture gathering between my legs.

          “I was going to,” he smiled wickedly and slid his hand around to my belly.

          “But on my way home I decided that wasn’t fair to you,” his voice was so low and smooth as he spoke it was giving me goosebumps as he untied the loose knot that held my robe closed.

          “You bet your hard earned money on getting fucked,” he said through gritted teeth as he yanked my head up. His smile turned into a grin as I whimpered at the action. He lifted me so that I was sitting up flush against him, his breath was warm on my skin as he slid the robe off my shoulders.

          “Who am I to get in the way of your winnings?” he whispered in my ear as the robe pooled around our feet. “You want to get fucked Sweetpea?”

          “Yes,” I whined and shuddered as his warm fingers gripped my breast. He kissed the soft flesh right below my ear.

          “Yes what?” his voice was so soft I almost didn’t hear it over my racing heart.

          “Yes I want you to fuck me, please,” I begged as he massaged my chest. I smiled as he chuckled in my ear.

          “Be a good girl then,” he murmured and let go of my hair. “Bend back over the counter for me.”

          I shivered and whined when he let go but bent over obediently. The granite was cold on my bare chest and I ached for his touch as he stepped back. He hummed approvingly as he looked me over and I wiggled my hips playfully. I was rewarded with a firm slap across my ass and I moaned as the action left my skin tingling. He let one hand slip between my thighs as the other fought with his belt.

          “Look at you,” he cooed and pressed a finger to my clit. “You want me that bad?”

          “Mhm,” I hummed as I bit my lip. His finger began to swirl around the sensitive bundle of nerves and my leg twitched as he played with me.

          “Good,” he said as he pulled his zipper down. He pulled is hand away and I sank into the counter, having not realized that I had been on my tip-toes. His belt clattered against the tile as he stepped out of his jeans.

          I glanced over my shoulder and whimpered as I saw him tug his shirt over his head. He was fully naked now and my whole body surged with anticipation. His torso was covered in scars, the round bullet holes and angular stab wounds telling his criminal history. A light patch of chest hair trailed down his belly and guided my gaze to where he was now stroking his hard cock.

          “Like the view?” he teased and gently spread my legs to give him more access to me.

          All I could do was nod and his smile made me weak, so I laid my head down. The countertop was cool against my flushed face and I could see fog form on the surface as I exhaled. I bit my lip as I felt him press his tip against my opening.

          My light whimper turned into a moan that reached a crescendo as he slid his full length into me. He rested his hands on my waist and panted lightly as he let me settle around him. My mouth hung open as he slowly pulled away and groaned.

          “Fuck,” he moaned as he started to work into a rhythm. “You feel so fucking good.”

          My eyes rolled with pleasure at his praise and my mouth hung open as he slowly thrust into me. His hands firmly gripped my hips and I moaned at his touch. I groaned as he started pulling me into his thrusts, forcing himself deeper into me. My nails clawed at the counter, trying to find anything to hold onto. My fingers ached to wrap around something as he sped up.

          “Is this what you wanted?” he panted as he stopped his thrusts. I rolled my hips back against him, desperate for more.

          “Fuck yeah,” I moaned as I rocked back and forth on his cock. His hands slowly rubbed my lower back as he moaned with me. I bit my lip as my nails dug into my palms. _Why did he feel so good? Why did I need him so bad?_

          Suddenly he grabbed my waist and thrust hard into me. I screamed and shuddered with pleasure as he would slowly pull out before slamming back into me. I could feel the pressure building as he started to move faster and looked over my shoulder at him.

          Sweat was starting to form droplets on his forehead and across his chest. His hair was stuck to his face in some places and his eyes were dark with lust as he watched me bounce against his hips. The way he looked at me made my toes curl and I moaned his name. His gaze shifted up to met mine and I groaned as he gave me a sly smile.

          “Say it again Sweetpea,” he hissed and slowed down.

          “Ryan,” I whimpered. “Don’t stop please.”

          “Why?” he growled.

          I felt my response catch in my throat. I knew exactly why, but I didn’t want to sound needy. I wasn’t a needy person, why was I acting like one?

          “Why Sweets?” he repeated and moved agonizingly slow. I could feel a haze build in my mind as I tried to fuck back into him, but his hands held me firm.

          “’Cuz I want you to fuck me hard until I come,” I groaned and still tried to grind into him.

          “You sure?” he hummed and slid one hand around to my front and slowly rubbed my clit.

          “Yes!” I whimpered and shook as just his simple action pushed me close to the edge. “Please Ryan.”

          I almost fell to my knees when he pulled out, but he caught me and sat me on the counter as he pulled my hair and mashed our lips together. I moaned into his mouth as I realized how badly I had been wanting to touch him. My fingers dug into his shoulders as he positioned me onto his throbbing cock and I felt his airy moan as he pressed his hips flush to mine.

          He bit my neck hard and I could feel his fingers twitch against me when I moaned his name. He sucked and kissed at my chest as he sped up, a low laugh rumbling through him as my sounds of pleasure increased in pitch.

          “Oh fuck yes Brie,” he moaned into my chest as I tightened around him. “Fucking come for me.”

          I whimpered as he started to thrust harder. I yanked his head back by his hair and kissed him through our moans. My forceful action garnered a low, carnal groan and his thrusts became so rough it almost hurt. My whole body was on fire with sensation as I finally tipped over the edge with his name on my lips.

          His hand slammed down on the edge of the counter for support as he rode through my orgasm. He bit down hard on my lip and I felt his body tremble as his own climax hit. His thrusts became slow and his moans less controlled. Soon we were both whimpering messes as we clung to each other.

          I don’t remember much after that, the haze of sex and a busy day finally taking its toll. I remember being carried back to the shower, being rinsed off and being covered in kisses. I remember the amazed look he gave me when I introduced him to makeup wipes for his eye black, and the feeling of his arms wrapped around me as we fell asleep.


	4. Parting the Curtains

          The sound of a phone going off woke me up and my groan harmonized with the one the sleeping man beside me let out. I slapped my hand onto my nightstand where I kept my phone and sleepily searched for it.

          “Hello?” Ryan grunted into his device as my hand bumped into my own. I checked the time and huffed.

          “Tell them six in the morning is too early to give a fuck,” I yawned and rolled over to lay my head on his chest. He laughed quietly and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

          “No, I’m not at my apartment. Why are you at my home Geoff?” he asked and I giggled as Ryan twirled some of my hair. There was a short conversation before Ryan put the older man on speaker phone.

          “I hope you two had a good night,” Geoff teased and I smiled as I stretched out across Ryan. “I have a job that will require the two of you to work together.”

          “Why does this need to be discussed before the sun rises?” I muttered.

          “Because I was going to bother Ryan about it on my way to work, but he wasn’t there.”

          “Why do you go in so early?” I continued and Ryan laughed.

          “I don’t usually, but _someone_ needs to be there when the repair guy comes in to fix the doors you two broke,” Geoff growled.

          “Ryan broke ‘em. I just hid behind them,” I giggled and had my hair playfully pulled for my smart remark.

          “What’s the job Geoff?” The hitman interjected.

          “Brie, you remember that info broker that burned us just before you joined?” Geoff asked.

          “Yeah,” I grunted and closed my eyes. “Asshole owes me money still.”

          “Yeah, well some of that stuff you sent me last night lead me to the fucker’s place of business. I say we need to roll in and show ‘em what happens when they fuck with the Fakes.”

          “Where do I come into play?” Ryan huffed as he stroked my cheek.

          “The guy works at startup company that specializes in concealable self-defense weapons and junk. Mace, brass knuckles, tasers, smoke bombs, small handguns, the works. If shit were to go down, I want you to be there to get Brie out.”

          “Why me?” I muttered.

          “Because I have reason to believe he uses his work computer for information distribution. I want you to get in there, rob him blind of all his info, and leave a special surprise so that he knows what he’s done,” Geoff explained.

          “What kind of surprise are we talking about?” I laughed as Ryan’s fingers trailed along my jawline.

          “Something subtle. Like replace all his info with a note that says ‘Fuck you. Love, the Fake AH Crew.’”

          “Subtle,” Ryan huffed.

          “It’s what we do best,” Geoff chirped. “I’ll let you two go back to sleep. I’ll forward the info to Brie and we can work out a detailed plan when we’re more awake.”

          “Thanks Geoff,” I said and the line went dead.

          Ryan set his phone back down and rolled over to face me. He cupped my cheek in one hand and kissed me passionately before pulling my head to his chest and wrapping his arms around me tightly. I didn’t have time to question him before I was drifting back to sleep.

*~*~*~*

          A few hours later, my alarm started to go off and I reached out for it. My fingers naturally shut it off and I stayed still for a moment. I look over to Ryan who was lying beside me, his long blond locks tangled around him, eyes half open and face stuck in a grumpy scowl as he too tried to wake up for the day.

          “Morning sunshine,” I teased and got a huff in response. I sat up and retrieved my phone. As I sifted through emails, the man beside me started to gently rub my thighs.

          “How you feeling?” he mumbled as he squeezed.

          “A little sore, but fine,” I shrugged and got an approving nod.

          “Wouldn’t have pegged you for the soft and gentle type,” I giggled.

          He growled and sat up before biting my shoulder. I whimpered and smiled as he pulled me on top of him and wrapped his hands around my waist.

          “Forgive me for taking care of you a little,” he sneered. “People tend to disappear if you don’t treat them right.”

          I could feel his morning wood as he kissed any part of me he could reach.

          “Besides, isn’t this what you want?” he muttered into my chest.

          “Yeah,” I responded and pet his hair. “I guess I’m just surprised how tender you are.”

          “Again, mistreatment is a turn off, and I don’t want to lose this,” his eyes flicked up to mine and they twinkled playfully. “Where else am I going to find a freak who can handle me?”

          I laughed and pulled myself from his grip. There was a flash of disappointment in his eyes, but it was only there for a second before he smiled as he watched me walk around my room.

          “Speaking of freaks,” I said as I pulled out some underwear. “How the hell did find my apartment?”

          The wide smile and his genuine laugh made my heart flutter. Seeing him stretched out and relaxed in my bed made me bite my lip as I started to dress myself for the day.

          “Ran into another resident,” he explained and tucked his hands behind his head as he watched me. “Little old lady was more than happy to help me reconnect with an old flame.”

          “Really?” I rolled my eyes. “Would have loved to hear that conversation.”

          “It was mostly her saying she wished she could do something romantic like that,” his eyes darkened a little as I pulled a tight maroon sweater over my head. “I think the little lady would have had a heart attack if she knew what I had in mind.”

          “Small Asian woman? Was probably wearing a green dress?” I asked and he gave me a curious look.

          “That was her,” he replied.

          “She’s got a black belt in three different martial arts and was known as the ‘Jade Dragon’ in her hay day. Used to be recon for one of Los Santos’ first powerhouse crews,” I explained as I imagined the file I had on her and pulled on a pair of black skinny jeans. “I can’t imagine that you would surprise her.”

          “Do you have dirt on all of the tenants here?” Ryan inquired as he finally got out of bed.

          “If they have dirt, I’ve got a file on them,” I said simply. “Geoff didn’t hire me just to make his life a little easier. I’m easily one of the most influential people in Los Santos. I’ve got everything from shady political dealings to the life story of most crew members.”

          Ryan was very serious as he approached me, and his look of caution made me smirk.

          “I’ve got a file on everyone that means anything in this city,” I explained as he squared up to me. His posture and expression were stony and impossible to read, but I did my best to stand up against him.

          “Why _did_ Geoff hire the most prolific broker in the city?” he grunted. “And why did she say yes?”

          “Mutually assured protection,” I said after a moment of thought. “I don’t tell any of your secrets, you give me a safe place to work. And Geoff owed me.”

          “Oh?” Ryan hummed and pinned me to the dresser behind me.

          “Someone was snooping around trying to get info on the Fakes. Offered me a pretty penny for you and Geoff’s files,” I lifted my head so that my lips grazed his chin. “Not pretty enough though. I was kind enough to warn Geoff and I believe you took him out.”

          “I remember this,” the hit man muttered. “He had a slew of things he said about you while I toyed with him. Didn’t know ‘slut’, ‘whore’, and ‘cum dumpster’ were supposed to be you.”

          “Well, apparently, he had friends who missed him. Geoff was taking me out for dinner to repay me for warning him when they decided to jump me,” I looked for a response to Geoff and I’s prior interaction, but when none came I continued.

          “They didn’t expect Geoff to round the corner as they tried to shove me in their van. A few well-placed bullets and a panic attack later, I was sitting on the floor of Geoff’s apartment eating straight from the carton of ice cream as he ordered a pizza.”

          “How romantic,” Ryan said dryly and stepped away and started to walk over to where he had dumped his clothes.

          “It was a one time thing Ryan,” I tried to explain. Suddenly my heart was sinking, and I found myself chasing after him. “Honestly, he was just repaying me for the warning. You know how he is.”

          “So,” he huffed. “What was a warning worth?”

          “Dinner, drinks, and a shitty movie apparently,” I laughed as I remembered sitting at his house and yelling at the actors. I watched Ryan stiffly shrug on clothes and it dawned on me.

          “What’s wrong?” I asked and stepped in front of him. He immediately avoided looking in my eyes, but I saw the angry shimmer in his.

          “I wasn’t aware I would be getting sloppy seconds,” he grunted.

          I felt a flash of anger wipe through my body and his hard glare as he pulled his pants on made the edges of my vision turn red. I threw a punch and stunned him as I connected with his chin. He stepped back and took a lowered stance as he assessed the situation.

          “You listen to me Vagabond,” I barked and let his code name roll out like it was an insult rather than just his name. “Geoff and I got a little handsy but we didn’t fuck. So you can take that how you want, but if you think for a second that I’ll let you get away with trying to shame me for who I spend my evenings with, you can fucking take our arrangement and shove it up your ass.”

          “It was a one time thing,” I repeated as the larger man stood up straight. “And it happened almost three months ago. Besides, I didn’t think our arrangement required exclusivity.”

          I watched him rub his chin as he thought hard about this. I focused on my breathing and tried to calm myself down. I turned around and started to head to my bathroom. I still needed to put on makeup and brush my teeth. I was never hungry when I got up in the mornings, but now the thought of food made my stomach roll.

          I felt a hand wrap around my wrist and Ryan pulled back to face him.

          “Listen,” he muttered and slid one hand around my waist and held my wrist. He looked slightly uncomfortable as he picked the words he wanted to use. “It wasn’t meant to involve exclusivity but thinking about Geoff’s hands all over you makes me want to break them.”

          “You should have thought about that possibility beforehand,” I grunted.

          “I may have rushed into it without thinking,” he smiled wickedly. “The chase was a little too good to pass up until I could step back and think about what I wanted from you. Though you didn’t exactly pump the brakes either.”

          “What do you want from me?” My voice was low and firm, the tone I used when I had to do business over the phone. He could tell what I was doing, and his wickedness spread into his eyes. I felt his hands tighten around me as he formed his thought.

          “I don’t want anyone else to touch you like this,” he growled and ran his fingers over some of the crescent shaped grooves he had left in my hips.

          “You want to be my boyfriend?” I asked and he winced at the word.

          “No,” he corrected quickly. “I don’t want that. There’s no room for that level of relationship in my line of work.”

          “But Gavin and Meg-”

          “Gavin isn’t Vagabond,” he cut me off harshly. “You know just as well as I do that Gavin’s information is pretty available, but no one wants Gavin dead bad enough to use Meg against him. I, on the other hand, am Los Santos’ ‘Masked Marauder’ and have every crew in the city taking pot shots at my head for the chance to take the Fakes down a peg or two. No one deserves to be put in the crossfire of that.”

          “So you want all the physical perks of having a girlfriend, but none of the emotional ones so you don’t get hurt if someone kills me.”

          “You make it sound as if exclusivity is the variable that keeps you from being a target,” he sneered as he finally let go of me and stepped back. “My fuck toy or my girlfriend: Either way people will try to use you to get to me.”

          Once again we squared up to one another, and I couldn’t help but admit that Meg was right. I had bitten into more than I chew.

          “Besides,” he snarled in confusion. “You were alright with it all until now. You got so many guys in the wings that you can’t humor me for a while?”

          I lunged at him, catching him slightly off guard. I knocked him off balance and he started to tumble backwards but he caught me and took me with him. I landed hard on top of him and my head spun as the wind was knocked out of me. He threw me off him and tried to pin me down, but I slipped away and hopped back up onto my feet.

          “Fuck you Vagabond!” I snapped as he slowly rose to his feet and eyed my movements while I spoke. “It’s one thing to keep it casual and let you manhandle me in bed, but I’ll be damned if I let you lock me into a relationship that I can’t step out of whenever I want!”

          “I never said you couldn’t back out!” he snapped back.

          He was right. At no point did he ever say that I couldn’t leave. I just assumed that he wouldn’t let me go if I wanted to. This realization only made me more angry.

          “Someone doesn’t like not being control as much as I do,” he grinned as he realized why my heart was racing and panicking. “It’s not the idea that bothers you, it’s the phrasing. It was fine when it was just letting me use you a bit. It was fine until I took control of ‘us’ away from you.”

          I snarled and jumped at him again. He was absolutely right and I hated it. One of the downsides of working in the circus is the terror that comes with losing control of the situation. Where Ryan was more about direct control, I preferred to sit back and pull strings. As long as I had it under control enough that I could escape any catastrophic failure, I was happy. I had managed to keep it under wraps for most of my life, and now that he was dangling it in front of me with my own strings I was absolutely livid.

          He was ready for me this time and easily side stepped me as he wrapped an arm around my waist. He locked me to his chest and wrapped his other hand around my neck as he maneuvered me to look at myself in my dresser mirror.

          “Feel that Sweetpea?” He hissed in my ear as he watched our reflection with something like joy in his eyes. “That was what it was like to see my fucking face on the monitors last night.”

          His hand tightened as I remained silent and I let out a low growl as the action turned me on. He nipped at my ear and I shuddered as his own growl filled my head.

          “Fucking look at us,” he murmured. “Control freaks who get off on fucking with each other’s plans.”

          I giggled evilly as his hand on my waist dug in deeper. My anger was fading and was being replaced by an unsettling feeling. The feeling that I might be okay letting him be the only one who can pin me down like this.

          “I’ll let you back out of this at any time,” he continued. “As long as you promise me I’m the only one who gets to rile you up like this.”

          “Our relationship has taken quite a few turns since the original agreement last night,” I muttered.

          “We haven’t exactly put thought into it without first trying to kill each other,” he giggled and sucked on my earlobe.

          “Maybe we should,” I sighed as I finally relaxed into him. His grip loosened and he gently held me too him as he kissed my neck.

          “We have work to do first,” he said as he reluctantly pulled away from me. “Once we take care of this douche, we can iron out the many wrinkles of whatever the hell we are.”


	5. Can't Be All Bad

          We were on our way to his apartment so that he could change his own clothes and I was checking my makeup in the visor. I had gone all out with the contouring and was making sure that I didn’t immediately look like myself. I had also opted to wear my fake glasses to further distort my visage. My hair was pulled back in a high ponytail and I curled the tails by my ears around my finger.

          “You look great,” Ryan said quietly as we sped through the city in his Zentorno. I sank back into the seat and flipped the visor back up, thankful that I probably had enough foundation on to hide my blush.

          “Thank you,” I smiled and looked out the window as the city passed by. “Geoff said to look professional, but sexy enough to be distracting.”

          “You’re killing it,” he grumbled as I crossed my legs and shifted in my seat. The high heeled boots I had chosen made my thighs flex against my jeans. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye and I saw him staring out the corner of his.

          “Eyes on the road Haywood,” I teased and his eyes darted forward. “Let’s go over the plan again.”

          “We’re going to pose as tech support,” he said. “We know that he has made a service request that he claimed was urgent. That’s why Geoff thinks he uses the work computer for his information distribution. I’m your boss and you’re being trained for higher profile cases. We go in, confirm that it’s his, take what we can, leave what ever virus you have ready for him, and go.”

          “Hopefully it all goes smoothly,” I cast another glance at Ryan. “I just hope we don’t run into two security guards trapped in their surveillance room.”

          I saw the wicked smile spread across his face as he pulled his car into a private garage entrance. He flashed an ID card of some kind and the gate opened. This must have been his private garage, because all the cars had the same TESERACT license plate and black and green color scheme.

          “I need a private garage,” I stated as I looked around.

          “Yeah, it’s pretty nice. Keeps strangers from showing up in my home,” he replied and I glared at him. “But yours has a swimming pool.”

          “I’ll drown you in that pool,” I grumbled and felt my phone buzz as the doors locked me in the elevator with Ryan.

_Meg: I hear your agreement paid off ;)_

          I rolled my eyes and peeked over my shoulder to see if the hitman was being nosy. He was watching the numbers go by as we neared the top floor.

_Me: You were right…_

_Meg: I know I’m right. Geoff spilled the beans to everyone._

_Meg: Wait…_

_Meg: What are you talking about?_

_Me: I might have bitten off more than I can chew_

          There was a soft ding and the doors slid open and I was surprised by how bright it was. The place was just like every high-rise penthouse: Huge windows, fancy amenities and appliances, and an open layout. The difference being that Ryan’s had a second floor, and from the bottom of the stairs it looked like it had to two bedrooms.

         “Make yourself at home,” he smiled as he grabbed the handrail for the stairs then took the stairs two at a time and disappeared into one of the rooms.

_Meg: Like… In a bad way?_

_Meg: Did he hurt you?_

_Meg: Do I need to kill him?_

_Me: I’m fine. It was great. He’s great, for the most part._

          I wandered around the first floor while I waited for Meg to respond. The kitchen and dining area was decked out with black appliances and dark, hardwood furniture. It all had a very modern look and I got the feeling it was what the apartment came with and not his own choosing. The living room was more like what I had imagined would be his style.

          I had always thought he’d live in a dungeon, and I wasn’t horribly far off aesthetically. The walls were lined with shelves that held mostly books that ranged from looking ancient to still having price tags on the covers, a few even had receipts stuck between the pages as temporary bookmarks. Some shelves were full of various bladed weapons that had a similar age range to the books and as I looked over his collection, my own folding knife became heavy in my pocket as I found the same model sitting among a cluster of Kershaws.

_Meg: What’s wrong?_

_Me: We’re a little too similar…_

_Meg: Like did he take you on a killing spree? Or does he like high fantasy shit as much as you do?_

          I glanced up at the few period correct swords he had hanging on the wall and smiled a little.

_Me: He does like knives. But that’s not what I mean. He’s controlling._

_Meg: I thought that was a part of the appeal?_

_Me: He found out about my control issue…_

          Meg was the only other person who knew about my need to pull strings and control the situation. She had witnessed first hand what happened when someone pulled my control away. Meg watched me lose control to someone who was trying to hurt me and make me his, and she watched how it destroyed me mentally for months as I recovered.

_Meg: Why the fuck would you tell him that? I know it’s casual but Jesus that’s one hell of a load of baggage._

_Me: I didn’t tell him. A conversation went south, he got a little jealous of a past relationship and said he wanted me to be his but without a serious relationship._

_Meg: A) Oooooooo that’s one way to find out about your problems and B) How did he find out about Geoff?_

_Meg: Fuck_

_Meg: Uhhhh_

_Me: How did_ you _find out about Geoff?_

          I plopped myself down on the couch and put my feet up on the coffee table as I pulled out my laptop. I plugged in a USB and got to work on the virus Geoff wanted me to leave behind if this was this asshole’s info distribution point. I was thinking something along the lines of Jurassic Park. A nice little middle finger that chants an antagonizing phrase.

_Meg: He gets loose lips when he comes over for bevs…_

_Me: I’ll deal with that later…_

_Me: In the meantime, what do I do about Ryan?_

_Meg: Gav warned me that he can be a little jumpy sometimes if he feels threatened and to keep an eye our for any problems like that._

_Meg: How do you feel about it?_

          I let the code run a bit to make sure it would loop correctly and thought. I had been pushing it away all morning so that I could focus on work, and nothing had cropped up other than pleasant conversation and light flirting. I couldn’t ignore the fact that last night had been great, and even this morning up until the altercation was pretty good. I also couldn’t shake the feeling of safety I had when he was around. Even before yesterday, when he was in the same room I felt the safest I had ever been since I had gotten into information dealing.

          As skittish as his comments had made me feel, now that I was calmer and not feeling cornered, he wasn’t raising the same red flags that other people had in the past. I didn’t feel like he was threatening to tie me down and strip me of control so that he could in turn control me. He had accidentally stumbled into a hornet’s nest. He wasn’t looking for it to exterminate.

_Me: Idk… As much as it freaked me out, I’m inclined to trust him._

_Meg: wow_

_Me: You’re telling me. Am I just being thirsty af? Should I be running away instead of taking it?_

_Meg: You’ve got some of the best people judging skills I’ve ever seen, and I’m willing to bet that they aren’t abandoning you now even if you are thirsty._

_Me: We agreed to talk about it later. After a job._

_Meg: Wait… he agreed to negotiate?_

_Me: I mean, he didn’t use those words, but when you put it that way it does make me feel better lol_

          I giggled as I thought about how he might react to that comment and the sound caused the pile of blankets beside me to move. I was stunned as I watched the bundle of fleece blankets shift around until a scarred, brown face appeared from the covers.

_Me: He has a dog. I’m in love. Fuck everything else._

_Meg: You fucking freak_

          A small pitbull stretched out from it’s nest, tail thudding repeatedly against the couch as I did my best not to lose my shit. I wasn’t allowed to have pets in my apartment and after years spent taking care of dad’s rabbits and birds, I felt empty without a companion at home. The brown and white pit rolled over onto it’s side as it set its heavy head in my lap.

          I set my laptop aside and began petting the dog with one hand and taking a picture of the lovable loaf that was leaving drool on my jeans as I scratched his tummy.

_Me: He can’t be all bad if he has a dog. Can he?_

_Meg: You are way too easily swayed by animals_

_Me: It’s not my fault they’re better than humans 90% of the time_

          “Why is Gavin texting me saying that another man is stealing you from me?” I heard Ryan call out as he descended the stairs. The dog in my lap shot up and leapt over the back of the couch as he raced over to greet his owner.

          “There you are Edgar!” the man smiled as he dropped to one knee to accept the pitbull’s affection. “Where were you hiding?”

          “He was under the blankets over here,” I answered and watched him as he squished the dog’s face in his hands and was greeted with a slobbery kiss. “Now I know where the tender part of you comes from.”

          “It blew the crew’s minds when I took him,” he laughed as he went to the kitchen for a towel to wipe his face. “You’d have thought I grew a second head.”

          “Why on Earth would you get a dog?” I giggled as the animal in question danced around Ryan’s feet as he opened a cabinet.

          “We went in and took a drug dealers warehouse. Son of a bitch was also running a dog fighting ring and unfortunately most of the poor things were scared out of their minds and needed to be sent to a rehabilitation facility to make them pets again,” he explained as he filled a bowl full of food and placed it on the ground. “This little guy though, he broke out of his kennel and took down a guy who snuck up on me and got my gun away. He gave me enough time to get my weapon back and kill him myself. He followed me out of that place and back into the getaway car.”

          “I first kept him because he had gotten hurt in the scuffle, so I agreed to care for him while he healed,” Ryan continued as Edgar loudly chomped on his breakfast. “Little guy grew on me, so he stayed.”

          “How does he get out of the apartment?” I asked as I looked around and didn’t find any signs of an animal who was cooped up and bored.

          “One of our B-Team, Lindsay, she comes and walks him every other day or so. As for his business, there’s an emergency exit to the roof upstairs. I cut a doggy door into it, had someone landscape an enclosure, and pay the building’s maintenance to clean it up,” He explained, and I took the moment to look over his outfit.

          He had settled on a nice pair of black jeans, black high-top Converse, and a bright blue polo with a chest pocket that he had stuffed a few pens into. He had followed my lead and wore glasses, but his looked real and I confirmed this by moving my head around and seeing the lenses distort his face. The kicker was the bun he had tucked his long hair into.

          “The nerd look is good on you,” I complimented, and he laughed out loud.

          “You have a file of my information. You know the irony, don’t you?” he grinned.

          “Web developer, right?” I smirked and he nodded.

          “I want to apologize,” he said suddenly, like he was forcing himself to say it. “This morning was, interesting, to say the least.”

          “I thought we were going to save this for after the heist?” I interjected as I stuffed my laptop back into my backpack and slipped the USB with the virus into my pocket.

          “We can work our details later,” he clarified as he pulled his own backpack on and waited for me. “I want to get this out of the way now, before it becomes a problem. I was already a little on edge considering the circumstances. It’s been a long time since I’ve been with someone like that, so when you said that you had all my information that you and Geoff had gotten close, I flipped out. I felt exposed and threatened.”

          “Which is why I freaked out in return,” I sighed as I followed him to the elevator after I gave Edgar a quick pat on the head. “You hit a soft spot with the ‘I want you to be mine’ schtick and I panicked.”

          “And as much as I did enjoy seeing you lose it like that,” he said slyly but with an apologetic glance in my direction. “I shouldn’t have provoked you like that, but I was lashing out.”

          “To be fair, I don’t have _all_ your information,” I shrugged as the elevator doors opened to the garage. “Only what ever is available. That’s why I didn’t know your name when Geoff asked yesterday.”

          “I still don’t like the idea that it’s floating around,” he grumbled as he looked around and checked his watch.

          “It’s not,” I huffed in a short laugh. “I’m a business woman Ryan, and I’ve gotta be better than my competitors. I found the information and then wiped it from the ether. I’m the _only_ one with your info. That fact alone was what kept me safe prior to working with the Fakes.”

          “I’m not sure how to feel about that,” he grunted with a small smile as he eyed me.

          I smiled back, a little bit of pride pumping through me as I regained some of my control. He looked at his watch again and an irritated frown replaced his smirk, but before he could voice his concerns the garage door opened, and a plain black sedan pulled in.

          “About time Jonesy!” Ryan shouted as the car parked in front of us and a woman stepped out of the car.

          I recognized her as Lindsay Jones, Michael’s wife, by the vibrantly dyed hair. She flipped her red hair over her shoulder as she huffed at Ryan.

          “Listen buddy, I had to follow this one for a long time and traffic sucked ass. Damn you look good Haywood, even with the man bun,” she teased him so easily that I could tell that they had known each other for a long time.

          “Go fuck yourself,” he grunted back as he poked his head around the vehicle she had brought. After a short laugh she turned to look at me and blinked hard a few times.

          “They keep you locked up in the computer room?” she exclaimed as she looked me over. “More importantly, you fucking chose ManBun McMurderFace to bang?”

          “To be fair, that’s a disguise,” Ryan called out as he pulled the backseats up to check under them for anything.

          “Well unless she’s actually a fucking troll under that makeup, my comments stand,” she grinned and winked at me.

          “And ‘chose to bang’ isn’t exactly what I would use to describe this,” I smiled at her as I felt his glare from ten feet away.

          “Yeah. I heard. Geoff says it’s more like asteroids getting caught in each other’s orbits,” Lindsay smirked and Ryan cast her an inquisitive glance.

          “How they can’t help but change course as they pass by?” Ryan asked and I laughed.

          “Awe. That was sweet Rye-Bread,” she winked. “No he said it was because we were lucky it was only a pass by or else we all would have fucking died. And from what I saw in the pictures he sent me of the doors, we are _very_ lucky.”

          I broke down into laughter as the hitman growled.

          “I’m going to teach him a lesson in keeping his mouth shut,” Ryan grunted.

          “Please, we all know about your girlfriend. You weren’t subtle with it all,” Lindsay jeered and I looked to him for a response to the use of the ‘G’-word.

          “Not my girlfriend,” he hissed and stood close enough to her to move her hair with his breath. “She’s just a girl that I’m seeing.”

          “Your Jedi mind tricks don’t work on me,” she continued to tease and pushed him away with one hand. “And you keep telling yourself that. We’ve all seen you admire her from a distance. She’ll grow on you just like Edgar did.”

          “‘Admired’ me?” I hissed and his face exploded with red as his glare flicked between me and Lindsay.

          “We’ll discuss this later,” he growled in a low tone that made both me and Lindsay shrink back a little bit. “Edgar just ate, so you can walk him if you want while you wait to swap this out with one of mine.”

          “You got it Mr. MurderFace,” she grinned and waved as Ryan pulled me to the car. “Good luck! Don’t fuck it up!”

          Ryan peeled out of the garage and I tried my hardest to hide the evil grin that hadn’t left my face since Lindsay told his secret.

          “What?” he snapped and I looked over to him to see that he was angrily chewing on his thumb and his knuckles turned white as he gripped the steering wheel.

          “I’ve been with the Fakes for a month and you still haven’t decided how you want this relationship to work,” I said coolly as I shifted my weight so that I was facing him in my seat, legs crossed, and a hand held lazily in the air as I rested my elbow on the door.

          “I was rushed,” he growled as the red started to reappear on his cheeks. “I hadn’t planned this far.”

          I let my laugh roll through the car as the tables turned back into my favor. I had the power over him now.

          “We will discuss this later,” he said through gritted teeth. “Let’s go over the plan again.”


	6. Sweetpea's First Heist

          The walk from the parking garage to the location was silent as we both prepared for the task at hand. I had my backpack thrown across my back and was trying to get into the shy quiet character we had agreed on. It would be best if I kept quiet because I hadn’t played such an active part of a heist and I didn’t want to freeze up while trying to play an over bearing character.

          I glanced at him as we stepped out of the alley that separated the street between the garage and the office, and I could almost see him stepping into the boss character as he stood straight, rolled his neck and let a little cheer come through his tired eyes. I read about his theater experience, and until now I had thought it was bullshit, but as I watched I grew excited to see his performance.

          We entered the office and eyes glanced up at the two newcomers before returning to work. In two long strides, Ryan was leaning over the secretary’s desk.

          “Hello,” he crooned and any remaining sleep vanished from his eyes as he pinned her down with his gaze. “We’re here to work on Mr. Anderson’s computer.”

          “It’ll take two of you to do it?” she asked suspiciously but laughed as she leaned towards him.

          “She’s new,” he explained and thrust his thumb in my direction. I waved shyly and gave her a polite smile. “She’s got most of it down, I’m here to make sure she does this one right. We were told it was urgent, so I don’t need a rookie mucking it up.”

          “Fair enough,” she nodded and stood to lead us to the office.

          “So what exactly do you do here?” he asked as a display case full of small knives and brass-knuckle type weapons drew his attention. “All I was told was you were in self-defense.”

          I glanced around as she told him everything we already knew. Some people were watching me walk by, their eyes following my legs as we walked by. I gave one a shy smile when her gaze came up to my face, and immediately she buried her face back into her work.

          “Mr. Anderson is out for lunch at the moment, so if you have questions just let me know,” she chirped as she held the door open for us.

          “If all goes well, we’ll be out of here before he comes back,” Ryan smiled as I headed straight for the computer that sat in the middle of the room.

          Once the door was closed, he began checking the room for bugs and cameras and I got to work sifting through the files on his computer. There was a lot of stuff that I was expecting. Designs, R&D, Address Book, Quarterly Earnings, Research.

          I hummed excitedly as I opened the Research folder. Why would he need that if he had one for R&D already? Ryan heard my hum and walked over to stand behind me as the huge file loaded in.

          “Bingo,” I sneered as familiar codenames and places started to pop up with accompanying folders. “This is our douchebag.”

          I fished a case of flash drives and portable hard drives out of my backpack and retrieved a clean hard drive to transfer the information on to.

          “This could take a bit,” I warned as I watched the progress bar slowly progress. “He’s got quite a bit of information, and I want to take his address book.”

          “Why?” Ryan asked as he took a dagger off a shelf nearby and twirled it in his hands. It looked like a black, military surplus weapon with a blade about seven inches long.

          “I have a feeling that it will contain more than contacts for this self-defense business,” I explained and drummed my thumbs anxiously on the arms of the desk chair. “Maybe I can take some of his buyers from him while he’s out of commission.”

          “What will you do with that?” he continued and I could hear genuine interest in his tone.

          “I’ll track them down, tell them that their information was compromised and if they want it to remain a secret they need to keep their mouths shut. Any informants will be warned similarly, but with the promise of future business if they play nice.”

          “I should have seen your control streak sooner,” he teased and I stuck my tongue out at the man who was slipping the dagger into my backpack.

          “Everything my father ever taught me about the circus and performance centered on one fact: ‘You need to maintain control of all possibilities.’ It was too ingrained in me by the time I realized that it was going to be a problem,” I frowned as the last few files took forever to transfer.

          “That’s not a bad philosophy in this line of work,” he smiled and sat on the desk beside me.

          “The problem is that it is how my entire brain works now,” I grunted as I began transferring the address book onto another flash drive. “Everything has to be considered so that either the trick works, or I can escape if it goes bad.”

          “I understand that,” he said quietly and I looked up at him. He was looking down at me and his eyes were focused on my neck, like he desperately wanted to bite it. I rolled my eyes and pulled the USB out of my pocket.

          “I thought you were numb,” I teased as I began the process of destroying his computer with my virus. “I thought it took a bit to get you worked up.”

          “Turns out you’re different,” he grinned. “But that’s for later. What are you leaving behind?

          I chuckled evilly as I played a preview of the main thing. A black background that had the words “This should be enough to make up for what you owe us” in neon green text as a rubber duck swam across the screen with the FAHC star on its sides. Ryan added his own appreciative laugh as he took a picture on his phone.

          “Geoff will love it,” the hitman smiled as he sent the photo to his boss.

          I checked my watch and was surprised to see that twenty minutes had already passed. Once the virus was in place, I shut the computer down and packed up.

          “When he turns it on and tries to open his research folder, it’ll kick on and brick his computer,” I explained as I threw my pack over my shoulder.

          “What was actually wrong with the computer?” Ryan asked as he opened the door for me.

          “Looked like a RAM leak. Maybe a failing CPU,” I guessed as we walked back to the front of the building.

          “Done and done!” Ryan cheered as he hit his hand on the front desk and startled the secretary. I saw a bit of joy flash through his eyes as she put her hand to her chest and gasped.

          “Just a little RAM leak,” I muttered as I slipped back into my character. “It should be ready to go when he gets back.”

          “Good!” the secretary smiled. “How do you want to get paid?”

          “We’ll send an invoice in a few hours once he has a chance to open the computer and test our fixes,” Ryan smiled wide and waved to her as we made our way to the exit.

          Once outside, we looked around and grinned at each other as a clearly marked car for an IT company pulled into a parking space across the street. We quickly made our way back to the garage and once we were in the elevator, he mashed the emergency stop button as I pulled his leather jacket and skull mask out of my bag.

          He threw the items on and I could hardly tell that it was the same person under it all, except for the awkward way the mask fit over his glasses. He pulled on the sockets of his signature black skull as he tried to make it comfortable.

          “Maybe the glasses were a bad idea after all,” he grunted as he gave up on comfort and hit the button again to restart the lift.

          He pulled out a gun and checked the clip, and I felt a nervous chill take over my arms as I pulled my backpack on and he slid the loaded clip back into the pistol. We had agreed to make it look like he was kidnapping me so that people wouldn’t immediately assume that the guy who was with me was Vagabond as we drove away in one of his cars, especially as they were finding out about our deception right now. Still, I couldn’t help but to fear the masked man as he handled the gun with a familiarity that only this line of work could provide.

          “Ready?” he muttered as we reached the floor that Lindsay said the Zentorno was on. I nodded and took a deep breath as the doors slid open.

          My surprised yelp was genuine as he roughly grabbed my arm and shoved the barrel of his pistol into my back. I couldn’t tell what reaction his laugh was directed to, mine or the terrified people who were in the other side of the doors. His gun leveled with each of them as they either ran or ducked in fear and he dragged me towards his car. I put up a light struggle. Enough to look like I was trying but not enough to actually throw Ryan off. He shoved me face first into the car as he opened the passenger door and threw me into the car. He had shoved me so roughly that I had to scramble to sit in the seat correctly as he slid across the hood.

          We were speeding out of the garage to the tune of police sirens when I started to giggle. My heart fluttered as I turned in my seat to see the cops trying in vain to catch up with Ryan as he wove through traffic at high speeds. I tried to stop my giddy laughter, but Ryan drifted around a corner and the police rocketed by, surprised by his sudden turn. I couldn’t hold it and broke into uncontrollable giggles that escalated into short laughter anytime Ryan evaded our pursuers by drifting or other dangerous maneuvers.

          “I told you all the fun was at high speeds and involved danger Sweetpea,” he growled and I could tell by the way his eyes crinkled in the corners that he was grinning under his mask.

          My only response was to laugh more as he yanked the wheel and slid under an overpass. He slowed down and parked the car in a dark corner behind some shipping containers and the sounds of the police faded into the distance. He ripped the mask off and grabbed a fistful of my hair as he pulled me into a rough kiss. I struggled to silence my giggles but he didn’t seem to mind, eagerly eating them up as he pulled me over the center console and into his lap.

          His free hand searched the space between the door and his seat and the other let go of my hair and slid to cup my cheek as he continued to kiss through my giddiness. He hummed into my lips as his hand found what it was looking for and pulled the lever that reclined the seat.

          We each gasped in surprise as the seat flew backwards as far as it could in the Zentorno’s small cabin and we fell with it. My nose smashed into his when we landed and there was a grunt of pain as Ryan’s glasses pressed into his eyes. He pulled way long enough to toss his glasses into my vacated seat with his mask and I let my fake lenses follow them before we pressed your faces back together.

          Eventually my giggles faded and the only sounds were the road noise from the freeway above us, the occasional pop as we sucked on each other’s lips, and our soft moans. I had opened his jacket and was running my hands up his chest, eliciting a shiver and quiet curse from the man beneath me, when his phone buzzed loudly and startled both of us. He hit the gas as his foot tried to find purchase to fish the ringing phone from his back pocket, and I snorted as the revving engine made us jump again.

          “Yes Geoff?” Ryan said sweetly but I could see the irritation in his eyes as his free hand continued to knead my waist. I sighed and shifted my weight so that I could lay across his body, my head resting on his chest.

          “We’re getting word over the blotter that Vagabond was seen kidnapping a woman involved with a potential theft,” the older man’s voice rang out through the car’s Bluetooth. “You two good?”

          “Yeah. We’re fine, just waiting for the heat to die down,” Ryan sighed as his hand slipped up my sweater and his fingertips gently ran along my back.

          “You get what we were looking for?” Geoff’s voice was even a firm and I could tell that he was in full boss mode.

          “And then some,” I chimed in. “I got his whole address book, so we may have a few more sources.”

          “Fucking dope!” the man complimented, and I smiled into Ryan’s chest as he set his phone down and shifted me around so that he was holding me tightly in his arms.

          “Get any heat while on foot? Or was it all after you got back to the car?”

          “After,” Ryan explained. “We passed by the actual IT guys and booked it before our cover was blown. I threw on my jacket and mask in the elevator and put on a show to distract them.”

          “I can’t wait to see how they try and figure all that out,” Geoff laughed. “By the way, Brie, fucking brilliant with the note. The duck was a nice touch.”

          “You said subtle,” I smiled and Ryan’s chest rumbled with laughter.

          “So, you two good now?” the man asked and I heard his boss tone begin to drop.

          “Yeah, we can probably head back to the hideout now,” Ryan said reluctantly, and I sat up to get back into my seat. I took a moment to appreciate the way he looked beneath me and snorted loudly when I looked at his face, which was smeared with my lipstick.

          “What was that?” Geoff ask with concern as I flopped over into my seat, careful not to sit on his glasses, and Ryan shot up to look at himself in his visor mirror.

          “Nothing,” I wheezed as the hit man rubbed at the deep red color that our make-out session had left across his mouth and jaw. My laughter returned as he bared his teeth and groaned at their matching stains.

“Brie,” Geoff said with a tone of dire importance. “He is not allowed to change what ever it is you’re laughing at. I expect it to be exactly the same when you get your asses back here ASAP!”

          “Deal Boss,” I managed to promise through gasps for air, and Ryan glared at me as he took his glasses from my outstretched hand.

          He was a good sport and only glared at me a little bit on our way back to the hideout as I cleaned my own face with the makeup wipes I had in my bag. I was surprised that he was going to willingly walk to face them like that, but then he snatched his mask back from me and pulled it on before we pulled into garage for the Fake’s hideout.

          He must have known that they would be waiting, because Lindsay was by the elevator when we pulled in. He stiffly got out of the car and stalked over to the waiting woman while I trailed behind and prepared for the show.

          “I knew you weren’t a troll under all that contouring,” she smiled as I approached and looked over Ryan. “I thought you weren’t allowed to let him fix whatever made you laugh?”

          “She didn’t,” came the low, exasperated grunt from behind the mask as he rubbed the hand that I had smacked away from the wipes several times.

          “Good!” her eyes lit up. “Then let’s go. Everyone is eager to hear how Brie liked her first real heist.”

          “Don’t flatter me Lindasy,” I laughed. “I know how you all work. You just want what ever it is that made me laugh.”

          “I mean, why not both?” She asked as we took another elevator ride to the top floor of the hideout. Ryan hesitated by the door in the short hallway before Lindsay stepped around him and threw the door open.

          There was a collective groan of disappointment as the entire Fake AH Crew stared at their mercenary, who appeared to be normal. The three of us entered the hideout and as Lindsay closed the door behind us I was rushed by Geoff.

          “You promised!” He snapped as the others nodded in agreement. “Unless he held a gun to your head, you have no excuse.”

          “I didn’t let him fix it Geoff,” I grinned and looked over to the masked man who was creeping towards the bathroom, my backpack in hand, while everyone’s attention was on me.

          “Get him Lads!” Gavin jeered and the three younger Fakes charged Ryan.

          He tossed the pack to the side and easily flipped Gav over his back and took Jeremy’s shoulder with his own and used the momentum to send the lad into a near by wall. Jack joined me and Geoff as Ryan and Michael circled each other and the fallen lads got to their feet. Lindsay had crept to the side and was digging through my abandoned backpack. Usually I would get upset, but I watched with a smirk as she laid out its contents to see why he wanted to take it with him.

          “He took that while we were at the location,” I explained as she pulled out the dagger and looked at me with concern.

          I watched as she looked over my laptop, makeup wipes, case of storage devices, and change of clothes. There was a small gasp from Jack as she too watched the investigation but came to her conclusion before the other redhead could.

          “Pin him down boys!” she exclaimed excitedly. “Take the mask off!”

          Soon she was also in the fray, and I could tell that Ryan was in over his head as he nervously twitched and jumped at any movement as his four crewmates circled him like vultures. Gavin lunged at his feet and before Ryan could step over him, Jeremy wrapped his arms around his buddy’s shoulders. This two-pronged attack threw him off enough that Gavin was able to wrap his arms and legs around the hitman’s legs, and Jeremy and Michael were able to hug him and pin his arms to his sides. Jack approached Ryan from the front and prepared for the Scooby-Doo like reveal.

          “What do you have under that mask Rye-Bread?” she teased and he stopped squirming in his friends’ arms. He wrenched his eye shut as she gripped the top of his skull mask.

          Ryan’s hair hadn’t even settled back to his shoulders before Geoff was on the floor rolling with laughter. The Lads let go of him so that they could step back and appreciated their lipstick stained partner in crime as he took a deep breath and sighed. His eyes opened slowly and he immediately zeroed in on me. I smiled back at him as the room dissolved into hysterical laughter around us. He wasn’t mad but as his cheeks flushed to match the lipstick, I new I was going to catch hell for this.

          “Holy shit! I’ll never be afraid of you again Ryan,” Geoff gasped as he grabbed my hand and I helped him up.

          “I’ll just have get more creative,” Ryan grunted as Lindsay handed him a wipe for his face.


	7. Change of Plans

          I was in my office a few hours later, sifting through everything I had collected from the heist and deleting duplicates. Anderson didn’t have much that I didn’t already know, but his address book was full of good contacts. I would take this home and work on it, that way I could come in tomorrow and start up on threats and deals. For now, I needed to go through and straighten out some weapons shipments so Geoff could decided if he wanted to butt in.

          I had a map pulled up and was marking the locations and included the basics of the shipment: When, who was sending/accepting the shipment, what was in it, and the location’s proximity to any one of our safehouses.

          “Thorough,” Ryan cooed in my ear and I jumped.

          “How did I not hear you come in?” I snapped as he set the lunch I had ordered on my desk.

          “I have my moments,” he grinned and settled into the couch with his burger and Diet Coke.

          “But how?” I repeated as I fished out my own burger and fries. “It’s not like your feet change.”

          “You’re a magician,” he teased and winked. “You know that I can’t revel my secrets.”

          “Dad was the magician. I was just his assistant,” I corrected and started to stuff my face.

          “Your dad sounds like an interesting man,” he said innocently but the sentiment made my chest hurt.

          “Yeah. He was,” I sighed and stared at my burger for a moment before taking a bite.

          “‘Was’? I’m sorry,” Ryan said softly and leaned forward.

          “It’s fine,” I muttered and chewed slowly. “He went quickly.”

          “What kind of accident does a magician have that ends quickly?”

          I know he didn’t mean it as harshly as it sounded, one thing this crew had in common was their blunt deliveries, but the memory made me ache enough that I set my food down and sadly swirled my soda.

          “The kind that gets your back broken,” I huffed. His eyebrows shot up and I knew I had to explain. “He had this grand trick that he did. It was what he was famous for. It had all kinds of intricate parts and one of those parts involved me having to crawl through the rafters so that I could appear on the other side of the deathbox he had ‘locked’ me in. I had been gone for a few days visiting colleges, and I came home late and rushed to the show. I didn’t have time to check the rigging myself, but Dad said it was fine. He had one of the acrobats’ set-up crews check it and they said it was okay. I get up there and he’s doing his thing, keeping the crowds attention so that they didn’t see me fifty feet up.”

          I paused and choked back a heavy sigh as the stomach dropping terror returned and I could hear the gasping and screaming crowd as clearly as I had that night.

          “I got about half way and the supports collapsed under my weight and I fell. It was just like in movies,” I laughed awkwardly. “Everything happened in slow motion. It was the longest fifty feet known to man, and the whole time I cursed myself for not checking it myself. For being late and not having time to ensure that I was safe. I could hear Dad shout my name, and I felt his arms catch my back and legs before we collapsed onto the ground.”

          I let the tears flow as the ambulance sirens haunted me and the sterile smell of a hospital room filled my nose. I felt the pain of that flatline for the first time in almost ten years.

          “I had some serious cuts from the broken supports,” I whispered and pulled my sleeve up to show the long scars the metal had left. “I’m sure you noticed the ones on my back last night. Dad… My weight and the speed I was going. It broke his back. He was in a coma for three days and when he woke up, all he said before he passed was… He said ‘At least my Sweetpea is safe. That’s all I needed to know.’”

          There was a long silence and I suddenly wasn’t hungry anymore. I felt numb and stared at the wall in front of me as I did my best to stifle the tears. I couldn’t fix it, and Dad wouldn’t want me to hurt this bad so long after the fact.

          “Did it bother you when I called you Sweetpea last night?” Ryan’s voice was low and smooth and I laughed at what he was insinuating.

          “No,” I smiled and looked at him through blurry eyes. “It was my stage name as well as his pet name for me. I respond to it like I do my actual name. That’s why I kept it as a codename. No daddy kinks here. Unless that’s what you’re into.”

          He snorted and covered his mouth as he laughed, and his genuine reaction chased away some of my pain.

          “No, or at least I don’t think so. I can’t say I’ve been with someone who does, so I’ve never tried it,” he chuckled as his sweet blue eyes leveled with mine. My hunger returned slightly, and I munched on my fries as he thought about something.

          “Is that why you panicked last night when I landed hard on the floor in the armory?” he continued and I nodded slightly.

          “So should I save our very serious talk about our relationship until later when you’re in a better mindset?” he asked and tossed his garbage back into the bag before really settling into the couch.

          “My mindset will be better once you tell me how you’ve been admiring for the last month,” I teased and he looked away from me as I ate my last fry.

          “I said you looked good in skinny jeans _once_ and they fucking ran with it,” Ryan huffed and I grinned as rolled my chair to sit knee to knee with him.

          “That still means you looked,” I continued. “And you said you were rushed earlier.”

          “I did, didn’t I?” he grumbled and continued refusing to look me in the eye. “Yes. I was rushed. Everything about you made me pay attention to you. At first I thought it was because I needed to be wary of you. You did seem like a threat, very intelligent and cunning, but the more I watched you the less worried you made me. The others talked about you all the time, and it was clear that you were fitting in perfectly with this fucked up family of ours, so I stopped worrying and started… admiring.”

          “But?” I pressed.

          “But the idea of being in a serious relationship is more terrifying than death,” he said bluntly as he finally looked at me to search for a reaction and when he found none he continued.

          “I’m more comfortable running into a fucking firefight with no armor and only one clip to my name than I am seriously dating you. I _wanted_ to wait longer so I could sort out whether you were just a crush or something more. But Geoff had other ideas and here we are. I’m torn between really fucking enjoying having someone who I can be intimate with and wanting to run the fuck away.”

          “Why would Vagabond want to run away?” I half teased, and he gave me a short, harsh laugh.

          “Because I don’t want to get attached,” he sneered. “You were right this morning. I don’t want to get hurt if you fall into unsavory hands and get killed. On top of that, I don’t think you can take the attention that would come with dating _Vagabond._ You’ll have to watch your back constantly.”

          “I think you’d be surprised as to what I’m capable of,” I huffed. “Maybe once we get closer, I’ll let you in on all the things I had to do to get to my position.”

          He laughed for a few moments but when he saw my serious expression, he just snorted and moved on.

          “Why did you panic when I said I wanted you to be mine?” he asked.

          “I have a bad history with someone who ‘made me theirs’,” I growled. “He was bad news from the beginning. A low-level criminal just starting a crew, and I was twenty and just starting my own criminal career. He swept me off my feet and I thought I was in love. He called me the Bonnie to his Clyde, and I was willing to do just about anything for him. Including take his abuse. He told me it was a normal part of a dom/sub relationship. That I was to be owned and used by him anytime he wanted. Well ‘used’ eventually included being beaten and cheated on, while I just had to accept my fate because that’s how the relationship worked. He alienated me from Meg and used the isolation to control me even more.”

          “I did get out eventually. I hit my limit, snapped out of my haze and realized what was going on. Much like you, if I can’t get out of a situation, I panic and lash out. Violently,” I continued. “That’s why I jumped you this morning. You wanted me to be only yours, but not actually date you. To stay yours, but only with the sexual benefits. At the time, it sounded a whole lot like you expected me to lay down and deal with it and I would rather fight a mass murderer than let someone control me like that again.”

          “If you have such a bad history with _being_ controlled and an ingrained fear of _losing_ control, why are you so okay with me tossing you around?” he asked

          “Because you don’t set off the warnings that my ex did,” I sighed. “Hindsight is 20/20, and now that I look back I can clearly see all the warning signs. While you have tripped a few red flags, the rest of the crew speaks highly of you despite your violent reputation. I trust you because they do.”

          “What about your jealousy towards Geoff?” I asked and moved on to the next big point of conversation.

          “I just,” he paused and I saw his fingers curl into fists. “I’ve never felt this way before. I’ve gotten used to being feared and hated, and when the occasional oddball comes onto me while I’m hiding out somewhere I just let them down nicely and laugh about it later. Only once before have I felt something close to this, and even that never became more than casual fucking. Then you roll in and I feel something… Something more. My head is spinning and I’m all kinds of confused, and suddenly Geoff is showing interest? I know I said I don’t want a serious relationship, but I’ll be damned if I give up the first real chance at _something more_ since I moved to Los Santos without a fight.”

          Again my red flags started to raise, but I saw Vagabond, dressed in his typical get up and his black paint fresh on his eyes as he waited for Geoff’s orders, look incredibly nervous and exposed as he squirmed on the couch in front me. Anyone else would have kicked them to the curb but seeing the ‘madman’ of Los Santos so vulnerable was all the proof I needed to know that he didn’t have malicious intent.

          “I’m still on the fence about this,” I sighed. “Something doesn’t seem right about the relationship you’re proposing. Do you really expect me to sit and wait for you to decide if you want to deal with a girlfriend or not?”

          His lips became a thin line as he inhaled deeply and growled lightly.

          “Don’t give me that,” I snapped. “You just said you don’t want to give up a chance at a relationship, but you also say you don’t want to have to deal with the pain that you would have to deal with if I got hurt because of the crew or your reputation. You mean to tell me that if someone walked in here right now and held a loaded gun to my temple, you wouldn’t hesitate? Even for a second?”

          He opened his mouth to argue and immediately proved my point when his objection caught in his throat and he thought for a moment. I sat back in my chair and stared him down.

          “You’re right,” I huffed as I reluctantly let go of my own feelings for him and turned back to my computers. “You need more time to think about what you want and what you’re willing to deal with in the future. I’m not putting myself out there for someone who can’t make up their mind how they want me.”

          “What happened to just being casual?” he roared and stood up.

          “This isn’t about casual sex anymore,” I said quietly as I did my best to hide the fear and sadness I was feeling. “This is about you coming to terms with reality.”

          “And what reality is that?” he snarled back, and I became aware that the conversations in the main area weren’t filtering back here like they always did.

          “That you might actually have real feelings for someone and would get hurt if something happened to them.”

          The whole world held its breath as Ryan seethed behind me. I could hear his leather jacket groan as his chest heaved and muscles flexed in pure rage. He didn’t say a word as he stormed out of my office and into the commons. I could hear Jack call out “Rye?” before he slammed the door. I folded my arms on my desk and laid my head down and waited for the sound of his car screaming down the road as he took off before I let out a shuddering breath.

          It hadn’t even been twenty-four hours since Geoff had locked him in my office, why was I crying? It was only meant to be casual, why did I try to talk him into something more serious? I grit my teeth and slammed my fist into the desk as I wondered how I could have let myself get this attached in just one day. How the hell did he wrap me around his finger so easily? How could I let someone mean that much to me in so little time? _How could I not see something like this coming?_

          “Brie?” Geoff called from the doorway and I half turned to look at him. He only looked half as concerned as Jack did as she and the others looked into my office at me.

          “What just happened?” the woman in question asked tenderly.

          “Nothing,” I grunted. “We just had to face reality. And reality sucks ass.”

*~*~*~*

          I had gone home that night and cried until my eyes and lungs burned. Meg was at a total loss as I refused to tell her exactly what happened. I knew better than to go around telling people that I had scared Vagabond away with feelings and, especially with the Fakes network of loose lips, I knew he would find out and come after me. All I wanted was to move on, with or without him.

          The crew walked on eggshells for days before Geoff finally sat me down in the commons and made me promise that this wouldn’t affect any jobs.

          “Of course not Geoff,” I assured him, perfectly aware that Ryan could hear me from where he was lurking in the kitchen. “I know how to handle work and personal problems separately.”

          Geoff glared at me as the sound of a crushing soda can only added to the tension, but he left it at that.

          I didn’t hate Ryan. In fact, for a little over a week I found myself getting excited when I heard his footsteps only to have my hopes dashed as he avoided the hall that lead to my office. I hated how I was reacting to this, and how I sympathized with him. I was just as afraid of my feelings for him as he was of his feelings for me. It scared me how quickly I had been charmed by Vagabond. How quickly the agreement of casual sex and flirting forced us to face the fact that we both might want more than that.

          My dreams taunted me by showing me what I could have, if only I hadn’t panicked and stepped back to take control of the situation. Every night I went to sleep knowing that I’d feel his touch in my dreams and wake up alone with an aching heart.

          For three weeks, we did our best to avoid each other and we developed the habit of just staring through each other if we got too close. I had given up on him coming back and had finally started to move past him when I went out on a job with the Lads.

          It was simple on paper. We go in, I steal hard drives and anything else of value from a rival crew’s computers, while Michael and Gavin intercepted a weapons shipment in the warehouse below. It was going perfectly until one of my sensors failed and I ran face first into a guard as I tried to escape out the back, where Jeremy was waiting in the car. I was shot in the shoulder after I had knocked him down and bolted for the car.

          My mistake had cost us the shipment, and I blamed myself. No matter how many times everyone told me that it was okay, that they had failed missions in much worse ways and ‘at least I got the hard drives’, I couldn’t pick myself up. I couldn’t ignore that I had messed up. Or that Ryan’s face flashed before my eyes as the bullet tore through my shoulder.

          I was staring at the progress bar as it slowly inched towards finished as I formatted the stolen drives a few days later. My shoulder was wrapped up, and I was trying to scratch under the bandages when I heard the door creak behind me.

          I froze as Ryan stood in the doorway, his eyes locked on my injured shoulder.

          “Yes?” I said curtly despite my racing heart and fluttering stomach.

          He didn’t respond, just walked further into the room until he was standing beside me.

          “Are you okay?” he muttered finally after a few tense moments.

          “Considering,” I said simply and looked him over. I saw that his hands were clenched tight enough that his knuckles where white and his palms were bright red.

          “Are you?” He seemed surprised at my question, like he was amazed that I cared enough to ask.

          “Considering,” he muttered back.

          His hand slowly rose to my shoulder as he gently touched the bandages that were covering my grazed shoulder and I tried to control myself as this made my body scream for him.

          “Considering what?” I continued and watched his face. He stiffened up for a moment before he relaxed and his eyes met mine. I felt every wall I had built in the last three weeks come crashing down as I stared into the beautiful blue eyes I had dreamt of for so long.

          “Considering I finally realized that we don’t have to be dating for it to hurt me,” he whispered and his hand drifted up to where the wound actually was.

          “I told you,” I said as I stood up slowly. His hand remained on my shoulder as I stepped towards him. “Anything else?”

          “I’m still not really sure I want to call you my girlfriend,” he gulped and looked away from me in shame before he forced himself to look back and continue. “But I’d be lying if I said the last few weeks haven’t hurt. I guess I’m just too good at keeping people at a distance.”

          “So, what do you want from me?” I asked softly as I let my tone relax so he knew I was listening, and not just because I was being polite.

          “I want to spend the night with you,” he said, and I couldn’t hide my shock as my eyebrows shot up and he gave me a small half smile. “Except this time, we need to talk about our relationship and how we can deal with any future hiccups better. I’m sure everyone wants to avoid unleashing the beast on Los Santos again.”

          ‘The beast’ he was referring to was the massive amount of hits he had taken after our last conversation. I had cried for a week and buried myself in work, while he painted the city with blood to deal with his pain.

          “I’m willing to do that,” I smiled back and I could see the relief wash over his face.

          “I want this to work out, but don’t be upset if I still avoid referring to you as my girlfriend,” he repeated firmly. I could see the way he hesitated before saying the word but could also tell that he was trying instead of just running away or brushing it off. “Or the L-word.”

          “‘Lesbian’?” I teased and he immediately snorted and laughed as he pulled me into a hug.

          We each shuddered and sighed as we wrapped our arms around the other. It was probably almost five minutes before we separated reluctantly.

          “I’ve got some work I need to do,” he said sheepishly. “Some hits I still need to collect on, so… I’ll see you later?”

          “Your place or mine?” I giggled.

          “Mine,” he smiled and started towards the door. “Edgar will keep us from ripping each other a part if it goes south.”

          “Just promise me you’re not going to wake up tomorrow and change your mind,” I continued to tease as he walked away. “I really don’t want to do this again.”

          My prodding paid off as he stopped in the doorway and slowly turned and shot me a sly glare.

          “Careful Sweetpea,” he warned playfully, and I felt every nerve in my body ignite. “Just because you’re wounded doesn’t mean I won’t get rough if you provoke me.”

          “I expect nothing less,” I smirked. His eyes raked over my body and I felt goosebumps explode all over me.

          “How could one day make me need you this bad?” he growled to himself.

          “I’ve been wondering the same thing for the last three weeks. Your dick wasn’t _that_ good,” I spat back, and barely noticed him cross the room again in two strides.

          I was too caught up in his rough kiss to notice the pain in my shoulder as he collided with me or to care about how my monitors rocked as he pinned me to the desk behind me. I gave in to weeks of pent up frustrations and grabbed a fistful of his hair and sunk my teeth into his lip before moving on to his neck. The way his hands gripped me painfully as he let out a low, longing moan only emboldened me. My hand slid down to his waistband and I hummed happily into his neck as I let go of the hickey I was working on.

          “Fuck Brie,” he chuckled and stopped my hand’s progress on his belt. His other hand went to the darkening hickey that I had left just under his jaw. “I really do need to go though.”

          “Then go,” I smiled sweetly. “I’ll be waiting for you when you get done, but don’t let that make you get sloppy. Take your time.”

          I could see his eyes swimming with remarks, but all that came out was another low chuckle as he gently kissed me.

          I remained sat on my desk as I watched Ryan go, mask hanging out of his back pocket ready for him to put it on and become the man this city feared so much, and I could see the change in how he carried himself. Less like the cornered, rabid animal he had been the last few weeks, and more like the confident hunter I knew he was.

          “Rye?” I heard Jack call out and Ryan stopped as he opened the door.

          “Yeah Jack?” he responded and I could _hear_ the smirk.

          “Everything okay?” she asked wearily.

          “I mean, she was alive when I left,” He teased. I heard him leave as the others bolted out of the commons and towards my office.

          “Oh! Geoff,” I chirped in mock ignorance as they all practically fell through the doorway. “I have a lead on another weapon run. Same assholes, different place.”

          They all stared at me amazed that I was still alive, much less that I was sitting on my desk swinging my dangling legs like a child.


	8. The Man Behind the Mask

          His bedroom was decorated similarly to his main floor: bookshelves lined with well-worn novels and even more blades. If I didn’t have my own obsession with knives, I would have been afraid. The room was dark even with the lights on as the dark grey carpet, black walls, curtains, and bed spread absorbed the light and made it feel like the lights were always dimmed just a little. The only color in the room came from his red tartan pillow cases and sheets.

          It was almost two in the morning and I was laid out on Ryan’s bed as he showered in his master bathroom. We lost track of time quickly after dinner when he carried me to his room and attempted to make up for almost a month’s separation, totally throwing our plan of just talking about our relationship out the window. I didn’t mind though, we managed discuss quite a bit over dinner, so it wasn’t a complete wash. I yawned and stretched out, my legs still feeling a little tingly in the afterglow of sex.

          We had tried to keep our hands to ourselves, but friendly conversation quickly turned to flirting and it was downhill from there. I rubbed my wrists and checked to make sure I wasn’t going to have to explain why I had friction burns in the morning. Luckily, we both knew our way around restraints and the red marks from my scarf shouldn’t be noticeable in the morning. The dark hickeys and teeth marks that littered my shoulders and chest however _would_ be there in the morning, and I was going to have to get creative with hiding them because there was no way we were going to want to wake up early enough to run by my place so I could cover them with makeup.

          I stood and glanced at myself in the mirror and sighed heavily. The marks on my shoulders may be the worst, but they were far from the only ones Ryan had left on my body. Purple crescents from his nails were still clear as day on my hips, and a faint red handprint on my ass told the rest of the story of our evening. I gently touched my wounded shoulder and huffed as a small spot of fresh blood was starting to seep through my bandages. My frown turned to a smirk as I made my way to the bathroom. I needed to shower too, and I was almost positive that he would have bandages in there.

          “Brie?” Ryan called out as I opened the door and stepped into the humid room.

          “No. It’s the Grim Reaper. I’m here to get you while your pants are down.”

          The tile was cold on my bare feet, so I quickly crossed the room and stepped into the shower behind him. He looked over his shoulder at me, giving me a mildly amused look before returning to lathering his hair.

          “You and I both know that I’m the reaper here,” he chuckled. “Unless you’re hiding a seriously impressive body count from us.”

          “That’s definitely not my wheel house,” I smiled as I began unwrapping my shoulder. “I’ve never been fond of guns. In fact, when I was little they scared the shit out of me. I couldn’t even walk by the gun case at the circus without having a panic attack until I was thirteen.”

          “Why?” Ryan chuckled.

          “Don’t know,” I hummed as I peeled away the last of the bandages and looked over my wound. “Dad always thought it was the concussion. Said I was a little too close when someone fired a canon for the show. The slap in the face and the associated terror were ingrained in my brain forever.”

          “So, what were you carrying when you heisted with the Lads?” he asked before rinsing out his hair.

          “I have a pistol,” I snapped as I grabbed a clean washcloth from the rack outside the shower to clean away the blood. “I can fire a gun, it just freaks me out a bit, so I stay away from larger weapons. That’s why I’m an info broker. Not much use for a gun when all your work takes place online or over the phone.”

          “It’s also why you don’t know how to care for a wound,” Ryan grumbled as he took the cloth from my hands. “No wonder its still bleeding and tearing open all the time. You’re only cleaning around it and leaving a big ol’ scab over the hole. You gotta debride and clean the actual wound or the scab will get too brittle and it’ll bust open at the slightest movement.”

          I watched his face while he tenderly treated the gash on my shoulder. Water dripped down his cheeks and long hair along with some residual suds from his shampoo. Outside the confines of a hair tie, his long hair looked odd on him as it stuck to his shoulders and chest. My soft snort turned into a hiss as he pushed a little too hard on the wound.

          “Sorry,” he muttered before pressing a kiss to my cheek. “I’m not used to doing this to someone else.”

          “It’s fine. I’m not used to it either,” I smiled as he tossed the dirty rag across the room and into the sink.

          He stepped back into the stream of water to finish rinsing his hair then moved out of the way so I could clean the rest of my body off. I scrubbed myself with a sponge and I did my best to stay focused on cleaning and not on his fingertips as they found the marks they had made earlier.

          “I wasn’t too rough on you, was I?” he asked quietly as he lined them up and copied his previous grip on me.

          “The last time we had sex, you broke into my house and fucked me in the kitchen,” I laughed out loud.

          “Yeah, but I didn’t leave you marked up like this,” he muttered as he gently rubbed my hips.

          “I don’t care about my hips as much as I do my shoulders and neck,” I sighed as he kissed my neck tenderly. “It’ll be really hard to hide these.”

          “I’ll take that into account next time,” he whispered into my ear and I felt goosebumps form on my arms at the idea of a ‘next time’. “I’ll have to work on not getting carried away.”

          “But you didn’t answer my question. Was it too much?” he asked again as he took the sponge from my hand. “I know you didn’t say stop or seem to mind at the time, but we were a little caught up in the moment.”

          “‘A little’?” I teased and sighed when he laughed softly into my jaw as he kissed to the nape of my neck.

          “It wasn’t too much,” I said as I let my head fall back onto his shoulder when he pulled me flush against him. “Maybe we could have talked about sexual preferences if you didn’t pounce on me when I started laughing at your horrible joke.”

          “You rolled your head back to laugh and I just couldn’t stop myself from biting your neck,” Ryan giggled as he took over cleaning my body, making sure to wipe down my belly and between my legs.

          “What are you? An animal?” I giggled as he wrapped his free arm around my waist while he cleaned my upper body.

          “I might be,” he growled before playfully biting my ear.

          Between nipping at my ear and the way his hand was slowly rubbing me clean, I couldn’t stop myself from smiling as I let out a content sigh. He took a step forward, pushing me into the stream of water so he could rinse me off before twirling me around. I sighed again as I leaned into Ryan. He smiled and kissed my temple then there was a soft, wet thud as he dropped the sponge and began massaging my back under the hot water.

          “It really has been a tense three weeks, hasn’t it?” he muttered into my cheek as he felt how tight my back was.

          “I didn’t think it would be that bad,” I admitted as I wrapped my arms around his waist. “I though I could just ignore you and get over it, but every time we passed near each other in the commons I only felt worse. I felt like I was caught in a vice and every time you looked right through me, it got tighter.”

          I could feel his chest tighten as he tried to think of something to say, but he ended up just kissing the top of my head and silently working the knots of tension out of my back. The conversation had swung dangerously close to the feelings he was still trying to straighten out, and rather than get worked up he kept quiet. He was making up for it by taking care of me though. His kneading hands replaced any affirmations that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to say out loud yet.

          Ryan was afraid of his feelings because he had never felt this strongly before and didn’t want to get hurt if I did. The biggest thing in the way of him overcoming this fear was that he wasn’t sure I could defend myself against all the people who would come after me. We were betting on his heartless reputation to deter potential kidnappers from trying to grab what appeared to be only an office fling. Why try to test him if she doesn’t really mean anything to him? The problem would be if anyone found out about the Vagabond that was currently humming while he massaged my back. If anyone found out that he had a heart, they’d do anything to rip it out and make him weak.

          As far as my feelings went he knew enough about my past abuse to know what to stay away from, and he knew that I would step away if he decided he didn’t want to risk my life just for his own personal feelings. I wanted to tell him that the fact that he was willing to ignore his own emotions to protect me meant that he was probably in for the long run, but he wanted to take these new feelings in tiny baby steps, so I decided to save that insight for after the fact. If it ever came.


	9. Back to 'Normal'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What??? Two chapters in one day?????  
> Yeah, these two chapters are so short that I decided to post them on the same day. I also feel bad for missing a week and uploading an entirely different fic instead. I needed to work out some serious plot holes with this one and My Neighbor Vagabond had been waiting in the wings for a while anyway.

          “Conference room! Now!” Geoff exclaimed as soon as I had opened the door to the hideout.

          “Yes Geoff?” I said softly as I cautiously peeked around the door frame.

          All the Fakes were staring at me expectantly and I thought I was in trouble for something but then I caught sight of Ryan, who was hunched over in his usual chair and fuming like a kid who had gotten caught stealing cookies, and I _knew_ I was in trouble.

          It had been about two weeks since we had gotten back together, and it was hard to ignore the confused looks as we went from hating each other to being playful and friendly and practically gave the rest of the crew whiplash. We had started to eat lunch together and would sit by each other when lounging around in the commons. He was still hesitant about opening up to the rest of the crew so soon, so he kept his flirting confined to the relative privacy of my office even when we were alone. But there was something about the look in their eyes that told me that then knew what was going on between us.

          “Sit,” Geoff ordered, and I sighed as I took my place at the back corner of the table opposite a scowling Ryan.

          “Something wrong?” I asked innocently.

          “No,” Geoff grinned and it was like a curtain dropped as everyone but Ryan dropped their serious looks and copied their boss’ wide smile.

          “We just wanted to fuck with you,” Geoff chuckled. “While we do need to talk, it’s nothing bad.”

          “So, what’s his problem?” I smirked as I spun in my chair to face Ryan who just squinted to focus his glare on me.

          “We tried asking him what was going on between the two of you,” Jack shrugged.

          “No,” Michael snorted. “Jack asked him if he loved you, then he seized up and we practically had to strap him to that chair while we waited for you.”

          “You don’t realize it but forcing him to face his feelings is what caused problems in the first place,” I huffed. “Assuming that’s what you wanted to talk about.”

          “Your gut instincts are impeccable,” Geoff smiled. “Clearly you’ve worked out what ever caused you to break-up in the first place, you are friendlier now than you were beforehand, but the rest of us would like some clarification on your terms of agreement.”

          “We just want to know if we should be giving Ryan a hard time for being human after all,” Jeremy winked and was immediately shushed with an angry look from the hitman.

          “Don’t force it out of him and you’ll find out,” I explained. “Like I said, forcing him to act was what caused the initial problem. Yes, we’ve worked through _most_ of it, but there are somethings he still needs to figure out before we even consider tossing ‘love’ around.”

          Jeremy was released from Ryan’s anger as he swiveled to face me and looked so incredibly grateful for talking for him. I had agreed to take as many questions as I could so that he didn’t get overwhelmed and panic again, so I settled into my chair as I saw all the questions swimming in their eyes.

          “What happened?” Geoff asked as he leaned over the table casually. “Too much too fast?”

          “You made him face things he wasn’t prepared for, shocking I know,” I smirked as eyes playfully widened at the idea of Vagabond not being prepared. “And so he panicked, said somethings that hit me the wrong way, then I panicked and he continued to say things I didn’t like.”

          “Like what?” Gavin asked as he too leaned over the table.

          I looked over to Ryan for permission to talk about the things he had said in private, and I could see him chew on his cheek as he thought before nodding slightly.

          “I didn’t take well to the idea of ‘being his’ but _not_ being his girlfriend,” I said and I saw him squirm in his seat at the word he still hesitated to say. “I have a bad history with guys claiming me then tying me down so that they can go do whoever they want.”

          “‘Being his’?” Jack repeated incredulously. “Rye, I know you’re possessive, but Jesus Christ.”

          “I was panicking,” Ryan grumbled, finally breaking his silence. “I said somethings I didn’t think all the way through.”

          “What set him off and made him want to claim you?” Geoff asked.

          Ryan smiled wickedly as he zeroed in on Geoff, and the older man looked terrified for a moment. Ryan had gotten over his jealousy towards Geoff after I had reassured him that nothing more than a sloppy, drunk make out had happened, and he had even taken to teasing me about it. So, I feared what would happen next because Ryan was getting antsy. He wanted to fuck with people again now that he was starting to be able to think clearly again.

          But he didn’t say anything, just stared at a Geoff with a malicious smirk. The older man looked to me for explanation, and I let out a long sigh and gave him an embarrassed and apologetic shrug.

          “I got chatty,” I mumbled. “I might have over shared a bit and said somethings that made Ryan jealous.”

          “No,” Geoff said firmly and shook his head. “You didn’t tell him about-”

          “Oh,” Ryan hissed and leaned forward slowly so that his chair creaked loudly. “She’s told me _all_ about it.”

          “This isn’t funny Brie,” Geoff warned because I couldn’t help but smile as Ryan’s head slowly rolled to one side without looking away from his boss.

          “I think it’s hilarious,” Ryan hummed. “Yeah, at the time it made me want to kill you, but now? Oh Geoffrey.”

          I clearly wasn’t the only one who was happy to see Ryan returning to his normal self and fucking with Geoff, because everyone else was wearing the same eager grin as our boss was the one squirming now.

          “What did you do Geoff?” Jack whispered excitedly.

          “He didn’t _do_ anything,” Ryan cooed sweetly. “Came close though.”

          “Let’s get back to the topic at hand please!” Geoff shouted and his voice wavered a bit. “I understand why that would set him off, but I distinctly remember Brie saying something about ‘facing reality.’ What does that mean?”

          Again, I looked to Ryan. I wanted him to do it, to tell them how he was feeling himself, but if he wasn’t ready I wouldn’t make him. He looked down at his hands as his playful demeanor disappeared and was replaced with the sheepish one I was used to seeing when we talked about his feelings. The Fakes on the other hand, sat in awe as he looked up at me for help.

          “Ryan is,” I paused as I tried to find the best wording for what happened and still be vague enough that he would have to explain. “Ryan is in a little deeper than he wanted to be. Or at least deeper than he is comfortable being. He needed to go think about what he wanted.”

          “What do you want Ryan?” Jack asked softly and leaned over the table to look at Ryan, who was focused on my face as he thought about whether or not he wanted to answer.

          We had made progress sorting out his feelings. We were cooking dinner at his place the other night when he called me ‘Babe’ to get my attention. It was small, but the fact that he used a pet name was a sign that he was getting comfortable with the idea of dating. The moment it had passed his lips, he looked alarmed at how easily it had slipped but it quickly turned to a happy and content smile. There had been other things, like wanting to spend an afternoon cuddling instead of having sex and letting me play with his hair while he cleaned his guns at home, so I knew he was working it out and I was proud of him. Even if he didn’t want to tell the others just yet.

          “Can you imagine what would happen if people found out that Vagabond had a girlfriend?” Ryan said finally, and I gave him a small smile as he said the word with only slight hesitation.

          “Ryan,” Jack sighed. “You can’t honestly be _that_ worried about your reputation being hurt by this?”

          “Seriously dude,” Jeremy smiled. “If anyone is dumb enough to think you’re weaker because you have positive human emotions, you just have to bust a few caps into ‘em.”

          “It’s not my reputation that I’m worried about hurting,” Ryan mumbled. “I can kill all day long to make up for any doubts that I’m losing my touch.”

          We let them think about what that meant, and one by one their eyes flicked over to me as the figured out what exactly it was that had made him panic.

          “I don’t want Brie to get hurt just because some asshole wants to test me,” Ryan continued like the seal had been broken. “I…I… I really like what we have. I’m glad that part of me isn’t dead like I thought it was, and that I found someone who can handle me. But I’m still not sure it’s worth putting her in danger.”

          “The damage has been done man,” Michael sighed and shook his head. “When you’re so concerned for her safety that you’re willing to ignore your own feelings, you’re in too deep. You should just give in and go hog wild with it.”

          “Yeah Rye-Bread,” Gavin pipped in. “Just let go and enjoy the love. We’ll protect her as best we can.”

          Ryan winced at the mention of love and it didn’t go unnoticed.

          “Ignoring the feeling and avoiding calling her your girlfriend isn’t enough to protect her Ryan,” Jack said calmly. “Even if it’s just casual like you initially wanted, they would come after her. You’re absolutely correct that someone would want to use her to get to you. The key is to let it get to you and murder anyone who tries, then people will stop trying. Besides, she can stand up to each one of us in a fight, she’s not going to be an easy target.”

          “I’ll think about it,” Ryan huffed and rubbed his hands together slowly. “I’ll definitely everything you’ve said into account.”

          “Look at you Rye,” Geoff cooed. “All flustered and blushing like a love-sick teenager.”

          “Fuck off Geoff,” Ryan groaned. “I still have half a mind to kill you.”

          “Oh yeah,” Jack grinned wickedly at our boss. “What on earth did you do to upset Ryan?”

          “Nothing,” Geoff said quickly as he stood up. “Don’t worry about it. We have other stuff to talk about before we get to actual work today.”

          “Wait,” Gavin paused and looked at me. “Did you tell him about Geoff’s attempt at-”

          “Okay assholes! Listen up!” he exclaimed and clapped loudly to drown out Gavin as he changed the subject. “Here’s the plan for our next heist. Since the dickheads who shot Brie foiled our last attempt at some new weaponry, Brie has been kind enough to use her vendetta for good and has lined up another attempt.”

          “This one is on the docks, so they’re getting an overseas shipment,” I continued for Geoff as I rolled my eyes at him and gave them everything I know. “So it’ll probably be mostly automatic and assault weapons. I have no idea the quality or quantity. They used an impressive amount of dead end emails to transfer everything, and even the stuff I got from the heist the other day didn’t give me much more than a time, place, and approximate attendance count.”

          “It’s probably safe to say that they will still be on high alert after our previous attempt,” Geoff took over. “The number in attendance will be much higher, so this will be a six-person heist. It’ll take place two days from now, and just after nine at night so we’ll have the cover of dark on our side. Ryan and Jeremy; you’ll be in charge of overwatch. Get up in the ships’ rigging if you have to. The space is really open, so you just need to find the right vantage point.”

          The two men nodded and bumped fists without looking at each other.

          “Michael and Gav, you’re with me on the ground. We’ll wait until the delivery crew is out of the way before we step in, that way we have a few less people to deal with.”

          The Lads nodded and high-fived.

          “Jack, you’ll stay near the car to keep an eye on the entrance and so that we can get out, or have you jump in, quick.”

          “Can do sir!” she saluted but then looked at me. “What’s Brie doing?”

          “Staying home and not getting shot,” I spat back playfully, and she laughed. “But seriously, there’s no need for me. I’m not a good enough shot to matter and there aren’t any computers that you would need me to get into.”

          Ryan had returned to his full self while we discussed the next heist, and I could see the glimmer in his eyes as he was excited to get back to work without having stray worries clouding his mind.

          “Okay fuckheads,” Geoff grinned. “That’s all I have for today. Let’s all go and try to be normal again.”


	10. Ryan's Back

          “Brie!” I heard Gavin whine over my music.

          I pulled my headphones out and listened for more sounds of distress. There was a bird-like squawk and the sound of a fight, but no screaming or yelling.

          “Brie!” Gavin called out again, but his voice sounded choked.

          I huffed as I stood up and leisurely walked into the commons. When I entered, I shoved my hands in the pockets of my dress and sighed heavily as I saw Ryan sitting on top of Gavin with the poor lad in a chokehold.

          “Did he deserve it?” I asked Michael who was just watching from the couch.

          “I don’t know,” he shrugged as Gavin wriggled out of Ryan’s hold and gasped for air. “He called for me first, but I don’t feel like stepping in for him today.”

          “Micooo,” Gavin groaned as Ryan smiled wickedly and tried to restrain the wiggling man under him.

          “Listen man, it’s time to leave the nest,” Michael smiled. “This momma bird is kicking you out and now you gotta learn to fly.”

          “Brie,” the struggling man begged as he fought off Ryan’s attempts to wrap his hands around Gav’s neck. “Make him stop.”

          “I don’t know that I want to,” I smirked. “How do I know you don’t deserve it?”

          “I didn’t do shit!” Gav snapped.

          “That’s bullshit and you know it!” Ryan growled as he changed tactics and tried to control the lad by grabbing his hair.

          “What did he do?” I asked, sounding like a scolding mother as I addressed Ryan.

          “He told me I was getting soft,” Ryan snapped and Michael and I hissed in response.

          “I called you a softie because you went out of your way to get her favorite food for lunch!” Gavin yelped and finally managed to free himself from Ryan.

          “Ah, so he’s beating the shit out of you to assert dominance,” I nodded. “You deserve it. Now where the fuck are those tacos?”

          “Counter,” Ryan grunted as he lunged at the fleeing lad.

          “What’s the end game here hun?” I asked as I sat at the island and opened the takeout box, smiling as a cloud of steam rose from it.

          “What do you mean?” He huffed as he smushed Gavin’s face into the floor.

          “Like are you gonna do something special? Or just waiting for him to cry uncle?”

          “Uncle,” Ryan said.

          “Uncle! Uncle!” the Brit pled.

          “No. I don’t think you’ve learned your lesson yet,” Ryan sneered and Michael burst into laughter.

          “Do I smell tacos?” Jeremy asked as he stepped out of the armory.

          “My tacos,” I said and pretended to guard the box. “But they drowned them in queso upon my request, so if you want to grab the tortilla chips, go ahead.”

          “Not gonna ask questions about this?” Michael smirked and nodded towards the squabbling men who were rolling around on the floor.

          “I’m sure he deserved it,” Jeremy said simply, and Gavin whined indignantly.

          “He called Ryan soft,” I filled him in and the Bostonian hissed.

          “Kill him Ryan,” Jeremy egged the older man on. “Just like we said. Kill anyone who dares to call you soft.”

          “Jeremy!” Gavin gasped as Ryan threw a punch, intentionally stopping short so he could hear the man scream in terror.

          The door flew open and Jack stepped in, eyes wide because she heard Gavin’s scream in the hall outside and Geoff wasn’t too far behind.

          “What the hell is going on here?” Geoff snapped as he saw us just watching as Ryan beat up Gav.

          “He deserved it,” I repeated and took a bite out of my taco.

          “He called Rye _weak_ ,” Jeremy grinned.

          “God damnit Gavin,” Jack scolded.

          “I DIDN’T SAY THAT!” Gav wailed and was picked up by his shirt collar as Ryan stood.

          “Let him go Ryan,” Geoff chuckled. “I’m sure the little shit has learned his lesson.”

          “Why can Brie tease him without consequence, but I get shoved to the ground like an annoying sibling?” Gavin huffed as he was released.

          “Because you _are_ an annoying sibling,” We all said in unison and he groaned.

          “Besides, I get a very different reaction to teasing,” I smirked as Ryan joined me at the counter and took a big bite out of the other end of my taco.

          “Different people require different punishments,” Ryan said through his mouthful of food and I rolled my eyes as he laughed at Michael’s exaggerated gagging.

          “God, it’s good to have you back buddy,” Jeremy smiled and clapped Ryan’s shoulder.

          “It’s good to be back,” Ryan smiled as people huddled around the takeout box full of cheese and chips.

          Lunch was when it was most obvious that the Fake AH Crew was more than just a crew. As everyone dug into my leftover cheese and whatever they brought for themselves, the family dynamic was clear. The lads teased and taunted each other while making bets and discussing what wild things they had done on their last string of robberies. Ryan listened to their gloating and would occasionally interject with his own story or call out one of them out on a lie. Geoff and Jack listened quietly and provided color commentary as they looked over the whole bunch like proud parents.

_Your crew is your family._

          All crews lived by that code, but none ever got this close to a real family. Most were run like mafias where you protected the family because they were just that: a family that needed to stick together for survival.

          The speculation to outsiders was that the Fake AH Crew worked on a basis of mutually assured destruction. They all wanted to wreak havoc on the city, no other crew would let them, so they stuck together for maximum chaos. While that wasn’t too far off, their bond went deeper than that. I watched Jeremy and Michael start arm wrestling, and it was clear that they didn’t protect each other _just_ to survive. They stuck together because they loved each other.

          My first crew was a disaster. Four people who actually hated each other but stuck it out because we were all we had. My ex, the leader, controlled everyone with an iron fist, and once I was free I could tell that I had gotten the brunt of it.

          Suddenly I felt like an outsider looking in, like I wasn’t a part of the family yet and shouldn’t be here. Like I was tainted by my past and didn’t deserve to have a happy family. A pang of anxiety was starting to grip my heart when Ryan absentmindedly wrapped an arm around my shoulders while he coached the two wrestlers on proper posture and technique. His subconscious touch was all it took to chase away my concerns, and it made me feel like I _was_ a member of the family. If he was the ‘weird uncle’, I guess that made me the ‘cool aunt.’

          “You ready for the heist tonight?” I heard Jack ask Geoff quietly behind me and I remembered something that had come across my stream of information this morning.

          “That reminds me,” I cut Geoff off and turned away from Ryan’s arm, bringing his attention to me. “I got word of some things that you need to hear.”

          “I’ve gotten a few warnings from my sources,” I explained after Geoff gave me a nod. “The word on the street is that the shipment is small. Two crates tops. Also, there’s talk of a ‘special guest’.”

          “What the hell does that mean?” Jack snorted.

          “I don’t know,” I shrugged. “I got the tip early this morning and haven’t found a clue as to who or what it could be. Just a lot of whispers of a guest.”

          “This just got interesting,” Ryan hummed happily, and I couldn’t help but smirk at the excited twinkle in his eyes.

          “I don’t like it,” Geoff mumbled.

          “I don’t either, but there also haven’t been any signs that it could be something big and dangerous,” I added. “There haven’t been any missile purchases, no jets or tanks are missing from Zancudo, and my informants with Pegasus and Mors Mutual haven’t had any policies upped, checked on, or bought for private vehicles that we would be afraid of.”

          “You really do cover all the bases,” Michael said with an impressed huff.

          “All possibilities must be considered in this line of work,” I warned. “If you don’t, you end up dead.”

          “You still wanna go through with it Geoff?” Jack muttered, and our boss went quiet as he weighed his options.

          “Where did you learn all this stuff Brie?” Jeremy asked while we waited for the final verdict.

          “I started college for computer programming but fell on hard times before I could graduate. Desperate for money, I turned to crime,” I said as I turned back to the others and Ryan replaced his arm. “Some friends I made at school taught me all the hacker goodies and eventually I got good enough that I attracted the attention of a crew. They needed a new guy after the last one bit the dust, and I used their database to kickstart my own.”

          “Why did you leave?” Michael asked.

          “There was a big fight with the Boss and the crew split up afterwards,” I said flatly, and Ryan’s eyes squinted as he put some puzzle pieces together.

          Instead of pressing, he gave my shoulder a tight squeeze as he pulled me closer to him. I smiled thankfully, and he gave me a small nod.

          “What crew?” Michael continued to question.

          “No one you would know,” I shrugged.

          “Try me,” he challenged, but Geoff cut him off and saved me from having to stall.

          “We’re going to continue the heist, but with a slightly altered goal” our Boss confirmed, and everyone nodded. “We’ll keep aiming for those weapons, but if it’s a small crate and there aren’t many people there, we just might fuck them up a bit for hurting Brie.”

          “You don’t have to do that Geoff,” I blushed.

          “Nonsense,” he shook his head. “We do this every time someone gets hurt during a heist. We gotta make them pay for getting one of us, especially if they got out relatively unharmed.”

          “What about the guest?” I asked.

          “Not a fuckin’ clue,” the older man shrugged and I rolled my eyes. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”

          “You picked the wrong crew,” Ryan teased as I stiffened. “We thrive on chaos and spontaneity.”

          “I know,” I sighed heavily. “Doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

          Ryan pulled me out of my seat and into his lap, and I gasped and pursed my lips as he leaned in to my ear.

          “I can come back there and give you something I know you’ll like,” he whispered evilly.

          I gasped and blinked a few times as I glanced around to see if anyone had heard him, but they had stepped away a bit as soon as he pulled me into his lap. He had been trying to keep all his romantic advances limited to home, and anytime he got an itch at work he would never go farther than making out and fondling me through my clothes. Which was why I was utterly flabbergasted by what he seemed to be suggesting.

          “Ryan,” I gasped, lowering my voice to a quiet whisper. “We are at _work_.”

          “I know,” he grinned as one of his hands dipped low on my back. “But I have nothing to do until the heist tonight, so I was gonna wander to your office anyway.”

          “What exactly are you suggesting?” I asked for clarification just in case I was jumping to conclusions.

          “Exactly what you think,” he murmured, and my heart jumped into my throat. “You just look so pretty in that dress, and don’t think I didn’t notice that you’re not wearing tights or leggings.”

          “Ryan,” I gasped again, and my mouth hung open as words escaped me.

          “That’s what Brie gets instead of being shoved to the floor Gavin,” Geoff said, and I became very aware of how hot my face and chest felt.

          “Looks a whole lot like he _offered_ to shove her to the floor,” Jeremy jeered as I jumped out of Ryan’s lap and took a few steps away from him.

          “You son of a bitch,” I hissed as he watched me with a familiar look.

          It was the same look he had given me when he first pushed me to my desk, and the same look he had as he stalked to the security room at the bank. The same playfully malicious stare that had pinned me to the floor as he grabbed at me through the broken door to my office. Ryan _was_ back, and he was making me dance for him.

          “What?” he asked with a Cheshire grin. “Do you not want me to come back and hang out with you while you work?”

          “You _motherfucker_ ,” I scowled as the rest of the Fakes snickered around me and reached into my pocket.

          “Go ahead. Pull your knife on me,” he smirked as my fingers wrapped around the handle. “ _See what happens._ ”

          I took a deep breath and locked eyes with him. Either I didn’t pull the knife and walked away with some of my dignity, or I did pull it and had my ass handed to me. Something told me that either way he would be carrying me to my office, so I might as well have fun with it.

          The room fell silent as the blade clicked into place and I continued to stare him down. I twirled the blade in my hand and he gave me a patronizing pout which only made me want to beat him more. I took a big step forward to goad him into moving and he fell for it. I had looked into his fighting style before I joined the Fakes, and my time with them had only made him easier to observe. He liked to catch people off guard and use their momentum against them, but not this time.

          In one smooth movement he pushed himself out of the chair and closed the gap between us, hand outstretched to grab the hand holding the knife, but I had anticipated this and stepped to the side.

          “How ‘bout a taste of your own medicine _Vagabond?”_ I hissed as I hooked my foot around his leg and swept it out from under him.

          He fell to one knee and landed hard enough that I heard his breath hitch, but I didn’t pause to see if he was okay. I put my foot on the hip that was bent and holding him up and kicked him over as hard as I could. While he didn’t fall over all the way, it did knock him to his hands and knees.

          “You must be going easy on me,” I teased. “Or maybe you have gone soft.”

          The giggles of the Fakes turned into horrified gasps as Ryan shot up and picked me up off the ground by my throat.

          “Ryan stop it right n-!” Jack barked but was cut off by my hysterical laughter as I weakly kicked my legs in the air.

          “You’re pushing you luck Sweetpea,” Ryan snarled as he carefully adjusted his grip to make up for my kicking so that he didn’t crush my windpipe.

          “Okay,” I giggled, and he lowered me to his eye level. “You’re not soft. Just predictable.”

          His face twitched, and a brief flash of rage darkened his eyes as I continued to laugh despite his tightening grip on my neck.

          “You’re seriously twisted Brie,” Gavin grimaced.

          “Not really,” I smiled. “Well, yeah. A little bit. But in this case, that’s not entirely it.”

          “Laughter is just my response to fear,” I explained as Ryan set me down. “My natural reaction to being scared is to laugh.”

          The rest of the Fakes shook their heads in disbelief as Ryan lifted my chin to make sure he hadn’t really hurt me. I made sure to clear my throat so that he could see that everything was okay.

          “We should have known he wouldn’t kill her,” Geoff snorted.

          “On the contrary Geoff. I’ve asked him to kill me if I ever need to,” I grinned, and eyes widened in horror before snapping to Ryan.

          “She doesn’t need to yet,” the hitman shrugged with a sly smile.

          “You mean to fucking tell me you told _Vagabond_ to kill you when he deems it fit?” Michael giggled.

          “I do believe I told him to kill me if he _needed_ to,” I said and straightened out my dress. “As in if I go rogue, or if it comes down to a case of ‘me or the crew.’”

          “Got plans to go rogue?” Ryan teased.

          “Wouldn’t you like to know,” I winked and made my way to my office.

          I was at my office door when I heard Ryan speak up.

          “Well, that sounds like probable cause. I’m gonna go make sure the only ‘no good’ she’s up to is in our favor.”

          “No sex! Some of us like to sit on that couch and chill with Brie,” Geoff said quickly as Ryan followed me and I heard the tattooed man mutter something about not believing he had to say that.

          There was almost no time between him locking the door and me being shoved up onto the empty part of my desk.

          “Geoff said no sex,” I groaned quietly as he hiked up my skirt and ripped my panties off anyway.

          “Geoff said no sex on the couch,” Ryan hissed before pulling me in for a rough and passionate kiss.

          “That’s not what he said,” I panted between kisses and tangled my hands in his hair while he fought with his belt.

          “That’s what I heard,” he grinned before carefully wrapping his fingers around my neck again. “Now let’s make sure no one hears anything from you.”


	11. Skeletons

It was about six when Geoff slowly opened the door and cautiously checked to make sure the coast was clear. I snorted at him from my desk where I was quietly working while Ryan slept on the couch.

“It’s been like five hours Geoff,” I giggled as he stepped into the room and shook his head at me.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he could keep it up for that long,” Geoff smiled. “But you’ll understand when I say no more at work, right?”

“Absolutely,” I nodded, and he seemed to relax. “He’s usually content with some heavy petting if he gets needy while we’re here.”

“I also hope you’ll understand why we need to burn that couch now,” he teased.

“We didn’t do it on the couch,” I said in mock indignity. “We took your request into consideration and fucked on my desk.”

“I appreciate it,” he huffed and watched Ryan. “He usually out that hard afterwards?”

I looked back at Ryan who was laying on his stomach, one arm dangling off the edge while he snored into the other. I smiled as I saw him totally relaxed, a look that went away almost as soon as he regained consciousness.

“I honestly don’t know,” I sighed. “I’m usually asleep before he is.”

“You could almost forget he’s a murderer when he looks like this,” Geoff said almost sadly. “We thought his ability to love died years ago.”

“What do you mean?” I asked as I found a stopping point for the day. “He had lady problems?”

“Men actually,” Geoff said, and I raised an eyebrow. “He hasn’t told you?”

“He’s told me that he’s been with men before, yes,” I nodded.

“But no one specific?”

“No, but I wouldn’t be good at my job if I didn’t have the information to make an educated guess,” I sighed and watched some hair fall across Ryan’s cheek.

“I suppose that’s true,” Geoff paused. “When the kid left, Ryan was devastated to say the least.”

“Twenty-three kills in thirty days,” I nodded. “Believe me Geoff, people waited with baited breath when we caught wind that the R&R Connection would be making its final run through the city. Didn’t realize it was more than just a parting friend.”

“You couldn’t tell that they were seeing each other?”

“No,” I shook my head and listened to how peaceful the hitman’s snores sounded. “If anyone suspected it, they didn’t put the information anywhere that could be found. We knew that they were close, they worked too well with each other to not be. Were they serious?”

“No,” he huffed. “They were casual, but he was still losing his best friend, and it didn’t make it any easier on him when it came time to say good-bye. I don’t think the plane had left Los Santos airspace before the first kill was made.”

“That’s how we knew Ryan was dealing with something big this time around,” Geoff said. “He took twenty kills in the three weeks you were apart. But because neither of you would talk about it, there was nothing we could do to help.”

“If they were casual, why did you think his ability to love had died?” I asked.

“Because it was the closest he had ever come to it, and he was so out of it for so long, when he did come back to normal we could tell that something had changed in him.”

“Why do you think he’s so concerned about my safety?” I pondered as I took in the way his fingertips twitched like he was holding something.

“I have no idea,” Geoff sighed. “Our best guess is that he just isn’t confident in your ability to kill if needed. Sure, he knows you can fight, but he doubts that you can go the distance if you have to. Beyond that, we don’t know why he would care so much for your safety.”

I could feel my chest tightening and tears welling up in my eyes as I watched Ryan sleep. I remembered the look he would give me when he would say something remotely close to an affirmation of love. For a brief moment, he looked terrified that it was all going to disappear.

“Brie?” Geoff whispered, and I inhaled sharply as a tear rolled down my cheek.

“I think he’s just afraid of losing that feeling again,” I muttered. “He had to watch it fly away, and even if it was only casual, he doesn’t want to go through that again. It also explains his paranoia about me getting taken away or having to watch me die.”

“Oh?” Geoff hummed.

“Think about it. It was only casual before and look at how hurt he was when all BrownMan did was go back home to Liberty City. Now Ryan might be experiencing actual love, and I’m not likely to leave the city for any reason, so what’s the next logical place his scared mind would jump to?”

“That you’re taken from him or killed,” Geoff nodded. “God damnit Rye.”

“And you’re right. I’m absolute garbage with anything larger than 9mm, so that only adds to his fear.”

“Do me a favor,” Geoff smiled. “Don’t go getting kidnapped or killed. I don’t want to see what happens if you do.”

“I can’t make any promises,” I sighed and rolled my chair over to Ryan. “Though I can’t see any problems coming up anytime soon.”

“What about later?”

“I have some skeletons in the closet I need to clean up,” I muttered as I brushed the hair out of the sleeping man’s face and smiled as his twitching stopped at my touch. “Once I’m ready to take them out, I’ll let everyone know.”

“Brie?” Geoff warned. “What kind of baggage have you dumped onto us?”

I suddenly became very aware of Geoff’s eyes on my back and I shuddered as a fear crept back into my mind for the first time in five years.

“Nothing major,” I lied. “I just need to get ducks in a row.”

Before Geoff could ask more questions, I cupped Ryan’s cheek and gently squeezed. Ryan inhaled sharply as my action pulled him out of his dream.

“Hey,” I smiled sweetly as his eyes fluttered open and focused on me.

“Hey,” he smiled back before stretching the sleep out of his limbs. “What time is it?”

“Time to finish getting ready so we can go,” Geoff said and playfully knocked Ryan’s foot off the arm of the couch. “You’ve been asleep all afternoon, so you get to pack all the weapons.”

“Aye aye captain,” the hitman yawned. “You could have woken me up sooner.”

“They were afraid of walking in on something they don’t want to see,” I teased.

“We’ve been done for like, four hours,” Ryan frowned as he looked at his watch. “Or at least I know I laid down around two.”

“I already told Brie, no more of that,” Geoff reiterated. “I shouldn’t be afraid of walking in here.”

“I’ll keep my hands to myself,” Ryan sighed but I could see the deception in his eyes.

I looked up to Geoff and he just shook his head.

“How did I get here?” He grumbled. “All I wanted was to start a crew so that I could make a living and be semi comfortable. Now I’ve got three children in the kitchen trying to fit as many ice cubes in their mouths as they can, and two horny teens trying to fuck in the back room while my ‘wife’ is in the armory packing for our heist.”

“There was no ‘trying’,” I smirked as Ryan sat up and kissed my cheek.

“You’re ‘trying’ my patience,” Geoff snapped but the corners of his mouth pulled up into a smile.

“Ryan,” I gasped as he pulled me out of my chair and into his lap. “What did he just say?”

“The heist could get dangerous tonight,” he pouted, and I rolled my eyes as Geoff groaned. “I just want to hold you just in case I have to spend the night in the infirmary.”

“Ryan,” I huffed and tried to pull myself out of his grip but struggling only made him hold tighter. “All I’ve been able to find is that the ‘special guest’ is a person, and unless that person is actually twelve small, trained assassins in a trench coat you’ll be fucking fine.”

“If you say so,” he snickered before throwing me to the side and standing up.

“You’re a dick,” I giggled and kicked at him as he walked away with Geoff.

I had time to finish up some encrypting before calling it a day and sitting in the kitchen as the Fakes double checked their weapons and body armor. The room was quiet except for some idle chatter, but for the most part everyone was focusing on getting into the headspace for the heist. I was on my tablet and checking the last few leads I was chasing on the special guest that would be joining them.

At least I was trying to, but Ryan was standing in front of me, sniper in its carrying case and slung across his back as he adjusted his iconic leather jacket. His eyes stared off into space as he checked his pockets, making sure that he had extra clips and magazines as well at adjusting the Kevlar armor that was sewn into the lining. He pulled his ponytail out, and I felt my heart flutter as he held the tie in his teeth while he ran his hands through his hair and gathered the sandy strands back into their place at the base of his skull.

I shook my head as I pulled myself out of my trance and sighed at how smitten I was with him. Jeremy gently elbowed me and gave me a knowing wink as I glared out of the corner of my eye.

“You saw nothing,” I hissed and he laughed quietly, but my tablet pinged before he could tease me.

“Oh! Geoff!” I gasped as I opened the email I received. “Oh, Geoff.”

“What is it?” the man asked as he buttoned his dress shirt over the body armor. “It’s a little late to back out now, but what are we facing?”

“Geoff,” I paused. “It came from one of their dummy emails. Directly.”

“What does it say?” he said seriously.

“‘It’s time that old friends meet again.’ That’s all it says,” I read, and everyone looked to each other for ideas.

“We’re walking into a set-up,” Jack warned. “Or they found out that we’re targeting them tonight and are trying to intimidate us into dropping it.”

“Either is possible,” I muttered as I confirmed that it was one of this crew’s proxy accounts that they use to transfer money and information. “But if it was a set-up, why warn us? I guess the real question is, do you have any old friends that you should be afraid of?”

“What do you know about this crew?” Geoff ordered and I got to work accessing my files remotely.

“The Lancers: a mid-level crew that specializes in weapon running,” I read from their file. “That makes sense as to why their broker was hiding in a self-defense start-up, it makes a good excuse as to why they need to purchase bigger weapons.”

“Major players?” Geoff continued.

“Their boss it the most notable person. His codename is,” I paused as my heart dropped. “ _Coins._ ”

“Coins? Why does that sound familiar?” Jack hummed as I became light headed.

_How could I forget that Coins was the Lancers’ boss?_

“You took a hit out on him five years ago,” I coughed and tried to make my trembling look like anxiety and not terror. “Him and his previous crew actually.”

“Oh yeah,” Geoff grinned and it only made my stomach drop more. “He was a part of this punk ass crew that we tried to take out when Jack and I first started. They had stolen from the wrong people, so the bigger fish hired us to bring them the little fishes’ heads. What were they called? Something dumb as fuck.”

“Tarot,” I hummed and just kept staring at the screen. “His old crew was called Tarot. They stole money from the Sharks, so they called you two in to do their dirty work.”

“Yeah,” Geoff huffed. “That refusal to kill for themselves is why they don’t exist anymore.”

“What happened to the hit?” Ryan snorted. “It seems unlike you to leave a job incomplete.”

“We showed up at their hideout and found the leader already dead, skull beaten to a pulp, and the rest of the crew was gone. They disappeared without a trace.”

Geoff and Jack winced as they remembered the bloody scene and I tried to sigh quietly to steady my breathing, but it came out shuddering.

“Brie?” Ryan muttered and reached out to hold my face. “What’s wrong?”

His hand felt like it was burning, and I realized that the color had drained from my face as my blood ran cold with fear. I laid my hand on his and sighed again.

“I just. I don’t have a good feeling about this,” I whispered, and he raised an eyebrow as he looked over to Geoff.

“It’ll be _fine_ Brie,” the older man cheered. “New crew aside, this guy is no threat to us. He’s just trying to scare us into backing down.”

“Let’s go fuck this shithead up,” Michael barked, and the lads cheered as they made for the door.

“You think the hit is still up on them?” Ryan grinned. “If it is, I bet we could ask Coins a few questions and make some money if it is.”

“If the Sharks are gone, I doubt anyone is upholding the hit,” I mumbled as I reread the email. “But I’ll look into it and try to find what I can on the remaining crew members.”

“Hey,” Ryan cooed as he pulled my chin up to look at me. “We’ll be fine. If Geoff and Jack are okay with it, we’ll be totally okay.”

I just nodded weakly as I tired to forget that he just offered to go hunting for this dead crew.

“Brie,” he murmured as he took my face in his hands before kissing me softly and making me want to burst into tears. “Here, I’ll come over to your apartment after it’s all said and done, and I’ll tell you everything that happened. Will that make you feel better?”

I nodded again and if I wasn’t so scared, his sweet smile might have made me feel better. He gave me another kiss and they all left teasing Ryan for so openly showing affection, but all I could do was stare at the email address that was now taunting me for not seeing this sooner.

_lookingforwands_

As soon as I heard the van leave, I took off down the hall to my office and shut down all my computers. It was going to be a pain in the morning to get everything loaded back up, but I couldn’t risk it. Not until Ryan told me _everything_ that happened tonight, and I had a better idea of what’s going on. I was out the door as soon as I was sure no one could access my files at the hideout, and sped home to do the same with my computer. I didn’t have any of my important hard drives plugged in, or out where anyone could see them, but I needed to get home and make sure.

Nothing could have prepared me for the scene I walked in on. My apartment was trashed. Furniture was ripped up and turned over, all my decorations were either smashed or torn to pieces, and I could see my refrigerator sticking out of the shallow end of my pool outside. I choked back tears as I sprinted to my computer room.

The sight of my destroyed set up made me sob and I frantically threw up the rug over where I hid my most important files: Everything I had on Ryan, Geoff, and _me._ I let out a long gasp of relief as I saw the safe still in its place under the trapdoor and untouched. I carefully retrieved the hard drives and shoved them into a backpack that would be taken to work in the morning and hidden somewhere in the armory. I shot Ryan a text message before going to investigate my room.

_Me: My apartment is a disaster and it’s making me feel worse. I’m going to head over to your place and play with Edgar._

His phone was probably off by now, but at least he’d see it when they stopped by the hideout after the heist to drop things off. I whimpered as I flicked on the lights and saw all the strips of fabric and pillow feathers that were strewn across my floor. My closet doors were off their hinges and all that was left of my wardrobe was torn scraps that were thrown everywhere. I sifted through the mess and managed to find an outfit to change into now, and one to wear to work tomorrow.

My stomach dropped as I thought of having to explain this twice: once to Ryan tonight, and again in the morning to the other Fakes. I thought this was all behind me, but the skeletons had sprung from my closet and destroyed everything I had worked for. I was mulling over how to best go about dealing with this when I noticed a note laying on my bed, and my hands shook as I took the note and the hat it was resting on.

_I’ve finally found you Wands. It’s been too long. Wear this to the docks tonight so I recognize you. I’ll see you soon._

_-Coins_

The note crumpled in my fist as I stared down at one of the many beanies I had left behind the night I ran away.


	12. Like Sand Flowing Between Fingers

          I pulled my black and pink beanie over my head as I closed the door to the van and looked around. Jack had done a good job hiding it off the road and behind some shipping containers, but I knew their methods and found it with only a little difficulty. I checked to make sure that my bike was hidden alongside the van and had tucked my backpack of hard drives away under the driver’s seat in the van.

          I didn’t stop at Ryan’s, as much as I wanted to, because I didn’t know if I was being followed or tracked somehow. It was bad enough that I was going to have to dump this onto him tonight, I didn’t need to draw enemies to his home. So, I put on my old peacoat and pulled my bike out of storage. If I was going to have to face this again, I might as well pull all the stops and maybe I could destroy it all once and for all.

          I found my coat when I retrieved my bike, zipped up in a suit bag and while it didn’t look like it, it _smelled_ like it had been in storage for five years. The ride here had aired it out, but I was still greeted by its musty odor when I turned my head to watch my back as I made my way through Elysian Island to the section that I knew the meeting was taking place.

          I was surprised by how comfortably it fit me, I was very thin when I wore this last, but it fit me like a glove and I found myself considering washing it and making it a regular part of my wardrobe again. I silently climbed up in top of the shipping containers and nimbly jumped from stack to stack as I approached the drop off point, making sure to stay in the shadows. The last thing I needed was for Jeremy or Ryan to see me from their nests and shoot me.

          I slowed to a crawl as I grew near the cluster of spotlights that must have been the meeting site. I saw a container that was open on both ends and one container off the ground, so I slipped inside and crept to the end that was open to the criminals below. The doors were open in just the right way that I could sit just inside the opening and watch from above without being totally obvious. It looked like all but one of the Lancers were there and my heart sank as I saw Coins for the first time in five years.

          I had been keeping tabs on him, more to keep him at a distance from me until I could locate Cups, and he looked more intimidating than his file made him out to be. His brown eyes looked like black holes from my vantage point and his dark skin was covered in tattoos, most of which were new to me. He was about Ryan’s height and built like Jeremy: stocky and broad shouldered just like I remembered but he held himself with a familiar air of superiority that made my stomach churn. I didn’t stick around when he and Cups had come back and caught me in the act, but I couldn’t see them taking it well. Coins had always idolized Swords.

          “I know you’re out there,” Coins called out, his rich baritone echoing through the stacks of metal, and I was about to get up when I heard movement from the land side of the platform.

          “Good to finally meet the crew who’s really been a thorn in my side for the last few months,” Coins jeered as four familiar figures walked into view.

          Geoff had brought Jack down with him, Michael, and Gavin, which was why the van was hidden and unguarded. They all looked around the area cautiously, and if any of them saw me, they didn’t show it.

          “We’re the thorn?” Geoff scoffed. “It was your info broker that burned us and owed us money. Everything on that computer belonged to the Fakes with how much he owed me.”

          “It goes _much_ farther than that,” Coins smiled wickedly as the Fakes looked at him incredulously. “And judging by that look, you have no idea what I’m talking about. _Perfect._ Anyone get eyes on our ‘special guest’?”

          One of his boys pulled out a walkie and repeated the question. After a few seconds of silence, the man looked to Coins and shook his head.

          “I’m sure they’re here,” Coins hummed in irritation. “Keep looking.”

          “So, what the fuck are we doing here if it’s not to take weapons and shoot you with them for hurting Sweetpea?” Michael blurted out and it was clear that he was getting antsy.

          “Oh, we’ll get to that,” Coins grinned, and the four Fakes looked at each other nervously. “But let me explain some things while we wait. After you listen, you can have everything in this box.”

          He turned and rapped his fist on the top of a wooden crate that was sitting behind him. Geoff wrung the grip of his AR nervously but stood firm, and the other three followed his lead.

          “You became a thorn when you sicced Vagabond on my boy Cups,” Coins began and my blood ran cold at the mention of the member of Tarot that I couldn’t locate.

          “The name doesn’t ring a bell,” Geoff shook his head and did his best to appear bored.

          “Because he didn’t go by that codename, that was from our previous crew. He changed it when we… _disbanded_ the last one,” Coins scowled. “He started going by Hermit afterwards.”

          “So, _you_ were the one hunting for our records,” Geoff nodded. “I’ll send Sweetpea your regards. I’m sure she’ll _love_ to hear from the boys who tried to kidnap her.”

          Cups was the informant who I ratted out when he started snooping around for Ryan and Geoff’s information. I remembered Ryan saying that he cursed me with his dying breaths and I realized that he probably knew who I was all along. I cursed myself for not looking further into ‘Hermit’ than seeing what crew he was affiliated with. This whole situation was reminding me how lazy I had gotten as I shot up in renown, and I made a mental note to make changes so that I _never_ slipped up like this again.

          “When Cups told me that he knew of a broker who knew pretty much everything for the right price, I considered trying to bring them into the Lancers,” Coins shrugged but I could see his jaw twitch in anger. “Besides ‘Sweetpea’ sounded familiar to me, and I wanted to know more about her. But then she sold Cups out and led him to slaughter.”

          “Vagabond assures me that he doesn’t slaughter anymore,” Geoff smirked. “He stopped looking at people as cattle a few years ago.”

          I couldn’t help but to huff quietly at Geoff’s comment. Ryan _absolutely_ still viewed cops as cattle waiting to be killed, but I appreciated his attempt to make Ryan out to be the monster he wants the world to believe that he is. I knew he was listening over comms, so I imagined he was saying the same thing in Geoff’s ear.

          “All we wanted was to get your information so we could use it as blackmail, nothing _too_ awful, and she turned around and tipped you off. So, I sent my boys out to grab her,” Coins started again, ignoring Geoff. “We only could get a vague description of her from Cups’ files, but I still had the nagging feeling that I should know Sweetpea. When they gave me her description, I finally realized why ‘Sweetpea’ rang a bell.

          “So we’ve been planting information to draw you out since your raid on Anderson’s computer,” Coins continued with a superior smile and I was shaking with rage. “I saw those security photo’s and there was no doubting who she was. What kind of lenses was the man with her wearing by the way? They refracted light back into the cameras, so we couldn’t see more than his smokin’ hot nerd outfit.”

          As much as I wanted to laugh at Coins’ comment on Ryan’s body, I was trembling with rage as all the pieces came together. I had been playing like a fucking harp and had brought the crew down with me. Now Geoff would definitely consider killing me for a bounty.

          “Don’t ask me. I’m not totally sure who that guy was,” Geoff lied. “Sweetpea said he was a friend. _How do you know Sweetpea?”_

          “Oh, me and Sweetpea go way back,” Coins growled and I fought to keep myself from jumping out of the container to silence him as best I could, but it was bad enough that this was happening and I didn’t need to add to it by needlessly throwing myself into danger.

          “In fact, the last time I saw her was five years ago,” the man grinned and I felt myself finally go numb as I resigned to what was happening. “She went by Wands then and was in the process of beating our boss Swords’ brains into the carpet.”

          He stopped to let that settle in and in the back of my mind, I could hear the sound of an aluminum baseball bat ringing against the floor.

          “You mull that over,” Coins smirked while the four Fakes looked at each other in shock. “Any news on our ‘special guest’?”

          There was another pause and the man with the walkie shook his head again.

          “Impossible,” Coins snapped, his cool composure breaking. “I had them tear her apartment to ribbons and leave behind a note. That alone is enough to draw Wands out. She was always a vindictive little cunt.”

          “You mean to tell me you pulled us all the way out here, going as far as to create a massive plot to lead us to this moment, _just_ to tell us that Sweetpea has a dark history?” Geoff huffed, but I could see his anger from here and I knew that Coins would see it too.

          “I know you and Jack were the ones who were sent to kill us,” the larger man spat. “And I’m _positive_ she does too. That’s why she decided to suck up to you. Fucking whore saw an opportunity to take us out while staying safe behind her shield of Fakes.”

          I couldn’t stop my laughter as my anxiety and fear from the situation came to a head and Coins’ insane accusation further made me realize how sloppy I had gotten. I didn’t even notice that they were involved in all the things we were doing, I should have but I fucked up and now he thought I was _hunting_ them and using the Fakes as dogs.

          All eyes snapped up to me as I trembled with hysterical laughter, and once I could see straight again I saw the pure rage in Geoff and Jack’s eyes.

_I was going to die tonight._

          My brain jumped to the conclusion, but I didn’t have the sanity left to argue with it. If Coins didn’t take me out before I left the docks, Geoff might have me killed for royally fucking up like this, or Ryan would kill me for keeping something like this from him. A part of me wanted to die. I had spent the last five years desperately trying to escape Tarot and the horrors Swords had put me through as his ‘subordinate’, and now it was all coming back to rip me and my life apart. What more could I do?

          “I knew you would show up,” Coins sneered.

          “How could I pass up the opportunity to catch up with an old friend?” I snapped, my voice flowing with venom as I hopped out of the shipping container and approached the scowling man.

          “Especially with the invitation you left me,” I growled as I ripped the beanie off my head and threw it at him.

          “I had to go to extremes to pull you out from behind your firing squad,” He spat as he towered over me. “You always were too afraid to pull the trigger yourself.”

          “Tell that to Swords,” I hissed, and the man stepped forward to hit me but Coins stopped as the air was filled with the sounds of readying guns.

          “If anyone is going to kill her tonight, it’s fucking gonna be me!” Geoff snarled as he aimed his gun at Coins.

          “It’s cute that you think I gave enough of a shit about you and Cups to plot your death,” I grinned as all inhibition left me. I had totally lost control: of the situation and of myself. “But the sad reality is that I got lazy and didn’t look into where ‘Hermit’ had his roots, and then didn’t think twice when I saw your name pop up on the radar.”

          “Bullshit!” Coins roared. “Wands not looking for all possible outcomes? What could possibly have made you fuck up that much?”

          “I’ve had a lot on my plate!” I shouted. “Almost getting kidnapped and having to readjust to crew life made me a little distracted.”

          “Sweetpea,” Geoff warned as I did my best to intimidate Coins.

          “Listen to your fuck toy,” Coins hissed. “Or I’ll tell him what happened to the last boss to love you.”

          “‘Love’ me?” I laughed loudly and ignored his comment about Geoff. “Swords didn’t love me and you fucking know it. You stood by and watched the whole damn train wreck!”

          “He was a rough lover,” Coins sniffed. “Not his fault you couldn’t take it.”

          “He beat me!” I trembled and my pitch dropped as my rage was reignited by his flippant referral to my abuse. “He locked me in that damn room and only came in when he wanted a guaranteed fuck! And you just stood by and watched! You and Cups let him use me!”

          “You agreed to it!”

          “I agreed to a normal, if a little rough, relationship! Not to be used like a sex toy!” I stepped closer as years of anger and fear broke through the barriers I had hidden them behind years ago. “Hell, he treated his _actual_ sex toys better than me! At least they got cleaned afterwards! He used my low self-esteem to manipulate me into believing that it was normal! That he was treating me exactly how he should be! _How the fuck could you just stand there and watch him ruin me? How are you surprised that I snapped like I did?”_

          “Swords had gotten me through so much shit! I was more than willing to turn a blind eye to what he did to you!” Coins glowered. “You were nothing. You were supposed to just be a temporary solution until we could get enough power to replace you with someone competent, but he like how much he could control you and paid the price for it.”

          “He didn’t pay enough for what he did to me!” I screamed. “I could have beat his corpse all fucking night and it still wouldn’t have been enough!”

          “You deserved it!” Coins spat. “We were golden until you showed up and started telling us what to do! You needed to be put into your place!”

          “I’ll put you in your place right beside him!” I threatened.

          “Sweetpea!” Geoff barked and I shook as I turned my head to him. “Enough! Get your ass over here!”

          I obediently walked over to the three awestruck Fakes as Geoff addressed Coins, who was seething as much as I was.

          “I have half a mind to kill you and your boys,” Geoff threatened and all the Lancers held up their guns. “But clearly this isn’t about our crews and a few computer files, so I’m not going to risk me and mine. Unless you have more to talk with Sweetpea about, I think our meeting is over.”

          “You still need your crate,” Coins said through gritted teeth, and I immediately distrusted anything that could be in it.

          Coins calmly walked to the crate and used a crowbar to pop the top open.

          “This is to make up for your ruined closet,” he hissed as he tipped the crate open.

          Gavin took three steps back as he tried not to throw up at the clothes stained with blood that tumbled out of the crate. Tears started flowing as soon as I recognized my old clothes and some of the outfits Swords had dressed me up in.

          “Take these home with you,” Coins cooed. “Maybe your new screw will like them as much as Swords did.”

          “You son of a bitch!” I shrieked and lunged at him with my knife drawn, but Michael and Jack caught me before I could get into any real trouble.

          “Go! Before she hurts herself,” Geoff snapped as Michael strong armed me to walk away.

           “I didn’t even get to shoot someone,” Michael griped as he struggled to push me towards the exit.

          “If you’re lucky, I’ll let you shoot Sweetpea,” Geoff snarled as he roughly grabbed my arm just under the shoulder and practically threw me in front of them as we turned our backs to the Lancers.

          “I’ll see you around Sweetpea!” Coins crooned.

          “Everyone back to the van,” Geoff hissed quietly into his mic, and his eyes closed slowly before pulling the headset out and holding it out to me.

          I grit my teeth and snatched it out of his hand. For the first time tonight, I knew what was coming.

          “You’re in deep shit, you know that right?” Ryan’s low growl rang through my ear and, despite the anger in his voice, I felt my rage and confusion ebb slightly.

          “I know that very well,” I hissed as I started shaking.

          “And not just because you got lazy and let the situation slip from your hands. You’re punishing yourself enough for that. I know you are,” Ryan continued. “But do you have any idea how fucked you would have been if you actually stabbed him? They have a sniper out there somewhere, I saw his scope flicker a while ago, and there are probably another four people hidden among the containers. All you have is a knife. What were you thinking?”

          “My apartment is in ruins,” I snapped. “Everything I own is destroyed. All my clothes are ripped to pieces, all the furnature is broken and torn apart, my monitor has a hammer shaped hole in it, and all the pieces of my computer are strewn across the floor. They took the hard drive that was in it, but all it had on it were my games and some pirated movies. Forgive me for losing my temper.”

          “Is that what you meant when you said your apartment was a disaster?” Ryan snapped back and I winced. “You fucking lied to me?”

          “It wasn’t a lie and was going to tell you after you came back from this shit show of a meeting,” I huffed. “I wanted to know what happened here before I jumped to any conclusions. I was just a little shaken up after realizing that Coins was coming for me and hearing you and Geoff talk about killing me and completing the hit didn’t exactly help my mental state either. My plans have been falling into chaos all fucking night, just be glad I didn’t bring a gun. I would have lit that motherfucker up the moment he defended Swords.”

          There was silence as I sheathed my knife because my trembling was making it difficult to keep a safe grip, and everyone mulled over what I had said.

          “Why does he hate you so much?” Jeremy asked and changed the topic. “This seems really intense for something that happened to a douchebag five years ago.”

          “I killed Swords,” I said flatly. “I beat him to a bloody pulp with a baseball bat while Coins and Cups were out on a mission. Coins and Swords were close. So close that I’m sure that they were seeing each other, but I wouldn’t be able to confirm that because I was literally locked in a room with my computer and only allowed out when Swords wanted to fuck me somewhere else in the hideout.”

          “He and Cups walked in long after Swords had died, but I was still swinging,” I sighed. “And the state of his body absolutely broke Coins. It’s the only reason I was able to get away. I’m positive he hates me because I killed Swords and ruined their crew ‘for no reason’.”

          Jeremy and Ryan couldn’t see the air quotes that I made with my fingers, but Michael snorted while I heard Jack sigh heavily.

          “Turns out I should be glad it was Coins and Cups who showed up fist,” I smirked as the morbid thought crossed my mind. “Sounds like Jack and Geoff weren’t too far behind us.”

          “The carpet was still wet,” Geoff sighed. “You really did a number on him. No head to speak of, extremities broken, chest partially caved in.”

          “I might have gotten carried away,” I said and could feel the worried looks the four behind me were sending my way. “I started at the legs and worked my way up. He was still screaming when I got to his head. I thought I would love to hear him beg for mercy the same way I did every time he unlocked that door.”

          “Not as satisfying as you had hoped, was it?” Jack asked and I could tell what she was fishing for, but she was sorely mistaken.

          “Nope,” I sighed. “It wasn’t enough. I spent two years being used and abused by him. He got to die, but I’m still here suffering because of what he did.”

          “When were you planning on telling us this?” Geoff asked.

          “These are the skeletons I told you about Geoff. I already told Vagabond about my abuse,” I muttered and used Ryan’s codename as I remembered him saying there were others hiding amongst the containers. “Though I purposely left out the crew name. And the killing. I didn’t think this would become a problem and wanted to figure out where Cups had slipped off to before I brought you in. Make my baggage easier for you to handle.”

          “Well you bloody fucked that right up,” Gavin huffed and I didn’t need to look at him to see the smile.

          “I need to get back to the hideout and sort through everything I’ve done since I joined,” I sighed and rubbed my eyes with my palms. “This happened because I got careless, and I’ll be damned if I let something this big get away from me again. I need to look for and fix any holes I can find. We were lucky and got off easy tonight. Next time might not go so well, and I couldn’t live with myself if any of you got hurt over my mistakes.”

          “There’s my Brie,” Ryan whispered.

          For a moment terror washed over me. Old wounds had been ripped open and hearing Ryan refer to me possessively briefly brought me back to that dark, disgusting room that I lived in while with Tarot. But Jack’s sweet ‘awe’ followed by Ryan’s warning grumble reminded me that I was safe here. No matter how much I fucked up, if Ryan even considered hurting me like Swords did, the Fakes would shut him down. They wouldn’t stand by and watch like Coins and Cups did.

          “Whose bike is this?” Jeremy asked as he beat us to the vehicles.

          “That would be mine,” I smirked. “We can leave it though. Storage didn’t treat it well, and besides, it’s just a reminder for me.”

          “Why bring it then?” Michael asked.

          “I was kind of hoping I could burn it along with Coins and his boys,” I shrugged as I pulled off my peacoat and let it fall to the ground as I walked away. “I wasn’t in a great place when I left my apartment. That reminds me though, the next time I see that crate, it’s getting set on fire immediately.”

          “I can’t believe he would treat someone like that,” Ryan muttered sadly and as we got closer to the van, I felt myself speeding up to see him again.

          “Neither can I babe,” I sighed. “That’s why I’ve blocked out as much of it as I can.”

          “Just because Vagabond has forgiven you partially, doesn’t mean you’re off the hook on our end,” Jack said seriously, and Geoff grunted in agreement. “While I recognize that Vagabond as a whole wasn’t the problem, but you two need to tone it down. Your fast pace relationship was part of the reason you’ve gotten sloppy. Until she can sort her shit out and prove to us that she won’t let this happen again, you can’t be alone in her office. You can go back there with the Lads or something, but if anyone catches you two alone there will be consequences. The commons are the only acceptable places for you to do anything but work.”

          “Okay mom,” Ryan and I said in unison and I could hear Jeremy snort.

          “I’m dead serious you two,” Jack reiterated. “Keep it at home from now on.”

          “About that,” I sighed. “I’ll have to crash at the hideout for a while. There’s no way in hell I’m going back to that apartment now that they know where I live. I also refuse to stay with Vagabond or Meg until I know if they’re following me.”

          “I wouldn’t want you in my house anyway,” Gavin sniffed and I rolled my eyes. “I’m not sure I want Vagabond walking through like he owns the place.”

          “Let’s be real here,” Michael scoffed. “She’s gonna stay with Vagabond before she moves back in with Meg.”

          “When can I stop calling him Vagabond?” I asked. “It feels weird.”

          “You feel weird,” Ryan retorted.

          My body shook as what started as a light giggle escalated into hysterical laughter as my fear and anxiety took over again. Luckily, we were almost to the van so Geoff wrapped an arm around my shoulders and guided me to where Jeremy was waiting for us. He helped me up into the van and wrapped one of Ryan’s jackets around me before I curled up against the far door. Geoff took back his headset but slipped me one that I knew was broken. I couldn’t talk to Ryan as we waited for him, but at least I could hear him.

          “What’s taking you so long?” Jeremy asked him.

          “Don’t worry about it,” Ryan huffed back and it sounded like he was jumping off of something. “I had to do something real quick. It’ll all make sense in approximately five minutes.”

          “What are you blowing up?” Geoff sighed in frustration.

          “Well,” he said and I could hear him grin. “Michael couldn’t shoot anyone, and Brie wants that crate obliterated. So, I’m granting both their wishes.”

          “I’ll get the van ready to run,” Jack sighed in exasperation as everyone quickly loaded into the vehicle.

          “What exactly is being blown up Rye?” Geoff asked again once we were safe in the car.

          “They loaded the crate back into one of their vehicles and they were talking a distance away. About what, I don’t know, but that car is loaded with enough C4 to bring the cops in quick. I can see the van, so we’re in no real rush. We’ll be off the docks and on the freeway by the time it blows.”

          “You’re insane,” Michael chuckled. “I love it. I look forward to the boom and the sweet release that it will provide me.”

          “I do what I can,” Ryan chuckled and I pulled out the headset as his footsteps approached the van.

          He froze for a moment when he saw me curled up in his jacket, but quickly hopped up into the cabin and we made our way out of the maze of shipping containers. Ryan settled down beside me, but the warning glares from Geoff and Jack kept him from doing more than giving me a quick but tight hug that took my breath away. I wanted to bury my face in his shoulder and cry, but Jack was watching us while Geoff focused on driving.

          “So,” Ryan huffed as he pulled his mask off and shook his hair out. “To stave off the panic attack I know you’re fighting until Jack and Geoff deem it appropriate for me to hold you: How the actual fuck did you get that close to the meeting without me seeing you?”

          “Seriously!” Jeremy exclaimed as the two snipers watched me intently. “I saw the guys Ryan was talking about, the ones that were sneaking around between the containers, but I never even _thought_ I saw you.”

          “A magician never reveals their secrets,” I teased and Jeremy was the one to act upon the look Ryan was giving me.

          “Uh uh,” Jeremy grunted and shook his head. “You’re telling us right now.”

          “Seriously Babe,” Ryan agreed and I couldn’t hide my shock as he threw the pet name out so easily. “We could have seen you and shot you.”

          “That’s why I did my best to not be seen,” I smiled. “I climbed to the top of the stacks and made my way from there. I figured you’d be busy looking at the ground for hidden people, or way out for other snipers.”

          “You mean to tell me you were jumping around thirty plus feet in the air like it was no big deal? And near silently?” Gavin gasped and I nodded. “Jesus. You bloody nut!”

          “That sounds painful,” I winked.

          “We’re off the docks,” Geoff butted in. “Ryan, what’s the time on your C4?”

          “About a minute I think,” He hummed as he checked his watch. “Ope, no. Make that thirty seconds.”

          “There is no way that was five minutes,” Michael shook his head and Ryan just shrugged.

          The vehicle became quiet and tense as we all waited for the explosion, and I closed my eyes as I tried to imagine myself on the docks still, waiting to watch the show. When the shockwave hit, it took some of my pain away with it and the crack of the explosion shattered my already weakened composure.

          Michael and the others cheered happily as they stared out the windows at the pillar of fire that had erupted from the docks, and their excitement drowned out the shuddering gasp I let out. In my minds eye I was there, watching it all burn while Coins had a total meltdown. I smiled as tears rolled down my cheeks and felt like a great weight evaporated. I had always wanted to go back and burn all my things, but fear of facing my past had always kept me from doing it, as if I could ignore it enough to make it no longer real. I didn’t have to turn around to enjoy the fireball because it lit up the interior. The glow from outside faded and I took in another shuddering breath.

          Ryan nudged my leg with his to get my attention and when I looked him in the eyes, I couldn’t take it anymore and threw myself into his arms. He held me close as I cried into his shoulder and I was totally enveloped by him. I couldn’t tell if Jack and Geoff were scolding us for already breaking their rule. All I could hear was Ryan’s heart, my harsh sobs, and my voice repeating the same two words.

          “ _Thank you_.”


	13. In the Fallout

          I shut my alarm off and groaned as I did my best to stretch out my cramped limbs. The couch was great for napping but sleeping overnight was starting to feel like a form of torture and the floor was becoming more appealing than the couch as I woke up one week after the incident at the docks with nearly immovable joints. I threw the blankets off me and stiffly rose to my feet.

          I shuffled over to my desk and squinted as I jostled my mouse and my computer monitors made me feel like I was staring at the sun. I still felt like it was way too early to be awake, but I needed to get up and be ready before everyone trickled into the hideout, so I straightened up my office and grabbed the pair of jeans and t-shirt that I had laid out before making my way to the bathroom.

          I stood in the hot water and just let it run over my face and sore limbs as I thought about the day ahead of me. I was almost done resifting through all the information Ryan and I had stolen from Anderson and the number of red flags I had found after the fact made me sick to my stomach. I spent most of the day after the docks beating my head on my desk as trap after trap became obvious and I became more and more frustrated with myself for letting the protection of the Fakes make me lazy. It was going to take at least another week to fill in blanks and fact check, but I could work on sorting through everything from the month prior to that while I waited for leads to come back.

          The most important thing about today is that it was my last day sleeping at the hideout. We had been vigilant and there were no physical signs of a tail and no word on the street about anyone coming for me. I had already began leaving stuff at Ryan’s before the break-in and the fact that I had to buy a whole new wardrobe made it easy to totally move in once the coast was clear. Meg and Jack were nice enough to go out and buy clothes for me while I laid low, but I hadn’t seen more than the two pair of jeans and handful printed t-shirts that they had given me to wear while I stayed here. I was almost as eager to see my new clothes as I was to finally sleep with Ryan again.

          Maybe it was coincidence, maybe Geoff did it on purpose, but Ryan had been very busy this week. Even if he _could_ come back to my office, I don’t think he would have had the time as he jumped from job to job. We texted of course, I wasn’t totally devoid of his company, but it wasn’t the same. We tried to make the best of our limited time together, but if we weren’t careful we would lose track of time while talking, so our physical contact was practically nonexistent. That night after the docks, he carried me from the van and into my office as I did my best to pull myself together again. He almost stayed the night, but I convinced him to go home and ever since there’s been something different about him.

          I couldn’t quite place what was different, but I had a few ideas. When we did happen to cross paths in the commons, he was more relaxed around me and the other Fakes. His teasing persisted, but it wasn’t as sexually charged. Now it was playful and flirty instead of trying to set me off so he could throw me around a bit. Maybe he was just being courteous to Jack and Geoff, who still watched us like hawks anytime we were near each other, maybe he was just trying to keep himself from getting carried away, but even the way he texted had changed.

          He started send me selfies out of the blue, with no real purpose other than to let me know what he was doing and to let me see his face. My mistake was introducing him to Snapchat, and now he could send me shots from jobs without having to worry about evidence staying on his phone or mine. I tried to tell him that there were servers that retained all the messages and that if the police thought about it they could get a warrant and get a hold of everything we sent each other but the Lads regularly used the app the same way, so he wasn’t overly concerned.

          He also seemed to be testing out pet names, because he’d use one for a day or so then switch to a different one. I sat back and let him play with them, though I did shut ‘pumpkin’ and any other foods down immediately, and I couldn’t help but wonder what that meant for us in the long run. Had he decided he was okay with something serious? Or was this another way he was testing his own willingness? All I knew was that ‘Sweets’ and ‘Sweetheart’ tickled me a little more than I had thought they would.

          He must have sense that I was thinking of him, because my phone pinged softly as I received a snap from him. It was about time for him to be getting up anyway, or at least it was when Edgar came and woke him up for cuddles before work. The little pit was just as accurate as an alarm clock. He knew when Ryan got up, so he slipped into the bedroom about an hour before hand so that he could lay in bed with his owner. I wasn’t warned of this, so the first time I spent the night I was woken up by an irritated Edgar because I was ‘in his spot’ curled up against Ryan’s chest.

          I opened the snap and smiled down at my phone as I saw Ryan, trying to take a sweet picture of him laying next to Edgar, but was ‘ruined’ by the pitbull’s eager kisses. I quickly screenshotted it and giggled softly as I saw him typing.

_Hey now. What’s up with that?_

          I sparingly took screenshots of his snaps, mostly because I usually stared at them until they disappeared but also was afraid of someone getting a hold of his face and causing problems. I had already fucked up royally, _that_ would end my career if not my life.

_I like it…_

_Well there’s no need to keep it. You’ll see it every morning from now on._

          I felt like something was gripping my heart, but it wasn’t anxiety or something negative like that. Tears welled in my eyes as I refused to close my phone and let the message go away forever. I had promised to walk away if he found out that he didn’t want to date me, but the longing ache that was making it hard for me to breathe told me that it would be so much harder than I had thought it would be almost a month ago.

          Everything in my body told me to say it. My thumbs twitched as I fought against my urge to tell him how I felt, but I couldn’t. We had fallen into a comfortable relationship together, but he still had yet to call me his girlfriend and I got the sensation that I would rather die than ruin this now by scaring him away before he was ready.

          I finally set my phone down and busied myself with weaving my long black hair into a loose braid, my hands trembling slightly as my hazel eyes stared back at me with a swirling combination of fear and love. For the first time in five years, I really looked at myself in the mirror.

          After I had killed Swords, I avoided looking at my reflection. Seeing the nearly skeletal version of myself that he had created made me sick and reminded me too much of the things I desperately wanted to forget. Even after I had gained weight back, my face morphed back into the hollow zombie every time I looked at myself in the mirror. So, I only focused on my body and eyes. My broad shoulders and stocky build never seemed to have the same effect, and if I focused on my eyes I couldn’t see the change.

          I stared at the caramel colored face watching me from the other side of the mirror and waited for the change, but it never came and my desire to cry only grew. I reached up and ran my fingers across the freckles that lined my cheeks like it was the first time I was seeing them.

          After Ryan had burned the crate full of clothes, I had felt like I was free and a new person. Like he had released me from a curse. The incident had reignited my nightmares, but I always woke up to a text or snap from Ryan and it chased the memories away like waving a torch to fend off the shadows. I couldn’t forget my past, that much was clear, but Ryan made it easier to deal with.

          I cleaned up the bathroom and sent Ryan a snap in response. I paused and looked at the happy woman who smiled sweetly back at me. For the first time in a long while, I saved the photo before adding text and sending it off.

_He’s going to have to find a new spot then_

          I quickly pulled up my messages and texted Meg as I padded back to my office.

_Me: I… I think I’m in love…_

_Me: For real this time._

          I picked up the room in a daze as the tingles from admitting my feelings for Ryan made me worry just as much as it made me feel like I was floating. Megs response was enough to bring me back down to Earth and make me feel better about this new realization.

_Meg: No shit Sherlock. I am in no way surprised. He literally burned your past for you, I’d be amazed if you didn’t go head over heels for him. Besides, it’s not a secret, even Gavin can see it and he’s dense as fuck._

_Me: What do I do? He hasn’t said anything on the dating front yet._

_Meg: What does your gut say?_

_Me: Wait…_

_Meg: So wait. You two have made it this far, what’s another week or two of him getting used to it? Besides, he’s letting you move in. He’s ready, he’s just nervous._

          She was right. We had only been making progress, so it would make sense that he would continue to move forward. Even after the docks, he didn’t seem to fall back in progress.

          I shook my head as I tried to focus on my work, but the anticipation of going home with Ryan and the fact that I’ve been staring at these screens with almost no break for the last seven days made my head get hazy. So I cranked up the volume on my computers and went to return to the couch for a nap, but as I stared at it my back ached so I threw a pillow on the floor and laid out.

          The next thing I remember was the feeling of a shoe nudging me in the ribs. I grunted and shot up only to see Geoff grinning down at me with his hands in his pockets.

          “I have good news and bad news,” the man giggled.

          “Good news?” I asked and rubbed my eyes as I stood up, my body creaking as it told me that the floor was only _slightly_ better than the couch.

          “You’re closer to going home with Ryan,” Geoff shrugged.

          “What’s the bad news?” I huffed as I sat down and woke my computer up.

          “You’ve been asleep a long time,” he said and drug out the ‘o’ for good measure.

          I frowned and as my monitors came on my jaw dropped.

          “You let me sleep until two in the fucking afternoon?” I bellowed and shot up, my sudden movement making Geoff take a few steps back but he kept his shit eating grin.

          “You were tired,” he tried to explain. “And Ryan said we should let you sleep.”

          “I don’t give a shit about what he said!” I snapped and heard Ryan’s indignant ‘Hey!’ from the commons. “I have work to do! I still have so much to go through!”

          “That’s exactly why you need to sleep!” Ryan called out as he walked back to my office. “You’ve been working yourself to death!”

          “I need to so that I don’t accidentally lead you to slaughter,” I huffed and the two men gave me an incredulous look. “Don’t give me that. We were _lucky_ Coins didn’t have the balls to fight _._ All he wanted to do was out me and cause problems. Well it worked, and now I need to fix those problems.”

          “Brie,” Ryan sighed as he stepped around Geoff. “You’ve been working nonstop all week. You need to relax or you’ll just end up missing stuff again.”

          “Well what am I supposed to do?” I asked.

          “Take it easy,” Ryan smiled. “It’s Friday for God’s sake! Load up a game and just answer emails today. You said you’ve got everything that we stole from Anderson all cleaned up, so just save the rest for Monday.”

          “He’s right Brie,” Geoff hummed. “I know we made a big deal of what happened and don’t get me wrong, it was a massive fuck up, but we won’t rip you a new one for taking a day slow.”

          “Besides,” Ryan smirked as he stepped forward and Geoff just sighed as the hitman snaked his arms around my hips. “I don’t want you all stressed out and tired when you come home tonight.”

          “Got big plans for me?” I sighed as he ignored Geoff’s warning look and pulled me flush to him.

          “I wouldn’t call them big, but yes. I have plans,” Ryan continued, and I inhaled sharply as he pressed a soft kiss to my lips. “If that’s okay with you Sweetheart.”

          “As long as your plans don’t involve sleeping on the couch,” I teased.

          “They don’t,” he huffed. “Besides, my couch is far more comfortable.”

          He leaned in to kiss my cheek but he lingered to whisper in my ear.

          “And there won’t be much sleep happening.”

          “Ryan,” Geoff grumbled warningly as the man in question shifted his weight and made my hips sway against his.

          “Can’t I just have a moment Geoff?” Ryan asked as he nuzzled my nose. “I’ve hardly seen her all week.”

          “You’re about to live with her. I think you can live a few more hours without your girlfriend,” Geoff snapped, and my cheeks lit up.

          “I’m not asking for the next few hours. Just a moment,” Ryan fought as he continued to hold me. “I’m just trying to get her to relax.

          “You get ten minutes.” Geoff relented. “Michael needs the time to get ready for your mission anyway. After that I’ll come back and kick your ass.”

          “Thanks Geoff,” we murmured in unison as he left.

          The door hadn’t closed before his lips sealed to mine and I couldn’t help but to giggle as his hands greedily grabbed at me. I whimpered as he took my lip gently between his teeth and his breath shuddered at my reaction.

          “Ryan,” I whimpered and tried to pull away enough to talk, but he followed me and continued to kiss me like he’d never get to again.

          “Ryan,” I said again but firmly and he stopped to listen. “Geoff’s right. I’m moving in. We’ll have plenty of time for this. Right now, can I just get this?”

          I wrapped my arms around his waist and laid my head on his chest, burying my face into the fabric as I held him close to me. I sighed as his wandering hands stopped to hold me as tightly as he could without hurting me and kissed the top of my head.

          “Of course babe,” he whispered into my hair.

          I took a deep breath and let his scent fill my nose. The world seemed to fade away and I could have easily fallen asleep standing there in his arms.

          “How are the nightmares?” he asked softly as he started petting my hair.

          “They’re just like they’ve always been,” I muttered. “Terrifying and anxiety inducing, but I usually just wake up and read your texts to feel better.”

          “You could have called me,” he huffed and kissed my head again.

          “I didn’t want to wake you. I know you like your beauty sleep.”

          “Is there anything I should be prepared for? If you have a nightmare while we’re together I mean.”

          “Just hold me,” I said as I reluctantly pulled away from his chest. “Maybe whisper in my ear or something. It should be able to break through to me and calm me without waking me up.”

          Ryan stared into my eyes and cupped my cheek as a smile spread across his face.

          “What?” I smiled back.

          He bit his lip and took a deep breath before opening his mouth to say something, but a loud voice cut him off.

          “Ryan!” Michael bellowed. “Put your dick away and let’s go!”

          “It better not be out!” Geoff called.

          “It’s not out!” Ryan shouted, and I broke down into giggles as our sweet moment was totally obliterated.

          “Now you’ve gone and broke her!” Ryan grinned, making me laugh more as he chuckled.

          “You can fix her later. We need to go,” Michael said.

          “I’ll see you later baby,” Ryan cooed as he pressed a kiss to my lips and I felt him smile against my failing attempt to kiss back despite my giggles.


	14. Date Night

          I looked at Ryan suspiciously as he held out a blindfold.

          “You wouldn’t hesitate to take this if we were in bed,” he smirked.

          “We’re not in bed,” I said, my cautious tone echoing through his garage.

          “I told you I had plans for you and this is part of it,” he grinned.

          “You couldn’t just turn the lights off and surprise me with car sex?” I smirked back.

          “Fine,” he huffed and made a grab for me. “If you’re going to resist, I’ll just have to get rough.”

          I giggled as I swatted his hand away, but he reached out for me again and caught me this time. I tried to shake him off, but he ended up throwing me over the hood of his car. I couldn’t stop myself from moaning as he used his hips to pin me against the Zentorno and his low laugh made my skin crawl. I didn’t fight him as he covered my eyes with the blindfold, and after stepping away he spun me to face him and I was surprised by a passionate kiss.

          “You could have just asked if you wanted me to rough you up,” he hummed before planting another, softer kiss on my lips.

          “Where’s the fun in that?” I smiled and shivered as his breath suddenly heated my neck.

          “Fair enough,” he sighed before gently biting my neck.

          His hands ghosted across my bare arms and my breath hitched as he kissed my ear.

          “How did I get lucky enough to find you?” he whispered.

          “Rye,” I whimpered as he nuzzled my ear and I felt like my heart was going to explode. “You said you had plans that didn’t involve sex in the garage.”

          “You’re right. Let’s go” he murmured before stepping away and taking my hand so he could lead me through the now dark garage.

          He had blindfolded me before during sex, and I loved how the dark made my sense of touch a thousand times stronger. In bed, I felt like his hands were electric and every time he slid his fingers along my body, they sent my nerves into a frenzy. Now though it was different, just like everything about him recently. Now his hand was warm and comforting wrapped around mine, and while his touch still sent me into a tizzy, it was more like butterflies than electric shocks.

          He chuckled as the elevator started moving and I gripped his hand tightly when the motion startled me. I let go of his hand and slid mine up his arm. Once I had an idea of how he was standing, I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face into his chest. His smell seemed to tickle my nose as I took a deep breath and reveled in my regained ability to hold him.

          “I missed this too,” he murmured before kissing the top of my head and giving me a tight hug as the elevator doors opened.

          The first thing that hit me was the smell of pasta sauce and cooked cheese, which made my mouth water as I had only been able to eat frozen dinners and take out for the last week. As Ryan guided me through his apartment, I heard the familiar skitter of dog feet running across the hardwood accompanied by a woman’s giggles.

          “Jack?” I called out into the dark as Edgar danced around my feet. “Is this where you’ve been all day?”

          “Sort of,” I heard her smile. “I had to do some grocery shopping before I could start cooking.”

          “What on Earth are you planning Haywood?” I smiled as he nudged me up the stairs.

          “You’ll see soon enough,” he hummed.

          I was lead into his bathroom and lifted so that I could sit on the edge of the sink.

          “Can I take this off now?” I asked, lifting my hand to my face as I heard him washing his eye paint off.

          “Not yet,” he snapped and smacked my hand. “You can take it off after I’m done getting ready and tell you to take it off.”

          “‘Done getting ready’?” I snorted. “If I didn’t smell Italian food cooking downstairs, I’d genuinely be afraid right now.”

          “What makes you think I can’t be up to something _and_ have dinner?”

          “You have a point,” I sighed after a moment’s thought. “I’m sufficiently fearful now.”

          “Good,” he growled suddenly in my ear, making me jump and gasp.

          He giggled before kissing my nose and firmly holding my face before speaking.

          “Now I’m going to change, and you need to sit tight right here until I say otherwise,” Ryan said and I could tell by the way he was holding me that he was talking to me and trying to look me in the eyes.

          “Is it like this when you torture people?” I teased. “Do you talk to them like you haven’t blinded them and aren’t about to fuck with them?”

          “Usually when I get to the banter part they aren’t blindfolded anymore,” I heard him shrug. “And you’re going to enjoy this more. Trust me”

          He gave me a peck on the lips and I laughed softly as I heard him slip out of the bathroom and start moving around quickly in the bedroom. I ran my hand along the marble countertop and sighed as I felt like I was at home here. My week of anxiety and terrible sleep faded from my bones as I listened to Ryan’s jacket hit the floor with a heavy ‘thump’ in the other room. I kicked off my sneakers and imagined myself sleeping in _our_ bed later, giggling as I thought of Edgar licking my face in the morning as he wedged himself between us.

          The door creaked open and I huffed as I realized that he was checking to make sure I wasn’t peeking.

          “Count to ten and then you can take that off,” he laughed. “I’m sure you’ll know what to do. I’ll be downstairs when you’re ready.”

          I gave him a thumbs up and started counting down from ten as soon as I heard the door close. I gently lowered myself to the floor and stopped counting when I heard a wolf whistle come from the kitchen. I mentally said fuck it, pulled the blindfold off my head, and once my eyes adjusted to the lights my heart stopped at what I saw.

          Hanging from the shower curtain rod was a deep red, A-line dress that would come to my knees once I put it on. I bit my lip as my mind and heart raced with ideas and emotions. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face as I frantically ripped my clothes off and slid into the dress. Meg must have helped him pick it out because it fit me like a glove. Luckily the bra I was wearing had removable straps because, whether he realized it or not, it was an over the shoulder style and my black straps looked silly.

          I paused and looked myself over in the mirror, and for the second time today I fought off tears as the figure that looked back at me remained a beautiful young woman instead of shifting into a zombie. I slowly opened the door and looked into the bedroom, only seeing Ryan’s pile of discarded clothes as evidence of his costume change. My heart jumped into my throat as I hesitantly opened the door to the hallway and made my way downstairs.

          “Surprise!” he grinned and held his arms out.

          I was genuinely speechless as I saw him standing between me and the dinning table, black button up practically form fitted to him and the sleeves pushed above his elbows. His hair was pulled back in a tight ponytail rather than the loose one he usually wore it in. My eyes drifted down to his black dress pants and black socks. His low chuckle brought my eyes back up to his face but he wasn’t looking back at me, instead he was looking at the way the dress hugged my waist.

          “I told you that this one would look better,” he muttered and I raised an eyebrow.

          “You just can’t appreciate a woman in a floor length dress,” Jack huffed, drawing my attention to where she was standing in the kitchen wiping her hands as she finished cleaning the room.

          “I’m sure I could, but not tonight,” Ryan smiled as he stepped forward and placed a hand on my hip. “Tonight’s not the night for something as fancy as a floor length black dress.”

          “Was that the other option?” I asked and smirked as Jack nodded, her red curls bouncing against her grinning cheeks. “I want to see what slinky black dress you picked out for me.”

          “Not slinky,” Ryan corrected as he rolled his eyes. “And I didn’t pick it. Meg did. We can take a look at it later when you go through your new wardrobe, but now is the time to eat.”

          “And time for me to go,” Jack said before kissing my cheek. “Ryan only asked me to cook dinner, and you’re not at work so there’s no need to chaperone.”

          “You asked her to cook?” I asked and for a moment he looked bashful.

          “I knew I would be busy with work,” he shrugged off. “And she makes better lasagna anyway.”

          I looked around Ryan and saw two places set at the table, each with a healthy portion of lasagna and a wine glass.

          “Did you put Diet Coke in a wine glass?” I giggled.

          “I mean, I’m not going to put wine in it so why not?” he smiled back.

          “You’re a fucking dork,” Jack laughed as she shoved Ryan on her way to the elevator. “You two have fun tonight. Enjoy your weekend Brie.”

          Before I could question her wink, Ryan guided me to the table and sat me in my chair as he distracted me with conversation.

          Murder wasn’t a normal dinner topic, we knew that, but it came out so easily for us that we didn’t shy away from our work week. He told me all about the informant he and Michael shook down today, and I shared with him some of the hits I managed to find for him while I was waiting for emails. Conversation drifted towards my on-going repair job, but Ryan was careful to keep it from getting too in depth so I didn’t start to panic at the memory. The lasagna was long gone, and he was on his third Coke by the time conversation started to fade

          “So, you have the whole weekend planned?” I teased as he gathered our dishes.

          “Don’t listen to her,” Ryan scoffed, but I could see something behind his eyes. “I only have definite plans for tonight. The rest of the weekend is ours to figure out as we go.”

          “Ryan,” I hummed and his eyes continued to hide something.

          “What?” he huffed with a smile. “I can’t plan the perfect date, right down the perfect dress and tiny butler and not be judged?”

          “Tiny butler?” I repeated.

          Ryan simply smiled and glanced to the floor on his way to the kitchen. My jaw dropped and I cooed as I saw Edgar laying on the floor with a little black bowtie on his collar. Ryan laughed as I pulled out my phone and took pictures and sent them to Meg and the Lads.

          “I’m never going to hear the end of this,” the hitman shook his head as he set the dirty plates and glasses in the sink.

          “You should have known that I would lose it when I saw that,” I giggled before getting up to pet the little butler who was grinning up at me.

          “That’s why I lead with it,” Rye sighed as he leaned against the wall nearby.

          “Got something you don’t want over shadowed by the fact that you put enough thought into this to go out and get a dog bowtie?”

          “This whole night is about you Brie,” he said bluntly, almost like he was rushing to get it out before he could stop himself.

          I froze for a moment as the hidden emotion came through in his eyes and I slowly walked towards him as I tried to figure out what it was.

          “You’ve been working tirelessly the past week because you don’t want us getting hurt, and at the docks I watched you lose your mind because everything you had worked for was slipping through your hands.” Ryan muttered as he watched me approach. “I also had to stand back this week and watch you deal with your reopened scars alone because Jack and Geoff would have jumped down my throat. Not that you would have let me help you, because that’s who you are. Strong, independent, and selfless despite your manipulative personality.”

          “So, I picked out a dress I knew you’d love,” he continued as he pulled me to his chest, wrapping his arms around my waist before he stepped away from the wall. “I had Jack make a meal that you enjoy, dressed up Edgar because I wanted to see you smile, and wore a shirt I knew you’d want to see me in. Now that we’re done eating, I was thinking we might dance for a while if Edgar doesn’t get in the way and trip us. After that, I’ll take you upstairs to _our_ room, put that blindfold back on you and drive you wild.”

          “Ryan,” I whispered as I finally recognized the look in his eyes.

          He swayed slowly and looked at me with a small half smile on his lips.

          “That’s why I lead with the bowtie,” he said, trying to turn the conversation away from the tears that were forming in my eyes. “I knew that one or the other would be lost in the emotions.”

          He was about to speak again, but I cut him off by cupping his cheeks in my hands and pulling him in for a kiss. I felt his hands twitch against my back and his breath hitched as I carded one hand through his hair and held him in place for more. Ryan sighed heavily as he gave up on dancing and lifting me up so he could carry me to the stairs.

          “So much for that part of the plan,” I teased as he shifted to hold me bridal style before climbing the stairs.

          “Since when do we stick to the plan?” he retorted as he kicked the bedroom door shut behind him.

          I giggled as he set me down by the bed and once I was on my feet, his hands were firmly grabbing my ass. His grip caused me to stand on my tiptoes and I moaned into his mouth as he sealed his lips to mine. I shivered as he let go with one hand so he could pull down the zipper on my dress and my hands trembled with excitement as I began unbuttoning his shirt. It had been a week since we last had sex, and this afternoon in my office was the first time in just as long since we could do more than hug. The way he shuddered as I untucked his shirt and ran my hands across his bare chest reminded me that I wasn’t the only one who’s been craving this contact.

          He released my lips and nibbled his way down to my shoulders, where he bit down hard and laughed at my surprised moan. He released me so that I could pull my dress off and I paused so that I could appreciate the sight of him: Shirt unbuttoned and untucked hanging off his shoulders, scarred chest toned and firm as he pushed me onto the bed.

          “Where’s the blindfold?” he smirked.

          “Bathroom,” I winked as I sat up to take my bra off before laying back down and waiting for him to return.

          I listened to him walk around the room and my skin prickled with anticipation. I stretched out across the bed and jumped as the blindfold suddenly landed beside my head. Ryan giggled at me as he came back around to the edge of the bed. He crawled on top of me and began kissing and nibbling on my jaw and lips.

          “How do you want it?” he whispered before taking my lip between his teeth.

          “Surprise me,” I murmured once he had let go.

          “Tonight’s about you baby, so how do you want me?” he hummed before kissing me passionately while he ran a hand through my hair and pulled out my braid.

          “What’s the point of the blindfold if I know what’s coming?” I giggled between kisses. “I want you to surprise me. Do your worst. Or your best, depending on how you want to look at it.”

          “I’ll see what I can do,” he chuckled before standing so he could take his pants off.

          I pulled the blindfold back over my eyes, pausing momentarily so I could watch Ryan shimmy out of his now tight dress slacks. I smiled and bit my lip as I laid back and tried to relax so I wouldn’t jump as soon as he-.

          “What are you smiling at?” he teased, making me jump as his hand unexpectedly wrapped around my breast and gently rolled my nipple between two fingers

          I laughed nervously into the darkness, his other hand dragging its nails across my waist so lightly it almost tickled. His laughter filled my ears as he released my breast and ghosted his fingertips down the center of my body, one finger hooking under my panties as he hummed happily. I imagined him looking down at my squirming and eager body, sly smile spread across his cheeks as he knew exactly what this was doing to me.

          “Look at you,” Ryan cooed as he pulled my panties down. “Has it really been so long that all I have to do is kiss you a little bit to get you going?”

          “I haven’t been able to touch you all week,” I whined, toes curling as his hand brushed against my thighs.

          “True,” he continued as both hands made their way back up to my chest. “But where is the ‘strong and independent’ woman I was just eating dinner with?”

          I shivered and bit my lip when his warm breath spread across my belly as Ryan kissed around my bellybutton, lips barely making contact with my skin.

          “Is this what you wanted?” he whispered, hands slowly coming down my body and spreading my legs. “Does my strong and independent Sweetpea want me to have control over her like this?”

          “Yes,” I whimpered as his tongue flicked across my skin.

          A knot formed in my throat as I realized that this is what I had always wanted, to give up control and not be afraid to fall, but Ryan’s slow trail of kisses kept me from dwelling on that long enough to shed the tears that formed under my blindfold. I gasped as his hands suddenly and roughly grabbed my hips and yanked me to the edge of the bed.

          “I wonder,” he hummed quietly as he let a finger slide along the curve of my hip. “What should I surprise you with tonight?”

          I furrowed my brow as his touch disappeared, but before I could question him I felt Ryan’s hands lift my legs and hook them over his shoulders. I inhaled sharply as his arms wrapped around my thighs and a short, hesitant breath warmed my folds before his tongue separated them and found its way to my clit.

          “Ryan,” I moaned loudly as his lips sealed around the bundle of nerves, inadvertently making my thighs clench around his head.

          Ryan groaned with pleasure as I shook at every flick of his tongue, and as if I wasn’t overwhelmed enough, his hand found mine and carefully guided it to his head. I carded my fingers through his hair and gripped it firmly, pulling another moan from the hitman’s throat.

          “Fuck,” I moaned as his tongue swirled around my clit.

          My mouth hung open and my gasps and airy moans filled the room as Ryan went down on me for the first time. He was sloppy and unsure of his movements as he explored all the patterns he could think of, and it occurred to me that this may be his first time going down on a woman in a very long time.

          I pulled off my blindfold and held myself up on my elbow.

          “Fuck,” I groaned as he looked up at me, hair falling in his face as my grip pulled it out of his ponytail.

          He moaned and his eyelids fluttered when we locked gazes. My head fell back and I giggled through my moans as I adjusted my grip of his hair. His hands dug into my thighs as I rolled my hips up into him but held his head in place.

          “Ryan,” I muttered as I pulled his head away, making him gasp in surprise before a smirk spread across his lust drunk face.

          “Did I tell you to take the blindfold off?” he teased, his harsh tone and rough grip making goosebumps form across my legs.

          His eyes slowly drifted to the raised hair and his smirk turned to a grin as he noticed my reaction. Ryan tried to go back to work but I had a firm grip on him and all he did was tug his own hair and let his tongue hang out of his mouth. He groaned as I lifted his head to look at me.

          “I couldn’t pass up this view,” I smiled and released his hair.

          His fingertips dug into my hips as he pulled me closer to him and his low chuckle vibrated my hips as I moaned loudly. He was finding his rhythm and learning which motions garnered his favorite reactions, all just to make me squirm and say his name. My hands wove back into Ryan’s hair, but this time I was just looking for something to hold onto as he pushed me closer to my orgasm. He must have known I was getting close, because he hummed happily as he slowly drug his tongue across my clit before pulling away and standing.

          “Was that a good enough surprise?” he teased and laughed when I nodded. “Good. Now put the blindfold back on so I can make you squirm more.”

          “No,” I huffed as I was coming down and aching for release.

          “Excuse me?” he grinned evilly.

          “Make me,” I winked.

          He bent over to grab it but I quickly hooked it around my finger and held it out of his reach. I rolled over onto my stomach and tried to get out from under him, but he quickly grabbed my hips and yanked me to the edge of the bed. I whimpered as my ass collided with his hips, and for a moment I thought he was going to give up on the blindfold and just fuck me right there, but he just giggled evilly as he reached for it. Ryan intentionally rubbed his hard cock against my ass as he put a hand firmly on my back so that I couldn’t move anymore.

          “You know what?” Ryan paused as he gently pulled the mask from my hand. “I kind of like this idea better. You want to fight me? Go ahead. When I pin you, I’ll remind you of what started this whole relationship.”

          “And that would be?” I giggled and watched the blindfold go flying over his shoulder as he stepped back.

          “How much you love it when I hold you down and fuck you,” he rumbled.

          I felt my heart shoot up into my throat, and for a moment I was afraid I was going to have a panic attack. This was eerily similar to what Swords had done to me: Lock me in a room and play with me while I ran from him. After the docks, all those memories came flooding back to me and I had dreamt of them every night since.

          But, as Ryan’s head tilted while he waited for me to make the first move, the buzzing feeling in my chest turned into excitement instead of fear or anxiety. Ryan’s fingers twitched like a gunslinger ready to draw his gun as he tensed and prepared to grab me. My breath hitched as the thought of the inevitable rough sex made my heart skip a beat. Only with Ryan could the ‘perfect date’ still include hair pulling and being pinned to the mattress.

          I brought my leg up and tried to push myself off the other end of the bed, but he was ready for me and caught me mid-jump and threw me to the head of the bed. I backed up into the pillows as he crawled up onto the bed, moving slowly so he could grab me again if I tried to run.

          His hand wrapped around my ankle and I squeaked as he pulled me onto my back. I tried to close my legs but his grip on my ankle gave him all the leverage he needed to spread me wide as he positioned himself between my legs.

          “I thought you wanted me to fight you?” I giggled as he lined himself up at my entrance.

          “You did,” he grinned. “And now I’m getting to the ‘holding down and fucking’ part.”

          He let go of my ankle as he slowly pushed himself into me and we moaned in unison as he slowly leaned into me. Once he was safely in, both of Ryan’s hands grabbed my hips as he started thrusting slowly. The pressure from him filling me brought back all the work he had done with his tongue and I clenched tight around him as he picked up his pace.

          “Already Brie?” he teased, head falling backwards slightly as he recognized my warning signs. “I didn’t think you were that desperate for me.”

          All I could do was swear loudly as he thrust forward suddenly and used his grip on me to pull me into his motions. He started to move quickly, clearly eager to make me come despite his teasing and I started to twitch as every thrust added to the pressure building between my hips.

          “Ryan,” I moaned as I felt myself nearing the edge.

          I was given a low laugh in return and one of his hands came up and wrapped around my throat. I let out a loud moan as he squeezed me carefully, just the way he knew I liked it, and his grip forced me to look up at him. I swore and bit my lip as Ryan’s eyes locked with mine and my skin started to prickle with passion.

          “Come for me baby,” he hissed and his tone was the final drop in the bucket.

          My eyes rolled back as a wave of ecstasy crashed over my body, making me shake as I was able to release for the first time in a week. My moans came out loud and choked as my writhing made his grip on my throat change, but it only added to the pleasure that was shooting through me. Ryan’s thrusts stuttered and he let out a low groan as I clenched and shook around him, but he was quick to recover and regained his pace.

          He let go of my neck and fell with his elbows on either side of my head. My shaking moans were cut off by a passionate kiss. Ryan whimpered and moaned into my lips as the change in position stimulated both of us in a new way, and I could tell by his hungry kisses that he was starting to feel his own orgasm beginning to build. I gently trailed my fingernails from his neck, across his shoulders, and down his arms knowing that he loved the gentle touch as much as I did.

          Ryan shivered and his lips pulled into a smile before he rested his head on my shoulder. He bit everywhere he could, each bite getting rougher as he neared release. I heard one hand grip the sheets tightly and he grunted into the hickey he was sucking into my neck as his thrusts stuttered.

          “Fuck,” he moaned, his voice going up in pitch. “Fuck, yes Brie.”

          He moaned loudly into my shoulder and I moaned with him as he climaxed. Ryan tried to thrust through it, but he shook so hard from the over stimulation that he practically dropped himself on top of me. I giggled and sighed as he heaved against me, his breath ragged against my chest where he laid his head as he came down. Once he could hold himself up again, Ryan started gently kissing his way back up to my lips.

          “Welcome home,” he whispered as he nuzzled my nose.

          I kissed him deeply, a smile pulling on my lips the whole time and it stayed as he climbed off me and cleaned me up. I felt like I was floating as he crawled into bed beside me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I let out a long shuddering sigh as he pressed soft kisses into my cheek and I fought off the urge to cry from happiness.

          “Brie,” Ryan said softly, and when I turned my head to look at him I was met with watery blue eyes. His hand came up and gently cupped my cheek.

          “I love you,” he murmured and I started crying. We both laughed quietly as he wiped the tears away and kissed my nose.

          “I love you too.”


	15. Shot Training

          I shivered as a wave of anxiety flowed through me, but I swallowed hard as I adjusted my grip on my pistol. I took a deep breath before taking aim down range and exhaled slowly as I tried to clear my racing thoughts. It was so much easier to fire a gun when in the heat of the moment. I had nothing to worry about then. I could just point in the direction of my target and fire without a problem. My aim wasn’t great, but at least I wasn’t shaking like I was right now.

          It didn’t help that he was behind me. Watching. Judging.

          Ryan had promised that he wouldn’t judge me for my terrible aim, but I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head as I adjusted my stance. I took another deep breath and tried to ignore him as I lined up my shot.  My shoulders relaxed as I exhaled and I pulled the trigger.

          Ten shots rang out, and even through my thick ear protection, they ached from the sound. I was shaking even more as I clicked on the safety and set it down on the counter in front of me. I jumped as a hand slipped around my waist and I sighed as I pulled my earmuffs down so I could hear Ryan clearly.

          “Didn’t mean to scare you,” he apologized as his black mask came into my peripheral vision.

          “I know you can’t help it but-,” he hummed in my ear as he hit the button that returned the target to our end of the range, and I already knew what he was going to say.

          “I need to relax,” I grumbled and pursed my lips as my voice shook.

          “Yeah,” he said. “But like I said, I know that’s not something you can control. So, as long as you want to, I’ll take you out here on slow days and we can work on getting you more comfortable with some of the smaller weapons.”

          I nodded as a cool breeze blew through the hills where the Fake AH Crew’s gun range was tucked away. The target came to a stop and fluttered in the wind as I reached out and tugged it off the clips. I sighed as I counted only eight holes, four of which were clustered on the left shoulder, one was where the heart was supposed to be and the last was an inch away from the shoulder.

          “One of those killed ‘em,” Ryan chirped, but that didn’t change the fact that the other nine were no more than warning shots.

          “How do I relax?” I asked, my tone giving away my own disappointment.

          “I can’t help you with that,” Ryan said reluctantly. “You were doing all the right things: deep breaths, good stance, relaxed shoulders. The problem is your phobia. No matter how hard you try, your brain keeps telling you to be afraid and so you’re shaking. We just need to deprogram that part of your brain somehow.”

          “Any suggestions?” I asked as I hung up a fresh target and sent it down range.

          “Well, you’re doing good by continuing to try,” he smiled, the praise making me smile and melt into his arms slightly. “The only other way I could think of is to reward you every time you fire. Start associating guns with something positive instead of your negative memory.”

          “So you’re going to start bringing cookies when we come out here?” I giggled.

          “There are other means of positive reinforcement,” he hummed next to my ear.

          “You’re going to fuck me after every clip?” I laughed even harder.

          “It didn’t sound so bad in my head,” he muttered and the hills echoed with my laughter.

          “But now that I have you relaxed, have another go,” he huffed as he set down a loaded clip. “This time go for head shots. The heart is a relatively small target, and anywhere on the head is probably going to kill them.”

          I nodded as I pulled my earmuffs back on. The anxiety returned almost as soon as Ryan’s presence had left, and after reloading the gun I began to tremble slightly. Again, I took deep breaths before flicking off the safety, aiming at the target, and firing, the whole time my shaking getting worse.

          Ryan came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me while we waited for the target to come back. He continued to encourage me, but I couldn’t help but notice that he was repeating himself because I kept making the same mistakes. The target had all ten bullets pass through but only six hit anywhere on the head, the other four were a couple inches away from the silhouette.

          “You’re aim is good,” Ryan nodded. “I knew that wouldn’t be the problem. I’m willing to bet that those four on the outside are your first four rounds, because after that you’re past being afraid of the gun and can focus on hitting the target.”

          I sank back into Ryan as he spoke, and I fought off the need to cry because of my anxiety. I pulled his arms tighter around me as I leaned my head back into his shoulder and stared up at the sky.

          “We can stop if you want,” he whispered and leaned into my cheek. “I left my jacket in the car if you want to curl up while I get a few rounds in with my rifle.”

          “I _want_ to stop being afraid,” I sighed, voice cracking as I shook my head. “I want to be more useful than Gadget Girl and info broker.”

          It had been almost a month since I had moved in with Ryan and with most of the drama out of the way, I was becoming painfully aware of how little of a part I played with the Fakes. Geoff and I had stopped trying to develop new tech that could help with heists because most of our ideas seemed to only get in the way more than they helped. So my tech skills have been directed towards improving their communication system, including developing a built in mic and earpiece into Ryan’s mask. As for incorporating me in heists physically, all the jobs we had been getting were heavy in the ‘run and gun’ department and usually required Ryan or Jeremy to play my bodyguard, and I absolutely hated it. It made me feel more like a burden than helpful.

          “I know you do Sweetheart,” he sighed before pressing his head to the back of mine. “But over exerting yourself like this isn’t good for you. The constant anxiety will mess with you. But if you want to keep going, I won’t stop you. Not yet anyway.”

          I prepped my next attempt and, again, as soon as Ryan let go of me and stepped back I felt my chest tighten with fear. Before lifting the gun, I closed my eyes and tried to focus, but Ryan was right and the constant up and down of anxiety was making it harder and I was starting to shake more. I took a deep breath and thought of Ryan’s arms around me to calm my nerves. It worked for my normal panic attacks when he was out late for a job and I had a nightmare, maybe it could at least calm me enough to unload one last clip.

          Sure enough, the thought of his arms wrapped tightly around my waist and the heat of his body on my back steadied my hands, so I lifted the pistol and took aim. I relaxed like I was settling into his chest behind me and my mind cleared enough that I could lock in on the head of my target.

          The recoil didn’t hurt my hands as much as the last few attempts, and for the first time, I lowered my gun and didn’t feel the need to throw it as far away from me as I could. Ryan could tell the difference as well, because when he came up behind me, he squeezed my shoulder excitedly.

          “That looked better,” he beamed. “From where I was standing, I couldn’t tell if you were shaking but you at least looked more relaxed.”

          When the target came back, I shared in his excitement as I counted ten holes: eight clustered in the center of the head, one that was just off the skull, and one that was an inch away.

          “One more,” Ryan encouraged. “One more doing whatever it was that you just did. If you can repeat this, we might be onto something.”

          I set up one last run and this time I totally stopped shaking as I thought of Ryan’s head resting on my shoulder. Ten more rounds and a small wave of anxiety later, he had me pinned against the barrier as he eagerly awaited the results. He was holding me tightly and I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face as he emanated a small amount of pride.

          Ten more holes: Eight head shots and two misses.

          Ryan spun me around, lifted his mask, and kissed me passionately and I whimpered into his lips as he pushed me up onto the barrier and wrapped my legs around his waist.

          “Ryan! I’m not sure I’m into having sex out doors,” I giggled when he let go and made for my neck.

          He buried his face into my chest and hugged me tightly before setting me down.

          “Besides,” I smiled before kissing his nose. “We can’t do anything out here if you’re going to take your mask off. We don’t know who could be watching.”

          “I know,” he smiled, kissing me one last time before pulling the skull back into place. “But this is really big for you, and I was overcome with emotion.”

          “You think it’s hot don’t you?” I teased, my smirk growing into a grin as I saw the twinkle in his eyes.

          “I might,” he winked.

          “You’re sick,” I continued to tease as he stepped away.

          “I’m sick?” Ryan spat playfully as he started to unpack his sniper rifle. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed how you look at me when I’ve got this thing on my back. Yeah, I think you firing a gun is fucking hot, but I don’t even have to get this out of its case for your panties to drop.”

          “They don’t _drop_ ,” I huffed indignantly as I packed up my pistol. “There’s just something about the way you look when you’re getting ready for a job. Focused. Determined.”

          “Murderous,” he added as he gave me a look that made my skin crawl. “Now, I know you’re not going to like being near this when it goes off. Even in the car it might scare you, but at least in the car you can feel safe and comfortable.”

          I walked over to him as he gave the gun a once over, making sure everything moved as it should and I felt my anxiety creep back into my chest as I looked down at the gun.

          “I won’t be too long,” he murmured as he pressed his face to the side of my head and I heard him kiss me through the mask. “In the meantime you can decide what’s for dinner, okay?”

          “Any preferences?” I asked, eyes not moving from the gun.

          “I don’t particularly feel like cooking,” he shrugged. “But if you’ve got your heart set on something, I won’t complain.”

          “Order sushi?” I offered as I watched him check the bolt action, and I felt a tingle run down my spine, but not of fear.

          “That sounds delicious actually,” Ryan laughed, then noticed my gaze. “Baby, you can leave if you want. You’ve done more than I could have hoped today, I don’t need you to over extend yourself.”

          “I actually don’t mind this at the moment,” I smirked and reached out to hook my fingers around the bolt. “I’ve always kinda liked bolt action weapons. There’s something so satisfying about watching it move. Once it’s loaded is when I start getting nervous.”

          “It is pretty satisfying,” he said as a hand slipped around my waist. “Maybe one day, if you ever get comfortable enough, I’ll let you fire this. It’s even better when there’s a round in the chamber. The mechanism actually feels like it’s doing something.”

          “You just want to see me laid out on the ground with a sniper in my hands,” I teased, stomach dropping slightly at the idea of firing this.

          “You can stand and fire this,” Ryan countered but I could hear the indignation in his voice.

          “Either way you get off on it,” I smirked and turned my head to look at him and he was looking back at me with a mixture of love and lust in his eyes. “Does it have to be loaded? Or could I just walk up with this empty and have you drop to your knees?”

          “Just go sit in the car,” he growled in my ear.

          “I’ll take that as a ‘yes’,” I giggled as let go of me.

          Ryan slapped my ass as I was walking away and when I turned around to scold him, he had the gun slung over shoulder as he stepped away from the table and winked. I winked back and waved as I made my way down the hill to where the Zentorno was parked.

          I was beginning to enjoy this ‘domestic Vagabond’ that had become a thing since we had become serious. He was slipping into the boyfriend role flawlessly now, but there was still Vagabond in all the things he did. Like deciding what’s for dinner over a sniper rifle, or trading ways to remove blood stains while doing laundry or discussing the day’s hits and heists while laying in bed in the morning. At first it felt a little off, like we should separate home and work, but after everything that had happened at the docks and considering just how much the crew influenced us, it was clear that wasn’t going to happen.

          Besides, that was part of the thrill, right? I was dating _the_ Vagabond. The mention of his name made the police shiver in their boots, kids wore his outfit as a costume on Halloween, the media painted him as the boogeyman. So what if there wasn’t a true separation between Ryan and his persona? It made everything interesting.

          I was opening the car door when the first shot cracked through the air and I jumped as the sound startled me. My heart was in my throat as the anxiety gripped my chest and brought tears to my eyes. I snatched up Ryan’s jacket and quickly put it on, letting his smell envelop me before the second shot rang out. I didn’t jump this time, and while I did flinch, my anxiety didn’t flair up anymore. A third shot went off and I reacted the same. Flinch and heart skip. I had an idea and sighed as I pulled the leather jacket around me more. A fourth and no change finally convinced me to go through with the idea. I slowly made my way back up the hill as Ryan continued to fire.

          Five. The sound was louder now, and I was glad I had left my earmuffs around my neck because my ears were already starting to ring from here.

          Six. I could feel the concussion now, and I froze in place as it hit me like a slap across the face. My chest tightened more, but it faded as I buried my nose into the collar of Ryan’s jacket.

          Seven. I jumped again as I neared the top of the hill where the range sat, but my anxiety stayed at the same level as I took a few more steps and crested the hill.

          Eight. I was probably about one hundred feet behind Ryan, who was laying out on the concrete pad that they used for sniper practice. It faced outwards into the gently sloping land and amongst the dips, the Fakes had set up metal targets that would spin when hit, and their movement reflected light back at the shooter so they would know if they hit.

          Nine. The concussion felt more like a gentle push now that I didn’t have the ground to act as a buffer. I thought this would make me turn back, and the tears that welled in the corners of my eyes finally fell but no more followed them. I was trembling but with the help of his jacket, imagining Ryan standing beside me helped diminish the severity.

          Ten. I stood still as I watched Ryan shift onto his side as he pulled out a box and reloaded the gun. He didn’t notice me as he was totally focused on quickly sliding the rounds in.

          I had watched him operate through security cameras before, but to see it in person was astonishing. The muscle memory of a trained killer kept his movements smooth and precise as he slid the last bullets into the gun and let the bolt go, loading the first round into the chamber. Ryan rolled back to his stomach and he shifted slightly, aiming at a different target. From where I was standing, I couldn’t see any of them from here and I doubted I would see them flash when he hit. He waited for a few moments, taking in the wind speed and direction as he focused again.

          I flinched and jumped slightly when he fired the first round, but I didn’t feel like I was getting more anxious. Ryan pulled the bolt towards him as if he were beckoning for someone, middle and index fingers drawing it back before pushing it to the side, spent casing falling out of the chamber and the next bullet moved into position. Ryan was right. The bolt action was more satisfying when loaded, but I was still shaking, and my body was still screaming at me to run. I didn’t move though. I was comfortable enough to stay. I needed to get past my fear if I was going to be useful to the Fakes.

          The second shot rang out and I was brave enough to step forward, and after every round I took a few steps forward. Ryan fired off the fifth round and I could see the faint glimmer of a struck target. I had no idea how far away that was, but the butterflies in my stomach weren’t from fear as I watched him hit it again. I had never doubted his skills, he wouldn’t have his reputation if he couldn’t back it up but watching him hit the target again and again made my heart swell. My shaking persisted, and I finally stopped moving closer once I was about twenty feet behind him.

          Ryan shifted slightly again, deciding to aim somewhere else for his last two rounds, and once he settled he fired. Almost two seconds later, there was a flash of light farther out than the last one and I watched his torso lurch, his familiar short laugh shaking him slightly as he lined up his last go. I waited for the glint of a moving target before taking my earmuffs off.

          Ryan hopped up to his feet, brushing himself off before bending down to grab his gun. He slid the bolt back to make sure there weren’t anymore live rounds in the weapon and when he looked up from it his eyes fixed on me. I became aware that I was still shaking so I gave him a weak smile as my little experiment caught up with me and the anxiety pulled some tears from my eyes.

          He quickly set the rifle by its case before he pulled me in for a hug and holding my head to his chest. His heart beat was slow and relaxed, and my racing heart thumped loudly in my ears as I sighed and leaned into him. He carefully lifted me off my feet and carried me back to the booth for the short range weapons. His mask came up again and he gave me a rough, closed lipped kiss.

          “Why didn’t you stay in the car?” he asked, some worry in his tone as he wiped at the damp streaks on my cheeks.

          “I wanted to see how close I could get without freaking out,” I sighed as he held my face to his to obscure it from anyone who might be watching us. “I won’t lie, your jacket is probably the only reason I could leave the car. And what I did earlier to calm my nerves was imagine you holding me.”

          He gripped my back tightly, the leather creaking as a smile played at his lips.

          “I’ll see what I can do about getting you something to replace the jacket,” he giggled. “It’s a bit big on you. It would only get in the way of firing.”

          “You really have turned into a big softie,” I teased.

          The Lads had returned to whispering that behind his back and if he noticed, he didn’t let on because none of them had been beaten into the floor yet. As I said it though, I saw the flash of anger in his eyes and had enough time to wonder if I could run and hide before he could retrieve and reload his rifle before he visibly stifled the rage that was making his eyes shimmer.

          “Only for you Brie,” he murmured, hand slipping under the jacket so he could run his fingers across my skin. “I would do anything for you.”

          “You’re gonna make me cry,” I sniffed and he chuckled as tears welled in the corners of my eyes.

          “I love you,” he smiled before pulling me into a tight hug. “Even if it means catching shit because I went out and found a jacket that can help you be comfortable enough to heist with us. But think of the end results. You’re close combat skills and escape artist training with my weapon training and general ‘Vagabond’-ness. We could tear this city apart.”

          “You’ve put a lot of thought into this,” I giggled. “You think of a team name too?”

          “Nah,” he chuckled. “That’s usually the Lads job. They come up with the good ones.”


	16. Coming Home to a Night Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gah! So sorry this is late guys! I was really sick this weekend (I'm fine now. Thank you all for your concern) and couldn't update. So here it is, better late than never.  
> On a related note: I recently got a job and my schedule has me working long hours. So I might get slow on the updates just because I'm tired or got out of work late.

          “Tell me again what we’re doing?” I laughed as I adjusted the garter on my leg and let my black dress fall to the floor to see if anyone could see the knife I was trying to hide.

          “We’re going to a dinner party,” Jack said simply as she adjusted her strapless blue dress. “We’re invited every year and Geoff and I always go to get a read on the political climate of the underworld.”

          “Why am I coming?” I asked as Geoff came in from the bathroom adjusting his bowtie.

          “Because we get two invitations: One for me and a plus one, and another for Ryan and a plus one,” Geoff said and smiled at my confused laugh. “They always send one to ‘Vagabond’ as a joke and usually he just tears it up and laughs, but this year he figured he’d take you out on a real date.”

          “Woah hold on a second. There’s a lot going on here,” I chuckled and shook my head. “First off, Ryan wants to take me out in public and show off that Vagabond has a girlfriend?”

          “That’s what he told me,” Geoff laughed.

          “Okay, second: Ryan isn’t here,” I said as I knit my eyebrows together. “He’s been gone all week in San Andreas for some ‘escaped’ hits. He’s not due back for another two days.”

          “Well,” Jack grinned. “He got done early. His flight landed about an hour ago, and Lindsay picked him up. If he is on schedule, he should be almost here with the limo.”

          They both chuckled as my face lit up. This was the first time Ryan went on an away mission in the six months we’ve been together, and his radio silence had been more difficult to deal with than I had thought. I found myself just missing the sound of him breathing and began talking to Edgar at night just to break the uncomfortable silence that Ryan’s absence had brought to the apartment.

          Almost on cue, the door opened and in strode Ryan dressed to the nines and carrying a box in one hand. We each smiled as our eyes traveled along the other’s body, and I resisted the urge to go running into his arms. Instead, I calmly waited for him to set the box down and come to me.

          “Man, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” Ryan smiled as he pulled me into a tight hug.

          “You’re not looking half bad yourself,” I said as I fixed his tie.

          I sighed happily as he chuckled and kissed my forehead, his arms firmly wrapped around my waist as I leaned into his embrace. I tilted my head up just to get a look at him but was met with a tender kiss as one of his hands came up to cup my cheek.

          “I missed you,” I murmured before stepping away.

          “Missed you too. You look amazing Brie,” Ryan smiled as he held me at arm’s length and got a better look at my outfit.

          “Save it for later Romeo. What’s in the box?” Geoff teased, and Ryan rolled his eyes before letting go of me and turning to the package he had brought in.

          “It’s some gifts for Brie,” Ryan said with a nervous smile as he opened it up. “One is a planned gift for tonight and the other is a gift I didn’t know was ready, but it was waiting by the door when I got home.”

          “Close your eyes,” Ryan ordered, and I huffed as I followed his order. “The one _meant_ for tonight is the smaller one. As per my MO, I’m not about to roll into this party without a mask but I would like some real food right now, so I had Lindsay go looking for something suitable to my needs. I also had her look for something for you Brie because most of these people have never seen Sweetpea in person. Now open.”

          The first thing I saw was the half skull that covered Ryan’s face. Black and just as intimidating as his usual mask, it had a whole new creepy factor because it looked like the lower jaw had been removed. I could already see the worried glances from the other gangs as the specter of death walked through the crowd, but I saw the love in his eyes and any amount of fear from the mask disappeared.

          I finally pulled my eyes away from Ryan’s face and looked down at what he was holding in his hands. Another black, half face mask, but this one was adorned with feathers and strands of black beads hung down from the cheeks. Along the sides were longer strands that had some silver accents in them as well as what appeared to be small hair clips at the ends.

          “Did you tell her what to look for?” I asked as I took the mask from him and got a closer look at the beadwork.

          “Nope,” Ryan smiled, seeing how much I liked it. “I told her to pick something that she thought would fit you. I wonder if she knew you would pick the black lacy dress.”

          I looked down at the high-low, floor length dress that I had chosen, and I grinned at how well the mask would go with it.

          “I doubt she had that in mind,” I giggled as I slipped the mask over my face.

          The beads tickled my cheeks as I positioned it and Ryan reached out to clip the longer strands into sections of my hair.

          “If it wasn’t obvious before that you’re a couple, it sure as hell is now,” Geoff scoffed.

          “It’s about to get worse Geoff,” Ryan hummed playfully as he carefully turned me around.

          I heard him pull something fabric out of the box and my eyebrows raised as Jack and Geoff grinned from ear to ear.

          “I know it’s been a few months, and I’m sure you’ve gotten used to my jacket, but I finally found something that I think will be just as good at soothing your anxiety around guns.”

          As he spoke, he laid a peacoat across my shoulders, and I snorted when I glanced down and saw blue panels on the shoulders.

          “I asked the seamstress that makes my jackets to design something that would fit you the way you need it to,” Ryan explained as I put the coat on properly. “I remembered that you like the style, so I just kinda pointed her in the right direction. It’s got everything mine does: Extra interior pockets, Kevlar lining, and it’s fire resistant. The blue shoulders on the black base was her doing. I had no influence in that, so don’t accuse me of trying to make us match.”

          I giggled as I buttoned it up and my back and shoulders relaxed as it hugged me tightly, but not tight enough to restrict my movement. I certainly felt more comfortable as the warmth enveloped me and I settled into it like I would Ryan’s arms.

          “It’s perfect,” I smiled as I pulled the collar up around my face.

          “I’m glad you like it,” he sighed before pressing a kiss to the side of my head. “Now I’m going to go paint myself up a bit to further hide my face. I’ll be ready to go in like, ten minutes.”

          “You call him a softie at home, right?” Geoff winked as Ryan disappeared into the bathroom.

          “Of course I do,” I smiled and his usual response played loudly in my head.

_Only for you. I’ll do anything for you._

          “I hope that doesn’t get you into too much trouble,” Jack said slyly, eyebrows wiggling.

          “No,” I giggled. “Not anymore anyway.”

          “But it used to?” she continued to tease.

          “There have been some close calls,” I smirked. “I have many escape routes for the apartment just in case.”

          They snickered at me while I pulled my new coat off and folded it over my arm. The sun had only just set so the city was too warm still, but by the time we left this party it would be perfect. I couldn’t help my run my fingers over the soft wool and smile. I had honestly assumed he’d just get me a smaller version of his own leather jacket, and when a few months passed I figured he had seen how well I was managing with one of his and gave up his search. The fact that he had remembered my favorite coat style made my heart flutter and an affectionate warmth pooled in my chest. When he had broken into my home and handled me so roughly our first night together, it had never occurred to me that he was capable of something so sweet. So selfless.

          He was still Vagabond though. His body count was still as high as it usually is, and I had even walked into the Bunker after a particularly brutal torture session. The man he had taken was a drug dealer who had gotten caught cutting flour into the cocaine he was selling, and the big gangs he was selling to wanted him ‘taken care of’. I knew this man was also a rapist with a history of domestic abuse, so I felt no pity for him, but walking into the room and seeing Ryan standing over a body bag and covered in blood hit me harder than I thought it would. It took a few nights before I stopped dreaming of him looking like that with me strapped to the chair and giving me that wild, predatory look I knew he used to control his victims. He had been so convinced that he had finally chased me away that I caught him making a list of hits to take. Preparing for a few weeks of carnage to numb his pain. The relief in his eyes when I reassured him that I wasn’t leaving him was enough to bring tears to my eyes, and he was so reluctant to let me go that we ended up sleeping on the couch that night.

          I was so caught up in thinking about how lucky I was to find someone who cared for me so much that I didn’t notice Ryan emerge from the bathroom and I jumped slightly when he hooked a finger under my chin and lifted my eyes to meet his.

          “You okay there?” he asked with a crooked smile. “You were zoned out pretty hard.”

          “Yeah. Just thinking,” I smiled back as I took in his modified face paint.

          He had filled in his eye sockets like normal, but he had contoured his cheekbones and jawline to make him appear more gaunt and angular. Under the inevitably dim party lights, you’d never be able to make out his actual face shape without touching him. Years of theater work had also made him a pretty decent make-up artist. Or at least that what he told me.

          “Anything we need to talk about?” he asked, still smiling but I could see a flicker of worry in his eyes.

          “No. Just thinking about you,” I laughed softly as I took his arm and followed Jack and Geoff to our waiting limo.

          “That doesn’t exactly make me worry less,” he whispered in my ear as we took the elevator down.

          I remained silent, not wanting to tell him the truth and be mercilessly teased by the other two Fakes, and I could tell it put him on edge. I gave him a reassuring squeeze and smiled sweetly to sooth his nerves. His eyes met mine and it seemed to do the trick because his shoulders relaxed and he returned my smile. Once in the car and on our way, I leaned against him and spoke quietly.

          “I was just wondering what I did to deserve you.”

          “Is that all? You made me nervous over that?” he chuckled quietly and pressed a kiss to the top of my head as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

          “Would you rather I said it in the elevator and hear about it for the rest of the night from those two?”

          “No. I suppose not,” he said, and I could tell he was smiling even as he buried his face into my hair and held me closer.

          “I do have one, kinda big question though,” I sighed. “I know it’s a bit late to turn back, but are you really sure you want to make it known that Vagabond has a girlfriend? I know we’ve gotten comfortable, but this was one of the big things you were afraid of, wasn’t it?”

          Ryan was quiet for a few minutes while he thought about what he wanted to say. His thumb rubbed my shoulder idly and I relished the feeling of his breath in my hair. He eventually pulled away and locked eyes with me.

          “Yes. For both,” he began softly but with conviction. “It was something that I was worried about. I was worried that you wouldn’t be able to protect yourself against anyone who would come after you, and I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to save you if anyone took you. But now I know you can hold your own. I know you’re always prepared for anything that might try to sneak up on you.”

          Without looking, Ryan laid his hand on my thigh directly on the handle of the dagger. He gave me a knowing wink and a sly smile as he slowly slid his hand down the length of the blade and stopped when my dress was all there was between his palm and my leg. I saw his eyes flick to his hand, then to Geoff and Jack who were across from us engrossed in their own conversation. His fingers twitched and I could tell he was considering slipping his hand under my dress. After a moment of thought, he decided against it.

          “I want to warn you though,” Ryan said seriously. “I _do_ still have a reputation to uphold. While I’m not going to be cold and distant, I won’t be as affectionate as I usually am. While I’m okay with everyone knowing I’ve found someone who can tolerate _this_.”

          Ryan gestured broadly to himself and I giggled. He smiled sweetly as if my laughter was music to his ears and I wondered if he missed me as much as I missed him.

          “But I’m not okay with them thinking I’m soft or distracted,” he continued with a lopsided grin. “I just wanted to let you know before we get there and you feel like I’m shutting you out. Believe me, there’s nothing I want more than to give you a special night out for our six month anniversary and make up for the week I’ve been gone, but you deserve a night out kind of date. We can only have so many candle lit dinner’s at home before they stop being special. Besides, you more or less fell in love with Vagabond and got all the sweet stuff as a bonus.”

          “I mean, I can’t think of a way to argue that, and we could watch shitty movies until our brains melt out of our ears and it would still be a special date,” I smiled and was cut off by a kiss.

          Every ounce of desire that we had pent up over the week threatened to burst through right then and there. I could feel it in the way Ryan tensed up like he was restraining himself and it was taking more concentration to keep out of his lap than I wanted to admit, but we didn’t stop. Every soft kiss wound us up like turning a key on a music box but there was no chance of releasing that tension. His fingers dug into my thigh and rather than hurt, it only made the fire burning in my chest grow hotter.

          “Okay. I’m putting and end to this now before we see something we don’t want to see,” Geoff said suddenly.

          Ryan and I jumped like he had appeared out of nowhere and Jack laughed as we remembered exactly _why_ we couldn’t tear each other’s clothes off.

          “You couldn’t cut the sexual tension with a chainsaw,” Jack teased.

          I let my head drop to Ryan’s chest and hid my face as his low chuckle added to the aforementioned tension. He released my thigh and the hand on my shoulder slid down to my waist as he sat back in his seat to face the other two.

          “I need to set some ground rules for you two anyway,” Geoff huffed with a tired smile. “I know I don’t need to tell you not to be sucking face all night and I know I don’t need to tell you not to start anything with the other guests, but I do need to warn you that _you two_ will be stared at _all night._ I know neither of you are overly fond of being watched like that, but this is the first time Vagabond has shown up to the party _and_ he’s brought along a lady. Ryan, you need to make your relationship with Brie very obvious. Let everyone in the room know she’s yours as soon as possible, that way we can avoid a situation where someone hits on Brie without knowing the horrible mistake they’ve just made.”

          “Now Brie, on the off chance someone still tries, you need to take care of them,” Geoff continued. “If you can show everyone that you’re not just some defenseless lamb that has wandered into the wolf’s den, you can worry less about people coming after you to get to Ryan. Don’t go looking for a fight, but if one finds you, don’t be afraid to flex a little. We’ve got your back if things get too sketchy.”

          “I think we can do all that,” I smirked and cast a glance to Ryan only to find him wearing the same look. “Anything else?”

          “Nope,” Geoff said with a shake of his head. “This is a date night for you two, so I won’t ask you to mingle or anything like that. Jack and I are more familiar with how this party usually goes anyway, and if everyone is too busy trying to figure out how Vagabond grew a heart and how someone could love a man like him, it’ll be nice and easy to sneak around and eavesdrop.”

          “I’m glad we could be bait for you,” I rolled my eyes.

          “The two of you coming was his idea,” Geoff sneered playfully. “I’m just taking advantage of the situation.”

          “Ignore him and just try to enjoy yourselves tonight,” Jack said sweetly. “Brie has been going stir crazy at the house with only Edgar, so I’m sure you have plenty to talk about.”

          “’Cuz murder makes for interesting dinner conversation,” Geoff snorted but paused when he saw the guilty look on my face and the wry smile on Ryan’s. “Do you two seriously discuss murder and work over food? What the hell is wrong with you?”

          “It’s not like we go into gory details,” I muttered. “And data surfing isn’t exactly interesting conversation. Besides, I’ve never been to San Andreas, so we can avoid the death talk tonight and focus on that if it will make you feel better Geoff.”

          Ryan chuckled at the sarcasm that dripped from my mouth as I teased Geoff and the older man just threw his hands in the air with an exasperated huff.

          “You two are freaks,” he smiled. “Love you to death.”


	17. Public Appearance

          Geoff and Jack continued to fill us in on exactly what we were walking into, so when we pulled up to a swanky restaurant surrounded by armed guards, Ryan only bristled a little bit. I wasn’t thrilled at the idea either, but Geoff assured us that it kept the peace inside.

          “Mr. Ramsey!” an overly cheery voice said as Geoff stepped out of the limo. “And I’m assuming you brought Miss Patillo?”

          “Of course,” Geoff said politely as he took Jack’s hand and helped her out before offering his hand to me.

          “Now Geoff, you know the rules,” the host scolded as I exited the car. “You only have one ‘plus one’, and only Vagabond can use his invitation. So, I have to ask that your-”

          The man trailed off as Ryan stepped out behind me and surveyed his surroundings. I saw some of the guards’ eyes go wide and a few even adjusted their grip on their gun. The familiar rumble of Vagabond’s darkly humored chuckle made the host’s color fade a little bit more, as if before that it could have been a fake Vagabond.

          “Looks like some of those guards are beginning to wonder if this gig is still worth the pay,” I smirked as I stepped towards the host, who was still fixated on Ryan behind me.

          “And it looks like they’ve already marked you as a no show on the guestlist Vagabond,” I said as I took a peek at the guestlist, where the host was in the middle of checking off the ‘present’ box next to Geoff’s name.

          This seemed to pull the man from his shock and he quickly brought the clipboard to his chest, making a loud smacking noise as he glared at me.

          “And _who_ might you be?” he snapped like he was talking to a drunk that had wandered up to him.

          “His ‘plus one’,” I shrugged. “You can put me down as Sweetpea.”

          “Relationship: Crew Member,” the host muttered to himself as he filled out my information.

          “Girlfriend,” Ryan said bluntly, giving the man a lazy glare.

          “Pardon?” he asked, voice cracking with surprise.

          “Relationship: Girlfriend,” Ryan corrected again and wiggled his finger like he was writing. “Now are we done here? I just got back from tying up loose ends in San Andreas and I would appreciate a meal that doesn’t come from a plastic bag.”

          I couldn’t tell if the irritation in his voice was from saying our relationship status out loud in public, or if he was actually that hungry. I glanced up at him and immediately knew which one it was. I smirked as the host looked to me for help, but I knew better than to get in the way of Ryan and food.

          “Y-yes Sir,” the man stammered before clearing his throat to continue. “That is all I needed. You all are clear to go in. Enjoy your evening!”

          “That is the most frazzled I’ve ever seen him, and last year the Hyena’s were invited,” Jack giggled.

          “Why on Earth would you invite them?” Ryan snorted as I took his arm and let him lead me up to the building.

          “I believe they mentioned something along the lines of ‘to foster good will’,” Geoff scoffed.

          “You mean they wanted to get on the Hyena’s good side so that they wouldn’t be attacked anymore,” I rolled my eyes.

          “Can you blame them?” Jack asked. “If the Hyena’s really put their minds to it, they could even take _us_ down.”

          “They wouldn’t,” I said shortly as the person checking coats took mine while casting a nervous glance at Ryan.

          “Why not?” Ryan asked curiously.

          “They owe me,” I smiled. “And Osiris knows I’m capable of ruining him if he crosses me before I can cash that favor in.”

          “Further proof that you can defend yourself in my absence,” Ryan tugged me a little closer to his side and gave me a sidelong look that made my fingertips tingle.

          “Really Vagabond?” Geoff chuckled as the four of us were lead to the dining hall. “Was it really ever a concern? You started dating because she had the balls to fuck with you and the ability to evade you when you showed up _to fucking kill her.”_

          “Yeah,” Ryan and I smiled wistfully, and he kissed the top of my head which made the usher’s eyes almost pop out of their head.

          “You two are about to break everyone in that room,” Jack grinned as she watched the usher too.

          “Perfect,” Ryan winked. “I always love it when I walk into a room and am greeted by silence.”

          Sure enough, as soon as we turned the corner into the dining hall, a few people caught sight of us and went quiet and when everyone else saw them, they turned to see who had shown up and laid eyes on Vagabond. We had barely taken three steps when the last conversation was cut short by the appearance of _the_ deadliest man in Los Santos with a woman on his arm. I felt a small blush bloom on my cheeks as the feeling of a hundred pairs of eyes scoured my body. Ryan gently nudged me with his elbow and I turned my attention to him. He dipped down to whisper in my ear and his loving tone took away my nerves.

          “Don’t let them get to you. Their stares are just as much for me as they are you. Let’s not let a room full of dickheads ruin our night. But if it gets to be too much, I’m more than willing to take you up on that movie idea.”

          I giggled softly and leaned into the kiss he pressed to my hair. He gently squeezed the hand I had on his forearm before letting go to pull my chair out for me. The conversations at the tables around us halted as they watched Vagabond play the gentleman as we got situated and ordered our drinks. The waiter looked personally affronted when we rejected the wine without even looking at it and I could tell that Ryan was getting a kick out of derailing an entire room because every time he glanced around the room I saw his eyes sparkle with mischievous joy.

          Though it felt a little awkward at first, eventually the room decided that Vagabond wasn’t there to shoot them and it started to feel like a normal date. A bubble of privacy developed around us and we discussed our week apart. His was far more interesting of course, but he really seemed to enjoy my retellings of the shenanigans the Lads and I had gotten into.

          It wasn’t until we paused conversation so we could eat more than a bite every two minutes that I realized why. I suddenly felt guilty for complaining about being lonely at the house. I still had Edgar, and I had the rest of the Fake AH Crew at the hideout, but he had no one. He couldn’t even call or text anyone here to keep him company. I’m sure that every time before we started dating was a piece of cake for him and the lack of communication didn’t bother him beyond knowing whether or not there was a problem at home, but I was willing to bet good money that he came home early this time because he missed me and everyone here.

          “I missed you,” I said out of nowhere and startled Ryan enough that he jumped slightly.

          He continued to chew thoughtfully as he decided how to react to this verbally, but his eyes returned my sentiments and it was good enough for me. I could stare into his eyes all night and be content.

          “What brought that on?” he asked with small smile that could be easily mistaken as teasing, but I recognized it as the same sweet smile that I get when he has to wake me up.

          “I was just thinking,” I shrugged.

          “That could be dangerous,” he rumbled, now actually teasing me. “Knowing you, you’d follow a train of thought and be zoned out for the rest of the night. How am I supposed to enjoy our date if you’re off in your own world?”

          “Shut up!” I hissed. “I’m not that bad. Even if I was, I wasn’t on a track that would have lasted all night.”

          “The fact that you know it would last that long tells me that you _could_ get that lost in your own thoughts that long.”

          “I don’t get lost!”

          “I know Baby,” he said with a wink. “I’m just messing with you.”

          I pressed my lips into a fine line in an attempt to hide my smile but he was distracted, looking around the room to see who was watching and I could see him thinking about something. Once he was content with whatever he was looking for, he took my hand in his and brought it to his lips. A few people saw this and a few, kind smiles broke out around us. I felt my heart flutter as he let our joined hands rest on the table and they remained there for the rest of dinner, his thumb occasionally brushing across my knuckles.

          “You look so beautiful tonight,” he muttered absentmindedly, head in his hand as he looks at me with glassy eyes and a smile.

          “What happened to not being as affectionate?” I warned, fully aware of the looks Puppy Love Vagabond was getting.

          He sighed heavily as he realized what he looked like and leaned back in his chair, finally letting go of my hand even though neither of us wanted to lose the touch.

          “You really missed me didn’t you?” I smiled sweetly.

          “Of course I did,” he huffed like I said something insulting. “I’ve spent most of the last six months with you. I may have been working most of my time in San Andreas, but my downtime was boring without you. Bad movies are only so entertaining by yourself with no one to complain to. And any cheap, cold motel room would be better with you in it.”

          “Awe,” I blushed and looked away from the adoring look he was giving me.

          “I handled it better than you though apparently,” he grinned. “At least I didn’t start talking to the dog.”

          “It’s too quiet without you home,” I sighed with an eye roll. “Pardon me for trying to make up for it. It just didn’t feel right, not having you there. It’s like I was out of place and I don’t belong there without you.”

          “You will always belong in my home,” he said quickly, and sharply like I was suggesting something crazy. “You’ve made too big of a mark on my life to not belong with me and in my home. _Our home._ I can’t even imagine not having you there anymore. You’re a part of my life now, and no physical distance between us will change that.”

          He said it all seriously with a flat, almost annoyed, look on his face and continued his Vagabond “act” for the people who were inevitably listening in, but the look in his eyes was the sincerest declaration of love I had ever seen from him. His body said I belonged with him, and his eyes screamed that he belonged to me just as much.

          “Well isn’t that sweet,” and oddly familiar voice teased, and Ryan’s eyes immediately snapped to the source with a snarl but he quickly lightened up.

          “Burnie Burns you son of a bitch!” Geoff said, quickly rising from the table near us to give the newcomer a big hug.

          I looked over the man, tall, built similarly to Ryan, and his curly hair must be what Michael’s aspires to be. I smiled politely while I racked my brain for who he was exactly, other than the host of this party. It slowly started to come to me as I watched Geoff interact with his old friend.

          Burnie and Geoff had been in a crew a decade ago, and when Burnie started managing multiple different crews at once, Geoff decided it was time to go out and start the Fakes. Geoff wanted his own crew that didn’t need to answer to anyone other than him. Burnie was surprisingly willing to let Geoff go off on his own, but he kept tabs on them. Now I knew why I recognized his voice. He had been one of my first buyers and regularly bought information on how and what the Fakes were doing, and before they had been a great power like they are, I had no problem giving away what I knew about the Fakes for a reasonable price. He must have notice my attention because once the conversation lulled, Burnie looked right at me and gave me a questioning eyebrow.

          “It’s been a while _Church,_ ” I smirked and his eyes widened a bit.

          “You remember that?” he grinned and leaned on the back of my chair.

          “Of course I recognize the voice that lined my pockets for my first year in operation,” I said slyly.

          “I would have paid you more if I knew what you were working with kiddo,” he smiled and pat my head affectionately. “Word on the grapevine is that you were working with bare minimum tech and barely breaking even between buying and selling. And after what happened? I would have let you into the Roosters if I thought you wanted it.”

          “I need in your grapevine so I can wipe all this information,” I grumbled. “I don’t like having any of my information out there without my knowledge. What do you mean ‘after what happened’?”

          “After Swords and the whole Tarot incident,” Burnie said simply.

          A fire lit under my skin and suddenly I was filled with rage. How did he know? I made sure to wipe all information from that night off the face of the planet, even going as far as to sneak into LSPD to destroy case files and morgue notes.

          “What?” I asked through grit teeth, barely able to contain my anger.

          I felt a hand touch mine and Ryan tried to loosen my balled fist, but it was no use, I could feel my nails digging into my palm. I stiffly rose from my chair to face Burnie and I could hear Geoff and Ryan give me words of warning as I squared up to the biggest name in Los Santos. Burnie looked worried for a fraction of a second before putting on a cool, passive mask.

          “I’ll tell you once you calm down a bit Sweetpea,” he said calmly, there was no anger in his tone and I knew he wasn’t upset. I wish I could say the same for my own voice.

          “No,” I said with icy conviction. “You’re going to tell me now, because I went to great lengths to make sure _no one_ ever knew about that without it coming straight from my mouth. Cups and Coins were good boys and kept their mouths shut about the whole situation and it was easy for me to clean up.”

          “Not anymore,” Burnie said flatly as he saw I wasn’t going to back down. “Coins has hardly shut up about it since your little altercation at the docks. You’re lucky we all knew Swords was a monster, or it might be a bigger deal. No one cares about the ranting of a wounded lover, especially because it was Swords. The whole underground knows what happened that night, we’ve known since the day after, but it wasn’t until recently that Coins started going off and telling everyone that Wands is now going by Sweetpea.”

          “Kiddo,” Burnie said softly, placing both hands on my shoulders to stop my shaking. “What he did to you was absolutely horrendous, and no one blames you for reacting the way you did except for Coins. By getting this mad about it you’re only playing into the dickhead’s hands. He thinks he’s getting revenge for some wrong that never happened, but all he’s doing is pissing off a very dangerous enemy. I understand wanting to silence him, but he’s just being petty. Save your anger for when he does something more than talk a big game.”

          My body felt cool now that the fire of rage was doused. My fingers ached as I released my fists and immediately I felt Ryan’s fingers checking the marks my nails left. Burnie held my gaze for a few more moments before patting my shoulder and turning to Ryan.

          “I am in no way surprised that you fell for her,” he said with a teasing smirk. “I’ve kept my eye on Sweetpea for years now. She’s the only person who could rival me in influence, and she didn’t get here through luck. You’re two sides of the same coin. A very violent, stubborn coin.”

          A few people looked alarmed at Burnie’s casual reference to my power, like they hadn’t realized that I was more than just some computer nerd that attracted the Fake’s lead murderer. I was the dawning realization that Vagabond had a new weapon to use against them.

          “I bet you were worried that she would be a target because of you. Am I right Vagabond?” Burnie continued, smile growing as Ryan gave him a reluctant nod. “Well anyone dumb enough to do that deserves the death that swiftly comes for them. Now do me a favor and stop pretending you’re too big and bad to touch your girlfriend. I can see you reining yourself in from across the room.”

          Ryan gave him an angry growl but looked away, clearly giving away how right Burnie was. I giggled as I went to sit back down but was cut off by Ryan taking my hand.

          “Fine. No more reigning in my feelings,” he grinned wolfishly.

          Before Geoff could voice his protest and before I knew what was happening, there was the unmistakable sound of chair legs skidding across the floor and I was yanked to the other side of the table. Ryan was prone to things like this, surprising me by whisking me away and throwing me around, so I simply let myself follow his lead so that I didn’t get hurt. I got chills as he pulled me down into his lap and his low chuckle filled my ears. A warm kiss was pressed against my cheek as laugher rose from the other tables, surely from the dumbstruck look on my face as I settled into his arms.

          I felt very shy suddenly, the eyes of everyone in the room as they watched the way Ryan wrapped one arm around my waist and draped the other lazily across my legs to keep me on his lap making me self-conscious.

          “What happened to appearing soft and distracted?” I asked nervously.

          “I love you. That’s what happened,” he muttered as he let out a long sigh and sounding like he had been holding his breath. “And it’s been so hard to keep my hands to myself. I’ve been gone a week and all I want is to spend the evening with you in my arms.”

          “Do you wanna go home?” I smiled sweetly. “Cuz I’m sure no one wants to see us like this all night.”

          “Not yet,” he muttered as he laid his head on my shoulder. “Surprisingly enough, I do have friends in other crews that I bet are here.”

          “Funhaus?” I asked.

          “Yeah. And the rest of the Roosters,” he hummed. “I was almost a Rooster too, but Burnie saw my… _methods_ and thought I was better suited to be a Fake so he introduced me to Geoff.”

          “Is that why you didn’t immediately jump him when he touched me?”

          “No,” Ryan snorted. “I didn’t jump him because he wasn’t hurting you and I know better than to get in the face of Burnie Burns. Something _you_ need to realize was a very bad decision.”

          “I’m not afraid of him,” I smiled.

          “And that’s your problem,” Ryan said, looking at me very seriously. “Because you really should be. You may have the favors to pull to take him, but he doesn’t need favors. He can just snap his fingers and crews come to his aid, including the crews you have favors with, and they will choose him over you every time. I’ll do anything for you Sweets, including fight Burnie, but we wouldn’t win that fight.”

          “Yeah. You’re right,” I sighed as I watched him lean over Jack and Geoff’s table while they talked. “But it’s hard to be afraid of him. I wasn’t kidding when I said he lined my pockets. He also single handedly funded my ability to live for the first two years after Swords. I think he knew I was going through hard times because sometimes he’d call for really simple information, pay twice what I was asking, and then talk to me if he could tell I was upset.”

          “He’s a good judge of character,” Ryan muttered. “He’s also a sucker for a girl in distress. I’m not saying he was hoping for something to happen with you, but he certainly wouldn’t have been able to look at himself in the mirror if he didn’t try to help you.”

          Suddenly there was a hand on my shoulder, making me jump in Ryan’s arms as Burnie butt into our conversation.

          “Better be careful Vagabond,” he hummed. “I hear you talking behind my back like that again and we could have problems.”

          Ryan pulled away to argue but was met with a big, playful grin and grumbled instead.

          “Now, on to matters that I think will interest the two of you,” Burnie smirked, keeping his voice down to a whisper. “Geoff tells me that you’ve been gone all week and have a mighty need to spend some _alone time_ with your beautiful little lady. He also tells me that you have no shame in wandering to a private place and having your way with her.”

          “One time,” I huffed. “We lock the door and fuck in my office once and we’re labeled as sexual deviants.”

          “Oh no,” Burnie shook his head. “I was also told about how you two got together. I’m pretty sure you started off as deviants.”

          “What are you getting at Burns?” I growled as Ryan stifled a grin at my blush.

          “Rye. There’s a door in the far corner. You see it?” Burnie asked and continued after Ryan located the door. “It leads to a hall way full of smaller dining rooms meant for private parties. The room is about to get darker and everyone is going to get up to dance and shit. Now I’m not _telling_ you to go have your own private party, because I get the feeling Geoff wouldn’t approve, but I am letting you know that they’re there if you two decide you need time to yourselves.”

          “Much appreciated,” Ryan winked. “I’ll be sure to tell Geoff we stumbled upon them.”

          “And I’ll be sure to distract him if it looks like he’s figuring out where you are,” Burnie winked back. “Just don’t make too big of a mess in there. We deep clean them because at least one couple uses them like this every year, but it doesn’t mean it’s not gross when a mess is left behind.”

          “I think we can do that,” I smirked. “Thank you, Burnie.”

          “Don’t worry about it. I’m always happy to facilitate a good time. Especially if it’ll bother Geoff.”

          With a final wink, he disappeared into the crowd of standing guests who were anticipating the dim lights and music that Burnie said would be coming. Ryan carefully helped me out of his lap and stood so he could stretch his legs. After giving me a big hug and a few sweet kisses in our new cover of darkness, he took my hand and lead me through the crowd.

          Ryan stopped to talk to the Funhaus crew, but I found myself people watching as he talked about things that happened long before I showed up. We were still getting some interesting looks, and quite a few people looked him over appreciatively. After the fifth woman to walk by immediately stared at his ass, I decided it was time to get an adequate look at my boyfriend.

          The dress pants were familiar, the same ones that he wore on our “first date” and they did do good things for his already attractive rear, not to mention the way they made his thighs look amazing too. The white button up and black suit jacket were also a little form fitting and his broad shoulders and thick biceps were framed beautifully. I wondered if he owned any loose fitting clothes, but quickly disregarded the thought because I didn’t want him to wear any loose clothes. He was too good to look at to hide under a baggy sweatshirt.

          The way he had his hand in his pocket, stance shifted to one side as he favored his left leg while he talked to Kovic and Elyse, his posture straight and authoritative even though he was talking to friends. It all made him look like he was modeling the suit rather than actually attending the party. I couldn’t wait to see what he looked like with each part removed one by one.

          I was pulled from my thoughts by a soft kiss and a low chuckle as I squeaked in surprise. I returned the second kiss as Ryan guided me away from where the Funhaus crew was sitting. He took my hand and guided me to the dancefloor. Only then did I realize that a slow song had come on and my heart fluttered as I realized what was happening.

          He pulled me to his chest, hands firmly holding my hips as he started to sway to the music. I lace my fingers together behind his head and pulled his forehead to mine. It was a little weird with the masks, but it wasn’t enough to stop us, and he melted into me as we fell into sync with the other dancers.

          “I love you,” I whispered as his body gently rocked against mine.

          “I love you too,” he sighed back.

          In this moment he was happy, with a small smile on his face as he let himself get lost in my eyes. I pulled away after a moment to rest my head on his chest and I felt his cheek press against the top of my head. I felt him sigh and his shoulders relaxed under my hands as I nuzzled his chest. The song ended too soon, and we left the dancefloor rather reluctantly. Ryan cast a glance around the room before smiling down at me.

          “Private party time?” he whispered.

          “Private party time,” I smiled, but he was already pulling me to the wall behind the crowd.


	18. High/Low

          He looked around carefully and quietly pushed the door open so we could slink in. The door was barely closed before he had me pinned to the wall with his body. I didn’t hold back my moan and he smiled into my lips as his hands explored me greedily. I gasped as his fingers found the zipper of my dress and slowly pulled it down. I tried to guide him to one of the rooms, but there was no escaping him as he pressed me to the wall hard enough that is creaked from the weight. As much as I was panicking about someone catching us, I loved it when he was pushy like this and he knew it.

          “Let’s get this out of the way. I’ve been dying to do this all night,” Ryan hummed seductively as he pulled the high collar of my dress away.

          The top of my dress fell to my hips, leaving my torso exposed save for the strapless bralette that I was wearing. I could hear the music faintly over the sound of Ryan leaving hickies along my neck and my racing heartbeat. He bit hard and I fought back a loud moan, which made him groan. His hand fumbled around, searching for a doorknob while refusing to leave my neck long enough to actually look around. Finally, he found one and I was practically thrown into the room.

          I giggled as I stumbled into the room, catching myself on the table. I spun around and grinned at Ryan as he locked the door and threw his mask onto a chair. The table shifted back an inch or two as he collided with me and forced himself between my legs. He lifted me up by my thighs and sat me on the edge of the table, leaning me back slightly and tugging my bralette down enough to free my breasts. I wrapped my legs around his waist and moaned as his lips wrapped around my nipple and the other hand began massaging my other breast. He looked up at me with eyes heavy with desire, and his hand pushed my skirt up as he kissed across my chest and started working my other side.

          “Lay back Baby,” he said breathlessly, sounding almost like he was begging rather than ordering me to do so.

          I laid back on the table and felt goosebumps raise from the cold table on my bare back. Ryan kissed a slow trail down my belly while his hands carefully tugged my panties down. He threw them to the side as he dropped to his knees between my legs. My toes curled in anticipation of what was to come and I involuntarily shuddered as he nuzzled the inside of my thighs and left angry red marks with his teeth.

          The room spun when he was done teasing me and slowly dragged his tongue through my folds. My moan was long and sharp and I was overcome with pleasure as I felt him shudder from my reactions. After a few minutes of testing the waters, Ryan slowly pushed a finger inside of me and groaned into me as I tightened around his finger and moaned loudly. I’m sure someone outside heard me, even if just faintly, but I couldn’t hold it in. Ryan knew just how to make me melt into his hands, and he was doing all he could to make me as vocal as possible despite our location. I covered my mouth as he made it impossible to hold back, and I felt his smile against my sensitive skin. As if he knew I was on the verge of insanity, he slipped in a second finger and chuckled at my twitching legs and barely contained groans.

          I bit down on my thumb to stop myself from moaning his name, and he hummed happily as he massaged my clit from both sides. His fingers slowly rubbed from deep within me while his tongue moved expertly over the sensitive bundle of nerves to bring me to climax just the way he wanted. It was slow and I felt it from a mile away, but I didn’t want to ask him to go faster. I loved the way he felt between my legs and the attention he gave me while down there. When I finally came, I was sure people would hear me in the main room, even through my hand it echoed in the small room and Ryan’s groan of pleasure as I shook around him also was barely restrained.

          “Your makeup is ruined,” I teased breathlessly as he stood and kissed around my hips.

          “Good thing I brought the stuff to fix it,” he rumbled before licking his lips. “While I didn’t anticipate this, I did figure we would find a quiet corner to make-out in. Geoff’s concerns aren’t totally unfounded. We really are like teenagers.”

          “I haven’t blown you behind the bleachers yet,” I giggled and was silenced by Ryan’s fingers slipping past my lips.

          I whimpered as my own bitter taste filled my mouth and I looked up at Ryan as he watched me suck his fingers clean.

          “I’ll have to keep that in mind the next time we wander out to the race track,” he grinned, eyes fluttering as my tongue swirled around his digits.

          I pulled away from his fingers with a light pop as an idea formed in my mind. There was nothing I could do to get him to be as loud as I was just a few minutes ago, even at home he never got all that loud, but I knew how to get him somewhere close to that. If I was going to have to go out and face everyone after what they just heard, it was only fair that a few people who were close to the private rooms got to hear Vagabond beg.

          His eyebrows raised as I sat up and hopped off the table. I overestimated my ability to stand yet and Ryan had to catch me before my wobbly knees gave out. I pulled him into a deep kiss and he sighed into my lips as my hands slowly made their way down his chest, unbuttoning his shirt as I went. His hands carefully unclipped my mask and he tossed it to the side with his own. I gently drug my nails down his exposed chest as he cupped my face in both hands, and he whimpered into our deepening kiss.

          “If you wanted sex, you should have stayed up on the table,” he murmured before biting my lip.

          “I don’t want sex,” I whispered as I slowly turned him and pinned him to the table. I got another eyebrow quirk as I pulled away and he saw the devious look in my eyes.

          “I hope this will do in lieu of bleachers,” I smirked as I dropped to my knees in front of him.

          I wish I had a camera ready, because the stunned look he gave me was priceless. His mouth fell open slightly as he leaned back against the table and watched me unbuckle his belt and pull his pants to his knees. Goosebumps peppered his thighs as I pulled his briefs down and I smiled at the shiver that rolled through him as I wrapped my fingers around the shaft of his hard cock. He gripped the table with one hand as he melted into my touch and his knees shook.

          “Is this how bad you missed me?” I teased, slowly stroking his length. “Enough that all it takes is a little touch to turn you to putty in my hand?”

          “Fuck Baby. Yes,” he whined and his chest started to heave as his heartrate skyrocketed. “I missed your touch so much. I needed you the entire time I was there.”

          “Tell me more,” I grinned before slowly dragging my tongue across the tip.

          Ryan’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and a content smile spread across his face as he shuddered under my control. The table creaked as it took his full weight when I took the tip into my mouth and let my tongue trace around the head. He wasn’t exactly sitting on the table, but he had lifted himself onto the edge to that it took his weight and not his feet. They were still planted on the floor, but his knees were weak from my teasing and the hand he had been using for balance was white knuckled around the edge.

          “I missed you so much Baby. The whole time I just wanted, Fuck-” he cut himself off with a swear as I started to bob on his cock, gradually taking him deeper into my mouth. “I just wanted to come back to my room and find you there waiting for me. Fuck. I wanted you to be in that shitty motel bed, ready to fucking deal with my tired ass and anything else I could ever need.”

          I laughed around him and he groaned as my throat rumbled against him. He fell mostly silent then, but I knew how to get what I wanted from him so the room was occasionally filled with his deep groans, long moans, and pleasured curses. I kept a moderate pace and I knew it was driving him wild. He was twitching and moaning at my every movement after several minutes.

          “Fuck. Baby, please. I need you,” he whined, louder than he meant to and I smiled after pulling away with a dramatic pop.

          “You have me,” I whispered before going back to my antagonizingly moderate pace.

          A low and throaty growl was my only warning before his hand took a hold of my head and made me move a little faster. I giggled and hummed as I rolled my eyes up to look at him, and the moment we made eye contact he moaned loudly. He took a fist full of my hair and gradually picked up the pace, his moans getting gravellier as he neared climax. When he finally tipped over the edge, Ryan’s whole body stiffened along with a pleasured grunt before a full body shudder left him melting into the table. I slowly pulled away, relishing the goosebumps that exploded across his skin as I kissed up his body while standing.

          His lips found mine as soon as I was standing, and his tongue eagerly invaded my mouth as he turned us around. The table creaked under our weight as he slid the two of us onto the surface and laid on top of me, our mouths never leaving each other. His belt buckle was cold against my thigh, but his chest was flushed and warm against mine. Our bodies rocked together and we lost track of time just enjoying our time alone.

          Eventually we pulled ourselves back together and I was sitting in the table giggling while Ryan fixed his make-up with the camera on my phone when a knock sounded against the door.

          “Guys,” Geoff called through the door and we both froze. “You’re going to want to come out and see what’s going on.”

          Luckily Ryan was almost done so I hopped off the table and cracked the door open. Geoff took one look at me and shook his head with a sad smile.

          “You two are the worst,” he snickered. “I told you no sucking face and what do you do? You find the fuck rooms and suck face.”

          “We were guided to the fuck rooms,” I smiled.

          “Either way, you weren’t subtle,” Geoff scoffed as Ryan slipped my mask over my face and began reclipping it to my hair. “No one can prove it was you, but people definitely heard _something_ that could have been construed as sex.”

          “Thank God,” I sighed as Ryan wrapped his arms around my waist. “I thought I was loud enough that people wouldn’t even question it.”

          “Wasn’t you they heard,” Geoff smirked and cast a glance up at Ryan. “I kept hearing people whisper about how hot Vagabond sounds, and I honestly want to kill myself.”

          “Sorry boss,” Ryan hummed before kissing the top of my head. “She knows how to push my buttons.”

          “I’d be angrier if you two weren’t so fucking perfect for each other, but you are and I can’t bring myself to get upset at you. The issue in the main hall, on the other hand, is absolutely livid about your relationship flaunting,” Geoff looked so worn out as he spoke.

          “What’s going on?” I asked and we stepped out of the room and my good mood sank as he rubbed his face in agitation.

          “Coins showed up and heard what you two not so conspicuously were doing back here,” Geoff said quickly, knowing he was setting me off. “He’s saying some really unsavory things about the two of you and while most people are ignoring him, he’s gathering attention.”

          “How long has he been here?” Ryan asked, holding me in place and stopping me from storming into the main room.

          “Only about twenty minutes,” Geoff said seriously and he eyed me cautiously. “Sweetpea, you need to watch yourself out there. Having you two here and causing a scene with your relationship is one thing, but I really can’t have you starting a fight here in front of everyone. Only retaliate if he swings first, and then make it quick.”

          “I’ll do my best,” I grunted, already shaking.

          “Baby,” Ryan said worriedly as he tried to rub my shoulders to get me to stop shaking.

          “I just want him to leave me, leave _us,_ alone,” I said as tears threatened to fall.

          “I know Sweetheart,” Ryan sighed as he turned me around to pull me into a hug.

          “Hopefully after tonight he’ll see that no one cares and he’ll drop it,” Geoff consoled as he rubbed my back.

          I nodded and took a deep breath to try and steady myself, but I was too far gone and I felt like I would blow up as soon as I saw Coins.

          “We need to find Burnie,” I grumbled. “I hate it, but I can hide in his influence. Coins is dumb, but he’s not dumb enough to start shit right in front of Burnie.”

          “You’re going to hide?” Geoff asked, stopping with his hand on the door to the main room to look at me with poorly hidden shock.

          “I don’t like it,” I snapped. “But if we’re going to leave here without a fight, I need to keep distance between us.”

          The three of us looked at each other with a tired apprehension that only put me even more on edge. The Lancer’s had been taking pot shots at Fake territories and properties, but other than being a light nuisance, Coins hadn’t done anything since the docks. It never occurred to me that he would have been invited to this party, I was too caught up in having an evening with Ryan to consider the possibility and now the past hour of bliss was washed away as we reentered the main room and eyes immediately snapped to me and Ryan.

          A few people gave us knowing smirks and winks and Ryan took it all in stride. He kept an arm wrapped around my waist and a proud smirk on his face, even as he scanned the room for Coins. I wasn’t nearly as composed, and my eyes actually started to hurt from how fast my eyes were darting around the room, trying to see Coins and keep him as far away as possible. I wanted to revel in the attention the way Ryan was pretending to, but I felt the crushing sensation of anxiety and fear take over my chest. I wanted to go back to the room and giggle with Ryan about how it was impossible to do eye makeup with your mouth closed.

          Eventually Ryan lead me to where Burnie and Gus were talking with Jack next to the tables where we ate dinner. The two men gave Ryan a wide grin and while Gus teased him about our clandestine interaction, Burnie watched me carefully. I found myself almost cowering into Ryan’s side, and it made me sick to my stomach. I just wanted to be happy, and all the love and joy from just a few minutes ago was totally obliterated by this dick with a grudge.

          “I’m sorry,” Burnie muttered to me. “The invitations were sent out before he started raising hell about you and Swords, and I didn’t think he would be dumb enough to do this.”

          “Swords got what was coming to him,” Gus interjected. “He was a dick who abused the people closest to him and manipulated everyone else to see him as a saint. He deserved to be beaten beyond recognition. The only shame is that this situation didn’t die with him.”

          “You can say that again,” I snorted despite myself.

          “Coins always was so far up his ass they might as well be the same person,” Gus continued, clearly trying to humor me and make me relax.

          “I wouldn’t know,” I huffed and held Ryan’s hand tightly. “I was never allowed out of the room without Swords. Any time spent with Coins and Cups was strictly business, but I was keenly aware of Coins’ glare.”

          “Because you were a mistake that Swords didn’t see until it was too late.”

          My blood ran cold as the deep baritone cut through the music and conversation like a red hot knife through foam. Everyone’s heads snapped to Coins, but I refused to turn around and look at him. If I didn’t see him, I could pretend he wasn’t there.

          “You should learn from his mistake Vagabond,” Coins continued and I felt Ryan’s hand stiffen in mine. “She’ll kill you the moment she no longer likes how you feel on top of her.”

          I bared my teeth in a vicious snarl as I felt fire flow through my veins. Geoff and Burnie’s eyes widened as they watched the rage take over my body. I stiffened up and braced for the fight I was sure was going to happen. I spun around to glare at Coins, but was only further infuriated by his smug smile.

          “She can’t even deny it,” he shook his head.

          “I killed Swords because I was tired of being used,” I growled and people around us started to give us space in preparation for a fight. “I killed him because he was killing me. It took the last of my energy, but I did it. If I hadn’t done it, I never would have and I’d be dead by now.”

          “Good.”

          “Fuck off Coins,” I snapped and got a raised eyebrow from the man in question. “I understand that you and Swords were close, and I understand that you saw me as a threat to your relationship with him and to the crew as a whole, but why the actual fuck are you holding onto it this hard? And why are you just being petty about it? It’s been five years Coins, grow a pair and either drop it or do something about it. You know how to get a hold of me, we can settle this without the involvement of everyone else.”

          “You mean that?” he hummed.

          “Yes,” I said before Ryan or Geoff could pull me aside. “I’m fucking tired of you dragging my friends, _my family,_ into your petty obsession with the human embodiment of a steaming pile of shit. What do you want from me Coins?”

          “I want you to suffer,” he said simply.

          “Well then we’re fucking even because you aren’t exactly making my life rainbows and fucking unicorns.”

          “It’s not enough.”

          “You’re not going to get enough,” I huffed.

          “Then I’ll just have to find a way,” he said smoothly, almost like he already had a plan.

          “Listen Coins,” Burnie stepped in with irritation clear in his tone. “I understand that you were invited, but I have the right to kick you the fuck out of here if all you’re going to do is stir shit up.”

          “I’ll leave,” Coins shrugged. “I figured the Fakes would be here, but I didn’t think _Sweetpea_ would fall into her old habits. Remember how Swords would pull you aside and make you moan like that? How long did he please you like that before you decided that Swords was a monster?”

          My blood ran cold as my brain shorted out. I couldn’t respond to that and Coins knew it, so all he did was smirk before turning around and walking away. The rest of the room went back to its conversations, albeit quieter and more nervously, but I just stared off into space.

_No. Yes, but no. Swords did do that and at first that was how I reacted, but six months later was when he started to turn abusive. Six months._

          I tried to stop my thought process, but it was too late. Coins had planted the seed and it sprouted quickly, fueled by my insecurity and anxiety. I was so lost that I didn’t remember going home, or getting ready for bed, or how long I tossed and turned in bed while Ryan slept beside me. Eventually I got up because I didn’t want to wake Ryan up with my restlessness.

          I made my way downstairs like a ghost in my own home and I felt my heart growing cold from the fear that Coins had put into me. I sat on the couch and pulled my knees up to my chin, wrapping my arms around my legs as I stared off into the dark. I was numb as my brain drew the similarities without my permission.

_Ryan would never hurt me like that. Ryan would never hurt me. Ryan would never do those things to me._

          But no matter how many times I told myself that, I couldn’t pull the weed Coins forced into my brain. It was creating cracks in my heart and I started shaking as my memories of Swords started to become images of Ryan, with that malicious glimmer in his eyes that I had seen that night I walked into the Bunker. I tried to stop the thoughts, but it was like trying to stop a car that had its brake lines cut. My breathing became shallow and fast as panic set in.

          “Brie?”

          I jumped out of my skin as Ryan’s sleepy voice broke through the darkness behind me. It was then that I realized that tears were streaming down my cheeks and that I was clutching my calves hard enough that blood starting to seep out from behind my fingers. I was so startled that a terrified gasp followed his groggy call.

          “Brie?” he said again, this time with worry replacing his drowsiness.

          The lights flicked on and I blinked as my eyes adjusted to it. The couch shifted beside me and I heard Ryan choke on his words as he looked at me. Once I could see, he looked terrified at what he saw. His eyes found mine and they swam with fear.

          “Baby what’s wrong?” he gasped and reached out to try to loosen my grip on my legs.

          Before I could process what was happening, I recoiled from him like he was going to hurt me. He froze in place and watched me with sorrowful eyes. I could see his heart breaking and he started to shake.

          “Brie,” he said breathlessly and his voice trembled. “Baby what’s going on? What’s wrong?”

_Stop this!_ I screamed at myself mentally. _Ryan would NEVER hurt you like Swords did. Ryan is everything Swords wasn’t and would do anything for you. Swords wouldn’t have even given you a second glance when you panicked. Ryan’s trying to help. He loves you._

          “Ryan,” I sobbed before throwing myself into his arms.

          He fell back against the arm of the couch as he enveloped me in a tight embrace. He rolled us over so that I was pressed between him and the back of the couch as he clung to me, letting me cry and scream into his chest while he covered the top of my head with kisses.

          “What Coins said, he…” I tried to explain but was rocked with a terrified shiver. “He knows how to get to me and he did. He made me think you were going to change and hurt me like Swords. I… I couldn’t stop it. Coins knows how to get to me and it worked. All he had to do was point out some similarities and my brain ran with it.”

          Ryan’s fingers dug into my body and his chest heaved as I felt the anger wash over him, suddenly I was afraid that Ryan would think I believed that he would turn on me.

          “I’m so sorry Ryan,” I sobbed. “I love you so much and I know you wouldn’t do that to me. I’m sorry I let him get to me. I’m sorry I ever thought you would hurt me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

          “Hush Sweetheart,” he whispered softly despite the fact that he was still trembling with rage. “It’s okay. It’ll be okay. I love you too and I’m sorry.”

          He answered before I could ask what he was apologizing for, and what he said made the whole world stop around us.

_“I’m sorry I let him live. I’m sorry I didn’t kill him at the docks when I had the chance.”_


	19. Making Bank

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man life is really kicking my butt right now. Sorry my updates have been all kinds off irregular lately. I've been trying to keep up through 40 hour work weeks and summer classes and it's starting to get difficult. BUT that isn't stopping me, so just bare with me here. We're reaching end game stuff in both my major fics (If you're into Minecraft/King's AUs, you should go check out my other story My King #ShamelessPlug) and I'm really looking forward to wrapping these up and putting them out there for y'all to enjoy! <3 NoelEnough

          “Alright you fucks,” Geoff grinned from the front seat. “Are we all clear on the plan? Y’all ready to do this?”

          The Lad’s made a bunch of noise that drowned out anything Ryan and I might have said, so I opted to just nod with a confident smile while I checked my gun for the thousandth time. It was a simple 22 caliber AR-15 that had barely any kick to it, but this job was going to require something a little more powerful than my pistol.

          This was my first big heist since Ryan and I had worked through my phobia of guns. I was still uncomfortable around big rifles, but I had worked myself up to this automatic weapon and with the coat Ryan had gotten for me, I could tolerate the 50-caliber rifle Ryan had at his feet.

          He laid his hand over mine and stopped my nervous fidgeting. I looked up at him, past the mask, and into his eyes. I could see that the corners were crinkled and I knew he was giving me a sweet smile to sooth my nerves. He leaned over as he wrapped his fingers around my hand.

          “You’re going to do great Sweets,” he whispered with a firm squeeze of his hand. “You’ve made great progress and I have no doubt that you’ll be just as good as Gavin.”

          I couldn’t help but snort and laugh as he chuckled. He removed his hand from mine and leaned back into his seat in the back of the van we were taking to the bank. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he began to focus on the task at hand.

          Maze Bank, or at least one of its smaller satellite locations, was our target tonight. I had gotten intel on this new location and was immediately convinced that we needed to hit it. The security system was so fresh that I could smell the plastic wrap through my computer as I looked over the layout of the facility. It was new, so bugs were bound to be in the programming for the vault doors and some of the cameras. All I had to do was tell Geoff that I could use those bugs in our favor and he was on board for the heist. I pulled my laptop out of the bag at my feet and booted it up in preparation for the initial hacking that I needed to do.

          I took a deep breath before sinking into my seat and starting to send in glitches that would be seen by anyone who would be watching the feeds. I was desensitizing them so that when we rolled in, they wouldn’t suspect anything was wrong until it was too late. While I let that run through its paces, I double checked the layout of the building and ensured that all potential exits are accounted for. I was trying to map out exit strategies when the van jostled roughly as Jack pulled us into a nearby alley. Like a pack of hungry dogs reacting to the dinner bell the Lads, Ryan, and I all perked up and looked to the front seat where Jack and Geoff were giving the area one last look before we initiated the plan.

          “Kick in the front door boys,” Geoff smirked as he pulled his ski mask down over his face. “Make it loud and obnoxious, we need their attention away from the back door for as long as possible.”

          “Ready Rimmy?” Michael grinned before pulling the bear mask down.

          “Ready Mogar,” Jeremy smirked with a tip of his obnoxious cowboy hat, his eyes totally obscured by highly reflective aviators.

          The two Lads quietly left the van while the rest of us waited for the signal. I adjusted my beanie, making sure my hair was tucked up into it and that the pins were going to hold it in place during the heist before I pushed my glasses up the bridge of my nose. Geoff had given me a pair of fake glasses with lenses like Ryan’s actual glasses, so I knew that any shot of my head was going to be totally obscured by a white sun burst when the footage was reviewed. I felt eyes on me and when I looked up to find them, I caught Ryan staring at me.

          “Yes Dear?” I teased with a raised eyebrow.

          “The rest of us go all out with the disguises, but you just look like yourself,” he shrugged nonchalantly.

          “I think you all have the ‘extra’ department covered. You don’t need my help,” I smirked.

          “That’s not a very ‘Fake’ way of thinking Love,” Gavin chuckled from behind his huge aviators. “Go big or go home!”

          “I’ll keep that in mind the next time I go out looking for disguises,” I rolled my eyes as I slipped my laptop back into my bag.

          Ryan elbowed my side and I elbowed back. Jack was about to scold us before we got into an elbow war when gunfire abruptly cut her off. That was our signal and we leapt into action.

          Gavin and Jack took point, checking around corners before waving me, Geoff, and Ryan on as we made our way to the back door of the bank. Gavin settled down to begin picking the lock, and I quickly ran up the wall and ripped the wiring that lead to the rear camera. I shook out my hand after landing to try and relieve the sting of shorting wires.

          “I thought you had cameras taken care of already?” Geoff huffed.

          “Interior cameras are on a different system than the exterior ones so that you can’t fuck with one outside and blind the inside,” I sighed as I adjusted my backpack. “And besides, is that not taken care of?”

          I motioned to the still sparking camera above us and smiled as a soft chorus of chuckles meet my ears. Geoff, Ryan and I covered the alley while Gavin worked and we could hear Michael and Jeremy still hooting and hollering as they drew as much attention to themselves as possible. There was a bird like squawk of joy and the back door quietly swung open. Now I took point as I led the way through the back hallways to the main vault.

          There were two in this bank: one near the front that the tellers could pull from throughout the day, and one larger one in the back that held _everything_ the bank had made this week. The armored trucks only came once a week to empty the vaults, and they were due tomorrow morning according to the schedule I had gotten ahold of. A whole weeks worth of cash was waiting for us at the end of the hallway I was about to turn around.

          Luckily the promise of a large haul wasn’t enough to distract me, and I was able to duck back around the corner before the guards could open fire on me and Jack.

          “They must have moved here when Short Temper started their distraction,” I grumbled after the hail of bullets stopped.

          “I got this,” Ryan grunted, and stepped past me.

          True to what he had told me a few months ago, Ryan fired his rifle while standing in the open hallway. The guards must have been stunned at Vagabond’s appearance because Ryan was able to get one shot in before the surviving man started to return fire. A few shots lodged into the wall behind Ryan before he fired another round and there was a solid thud as the other guard fell at the Vagabond’s hand. The loud crack of the rifle had forced me to squeeze my eyes shut, and when I opened them to look over Ryan I saw that one of the bullets had grazed his bicep. There didn’t appear to be blood coming from it, but there was definitely a sizable hole in the sleeve of his leather jacket.

          Before I could dwell on that for too long, he waved us forward and took up his place defending the hallway. Geoff and Jack started to drag the dead guards off to the side while I bashed the keypad with the butt of my pocket knife and plugged it into my laptop.

          “And now we wait,” I huffed as my program ran through all possible passcodes that could open the vault.

          “Boys,” Geoff said firmly as he adjusted his earpiece and his voice crackled in my ear. “We’re at the vault and working on getting in. How does it look out front?”

          “Pigs are just now showing up,” Michael reported and I could faintly hear sirens both in the distance and over the comms. “Most of the people either ran out or are hiding in the front vault. We could try to get in but we don’t have the advantage that you have.”

          “Cover?” Gavin asked. “Jeremy could cover you boy.”

          “No. Brie,” Michael snapped. “We don’t have her to crack the code. I could go on until next week and never get the code right.”

          “This is what happens when technology is allowed to take over,” I hummed as I watched wrong code after code flash across the screen. “We become complacent and allow it to be smarter than us.”

          “Says the computer science major,” Jack teased.

          “I’m using computers against each other,” I smiled up at her. “It’s like battle robots but with less fire and saw blades.”

          “So less fun?” Jeremy giggled.

          “We’ll see what’s more fun when this vault is open and we can literally roll in money,” I retorted.

          “We’re not looking at that big of a pay out,” Geoff said in a scolding tone meant to not let our hopes get too high.

          “There could be fifty dollars in pennies in there and I could still roll in it,” I said matter-of-factly as I checked to make sure that the cameras were still being scrambled.

          “I would cry if there was nothing but five thousand pennies in there,” Gavin snorted.

          “Me too Gav. Me too,” I smiled and glanced around to take in my surroundings.

          Ryan was still at the end of the hall, rifle trained down the hallway we had come from. The popping of Michael and Jeremy’s guns were muffled by the thick concrete walls, and it was eerily silent as I waited for my program to work.

          I could tell that the others were getting restless as another minute passed with no results.

          “How many potential results are there anyway?” Gavin asked as he nervously bounced on his heels.

          “Well,” I hummed as I thought. “It’s a six-digit code, and assuming that you could repeat a number as many times as you want, I’m going to guess a fuck ton.”

          “Would have gone with a shit load,” Michael quipped.

          “Either way, it’s too fucking many,” Ryan snapped, the irritation clear in his tone.

          “I understand that patience is a virtue that you don’t possess Dear,” I smirked as I looked down the hall at him. “But you already killed the two unwitting guards available to entertain you.”

          There was a chorus of snickers as Ryan glared at me from down the hall.

          “Shit!” Michael exclaimed suddenly and was followed by an explosion that rattled the building. “SWAT’s here with the big guns.”

          “Big explody guns,” Jeremy reiterated and was supported by another explosion.

          “I will never understand the LSPD,” I huffed and shook my head. “’They’re inside this perfectly good building. Let’s blow it up and kill them and every civilian inside.’”

          “They don’t get paid to think Babe,” Ryan grumbled. “Do you two need me up there? A little Vagabond could go a long way.”

          “Don’t look at me like that,” I snapped, not having to look up to see the wiggling eyebrows and teasing winks that Jack and Gavin were giving me.

          “You mean you’ve never tried anything with the mas-”

          “No,” Ryan and I said in unison, cutting Gavin off before he could finish his thought.

          “Ever consider i-”

          “No,” Ryan snapped again, but I remained silent as I glared down at my computer to hide my shame.

          “No,” Ryan said again but in disbelief and I could feel him eyeing me.

          “It’s crossed my mind,” I mumbled. “Nothing I took seriously though.”

          “Sweetpea you kinky fuck,” Jeremy teased.

          “Come on you useless sack of computer bullshit! Open the God damn door!” I shouted as I desperately tried to escape the conversation.

          “What was that about patience Sweetpea?” Ryan cooed.

          “Fuck all of you,” I huffed. “I’m going to take my share, buy a yacht and fuck right off forever.”

          An explosion rocked the building and this time it was strong enough to make all of us stumble and try to keep our footing.

          “Okay. I think we could use some of that Vagabond intimidation,” Michael hummed, sounding a little worried.

          Without another word, Ryan was off and his footsteps faded into the distance as there was a happy ding that came from my computer.

          “Fuck off!” I shouted as the vault began to unlock. “You couldn’t fucking open when I needed the distraction?!”

          “Table it Sweetpea,” Geoff said firmly. “We’ve got money to steal.”

          It took the four of us to haul the door all the way open and once we stepped inside, we all stopped to stare at the room in front of us.

          “We should have brought more bags” Jack said wistfully before shaking her head and throwing the empty duffel bags we were meant to fill.

          “That good huh?” Jeremy asked.

          “It’s more than five thousand pennies,” I smiled as I scooped stacks of hundred dollar bills into a bag before tossing it towards the door.

          “There’s probably a couple million in here,” Geoff giggled like a school girl. “Brie, have I ever told you how much I love you?”

          “Never without dollar signs in your eyes,” I teased and felt a stack of bills hit me in the back of my head. “Ow! Was that really necessary?”

          “Children, behave,” Jack chided.

          There was another explosion and I could hear the chilling sound of crumbling masonry. The four of us began working faster as the three in the front of the building began to fall back to our position.

          “Sweet mother of God,” Michael laughed as he ran into the vault and collected a few loaded bags.

          “We need to go,” Ryan grunted as he heaved three bags across his shoulders and took up a defensive stance at the door. “They’ve got the place surrounded and the front of the building is wide open. Any hope we had of leaving that way is gone, and Brie had to go and ‘take care of’ the rear camera so we can’t see if they’re covering the back door.”

          “There are other cameras,” I snapped as I shoved passed him so that I could retrieve my laptop from where I had left it on the floor outside the vault.

          “Any with a good view?” he asked condescendingly, looking over my shoulder as I pulled up the other feeds.

          “You keep talking like that and you’re uninvited from my permanent yacht vacation,” I huffed and glared at him over my shoulder.

          His gaze locked with mine and we held it for a moment, sparks of irritation and anger flying between us before he growled and looked away. This was nothing new to me. We had been on enough jobs that I had gotten used to the short fuse he had when he was working. For someone who enjoyed chaos, he was really impatient when things weren’t going as fast as he wanted. He pushed on the ear of his mask and I could hear the click as he turned his mic off before leaning in close to the side of my head that didn’t have my earpiece.

          “It’s getting very serious out there,” he whispered to me. “I want you out of here as soon as possible.”

          “I can handle myself,” I snapped quietly as I turned my mic off too.

          As I said that though, I moved the outside cameras and saw that not only was the back door compromised, but there was a veritable firing squad aiming right at the door, waiting for any movement that could possibly be us.

          “I have no doubt you can stay calm,” he hummed as he took in what was on the screen. “It’s every one of them that I’m worried about. They’re far more trained than you are and you’re only protection is on your torso. I happen to like all your parts where they are and not blown all over the walls outside.”

          I sighed heavily as a pang of fear started to form in the pit of my stomach. I had never been in a situation as bad as this and I was starting to feel the jitters of anxiety from losing control. Ryan must have sensed it because he pressed a hand to the small of my back. The coat he got me only helped so much, and now that I was tredding water in foreign territory, I needed him more than any other mission before.

          “We’ve gotten out of worse situations unscathed Sweetheart,” he murmured as he gently rubbed my back. “Just stick close to Geoff and Jack and you’ll be perfectly fine.”

          I nodded before turning my earpiece back on and the others voices filled my ear. There was something comforting about having them all there in my head and my anxiety stayed manageable even after Ryan removed his hand and stalked down the hallway to cover us.

          “What’s the situation look like lovebirds?” Geoff asked after hearing our mics turn back on.

          “Not good,” I huffed as I carried my computer over to where they were regrouping with all our duffels of money.

          “Yikes,” Michael hissed as he saw what was waiting for us in the back. “And the front is just as sketchy.”

          “We’ll need something to distract them,” I thought out loud as I put my laptop in my backpack in it’s new nest of cash. “Anything that can pull them from either opening long enough for us to get out.”

          “Vagabond,” Michael chuckled. “Now might be your opportunity to go claim that motorcycle you were eyeballing out front.”

          “It was a perfectly good bike that someone just laid down and took off without when I showed up,” Ryan explained as we joined him at the end of the hall. “I could take it and draw some of the heat away. It might not pull them all from the door, but it’s enough to make it manageable.”

          I could feel all eyes on me as he finished explaining his plan. I sighed because I knew why they were waiting for me to argue against it so that Ryan wouldn’t be in danger, and usually I _would_ argue. But I couldn’t think of any other options and that alone was starting to fry my brain. I nodded ruefully and pat Ryan’s shoulder.

          “I’ll see you back at the hideout?” I sighed.

          “The apartment,” Ryan corrected as he passed the others the bags he was carrying. “There’s too much cash to go through so we’d all just be sitting there with out thumbs up our ass all night.”

          “Okay,” I said quietly. “I’ll see you at home then.”

          He paused to look at all of us to make sure no one had any objections or anything else to say, gave me a small wink, and took off around the corner towards the front of the building.

          “I haven’t been able to increase the range of our comms,” I warned. “So you’re going to lose contact with us quickly, assuming you’re going to lead them in the opposite direction of our escape.”

          “Yes Dear,” he mocked, but I could tell that he was just trying to cheer me up.

          “That’s it. No yacht vacation for you.”

          “Damn it,” he hissed. “How else will I catch up on my reading?”

          “You could use audiobooks while you’re out on hits,” Gavin suggested

          “He’d lose track of the target. He gets lost in books easily,” I smiled.

          Ryan made a noise like he was going to say something, but then he decided against it and just chuckled.

          “What were you going to say?” I asked with narrowed eyes.

          “I’ll tell you later.”

          “I’ll hold you to that.”

          “I know you will,” I could hear his smile over the comms. “Okay, I’m in place. You all head to the back door and let me know when you’re ready for the distraction.”

          I was ushered into the middle of our line up, be it on purpose or not, but I felt safer with Geoff and Michael taking the lead while Gav, Jeremy, and Jack were behind me. I took a deep breath as we flanked the door we had come in through and I steeled myself away in preparation for the fight we were inevitably about to run into.

          “We’re ready,” Geoff said firmly.

          I tried not to look worried when there was a sudden burst of gunfire that wasn’t from Ryan’s rifle. Everyone else was tensely staring at the door while I focused on listening to what was going on out front. I sighed with relief when the unmistakable sound of a revving motorcycle cut through the gun fire.

          “Vagabond is out front causing a scene,” one of the officers outside stated.

          “He’s just trying to draw us away so that the others can escape. Stand your ground.”

          Geoff grumbled with irritation and was about to throw open the door so that we could at least get them to waste ammo when there was a loud explosion and my ear was full of Ryan’s childlike laughter.

          “Sticky bombs are the best,” he giggled and there was another loud boom accompanied by the sound of crunching metal.

          “Sir!” one of the men outside exclaimed. “They’re calling for back up.”

          “Fine!” their commander barked with irritation. “Squad One fall back to the front to help. Squad Two you stay here and deal with the others.”

          Once the sound of footsteps faded, Geoff counted off from five before throwing open the door. I shuddered as what sounded like four separate weapons unloaded through the opening. The others shrunk away from the door to avoid any ricochet and after a solid thirty seconds of deafening gun fire, it stopped. Jeremy and Michael leapt into the doorway and unloaded their own guns into the men in the alley. I didn’t feel any remorse as I heard four separate thuds as the cops’ bodies hit the asphalt. Maybe Ryan was beginning to rub off on me, but then I remembered that they wouldn’t think twice about doing the same thing to me. We weren’t all that different in the end. I just get paid more than they do. Once the coast was clear, we bolted to the van.

          “You didn’t even have to fire your gun Sweetpea,” Gavin chirped from behind me as we ran through the maze of passages.

          I was about to make a joke when suddenly I was grabbed and slammed against the side of a building. I didn’t take the time to see who had grabbed me, I reacted immediately by throwing my arms up and bashing my attackers head with the butt of my gun. When they stumbled back and I saw their police vest, I raised my gun and fired a few rounds into their head. They fell immediately and I wondered for a moment if they had even gotten a good look at me before I took them down.

          “Spoke too soon Gavvy,” Michael huffed as he pulled me back into our formation and we continued our escape.

          “You okay Sweets?” Ryan called out through the comms, and I smiled slightly at the concern in his voice.

          “I’m fine. Might bruise up, but nothing is bleeding.”

          “Good. I’m going to take off now. Be safe you guys.”

          “I love you too Vagabond,” Jeremy cooed.

          Ryan chuckled, but it was drowned out by the roar of his engine. His comms crackled and cut out as he sped away, taking some of the sirens with him. The six of us practically threw ourselves into the van and the engine had barely come to life before Jack was peeling away from the crime scene. Everyone was cheering and throwing around high-fives as we left the flashing lights of the LSPD in the dust, but my wide smile was only skin deep. I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was very wrong.

          Even after returning to the hideout and checking the bills for tracking devices and counterfeits, I still had the sinking feeling that there was something amiss. I told myself that I was just worried about Ryan, and on the way home I reminded myself of the hard drive of case files that I had hidden in the back of our closet in the safe with Ryan’s birth certificate and other official paperwork. He was an expert in the field of evading police, and just because I hadn’t heard from him didn’t mean that something was wrong. Even if it took all night, I was going to get a text from him when he was coming home.

          Unfortunately for me, my eyes were heavy with sleep and worry as the sun rose the next day. I checked my phone for the billionth time, just in case I had missed his message, and finally that worry became palpable and I felt nervous tears well up in my eyes. Edgar wandered into the living room and stopped to look at me with his own version of concern before ascending the stairs to look for Ryan so that he could cuddle before work.


	20. Finding Ryan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, life continues to kick my ass but I'm still truckin'. Now I'm on vacation and I actually have the time and energy to write. I will also be on the road Saturday so here is this week's chapter early! I will be back on my regular (or at least as close as I can get to regular) schedule next week!

          I sighed and picked at a knot in the wood while the others argued about what to do about Ryan. It had been three days and he was still ‘missing’. Whether or not he was missing is what we were arguing about. Each of us had gotten texts from him throughout the past seventy-two hours, but Jeremy and I felt like something was off about them.

          “I’m telling you Geoff, if he was _actually_ just laying low, Rye would have called one of us. Definitely Brie,” Jeremy said in exasperation.

          “We don’t know what kind of heat he may have picked up on the way out,” Geoff explained away with the shake of his head. “Maybe he’s somewhere where he can’t speak.”

          We had been in this spiraling argument for two days now. Jeremy and I felt that something was wrong, Gavin and Geoff thought that he was just in a tough spot, and Michael and Jack just sat back, unsure of what to think. I had fought just as hard as Jeremy, but three sleepless nights was starting to wear on me and my fighting spirit was fading. The constant ache in my chest made it hard to think clearly and I had been neglecting my work for the last few days because of my worrying. I knew that something was wrong. I should have told him to come up with a different plan, and maybe then he’d be at home with me where he belongs and not where ever the hell he was at the moment.

          “Brie,” Jack said softly as the circular conversation continued around us. “I know you miss him, but you just have to trust Geoff. He knows Ryan as well as you do and if-”

          “If he knows Ryan as well as I do, then he’d see that it’s not him texting us,” I said dryly and conversation stopped.

          I refused to look up from the table as I spoke, already tired of the argument that I had made several times now.

          “It not _him,”_ I sighed. “The texts are too perfect. They perfectly explain why he’s missing, they have perfect grammar and punctuation, and I haven’t gotten one shitty meme from him. If he has the ability to text us, Ryan would be doing more to contact us than ‘I need to lay low for a while. I attracted too much attention and need to hide.’”

          Jeremy gestured towards me in agreement but the other two continued to argue. I returned to the blemish on the table top and tried to fight off the ache in my chest. He had been gone in San Andreas for a whole week and it didn’t hurt nearly as much as this did, but at least I knew where he was then. I knew that he had to go ghost so that he wasn’t caught somewhere we couldn’t free him immediately. The texts made it worse for me, and only reminded me that he was gone and in trouble. My eyes fluttered as the conversation around me was so familiar that it was putting me to sleep. I laid my head down in my arms and let my eyes drift shut. Maybe my contacts will have gotten back to me by the time I woke up.

 

 

          I don’t know how long I was asleep, but it was long enough that my back ached from the awkward position and Michael and Gavin were out on the job they had for the day. I groaned along with the rest of my body as I stood up and stretched before stumbling out of the conference room.

          “Did your nap help you any?” Jack said sweetly from the kitchen, already holding out a cup of coffee for me.

          “I’m not sure yet,” I yawned, eagerly taking the drink from her hands. “I’ll feel better once my contacts get back to me.”

          “Back to you on what?” Jeremy asked excitedly, as if he knew what I had done.

          “I asked them to pull surveillance footage from the route Ryan took the other night,” I smirked. “I was able to get some of it on my own, but he took a turn down an alley that I couldn’t follow. Luckily, I’m on good terms with the people who _do_ have access to those cameras.”

          “I thought I told you to drop it Brie,” Geoff said sternly. “Ryan says-”

          “It’s not Ryan!” Jeremy and I spat in unison.

          “And it’s too late,” I huffed as I pulled out my phone to check my emails. “I already paid them. With my own money before you get your panties in a bunch. I’m not giving up on this until I know exactly where Ryan is. There is something very wrong with this whole situation and I’m not going to be able to relax until I can figure out what’s wrong and get Ryan home.”

          Geoff have me a hard look before settling back into the couch and the round of Peggle he was playing.

          “Geoff,” I said calmly and waited for him to look back at me. “I’m sorry I ignored your orders. He needs our help, _I can feel it,_ and I can’t just sit by and wait.”

          Geoff sighed and motioned for me to come over to him. I pushed off from the counter and leaned on the back of the couch beside him. He reached up, took a hold of the back of my head and pressed his forehead to mine. I felt him sigh and give me a gentle squeeze before speaking.

          “Like you said, it’s too late to stop you. And I’m getting kinda sick of sitting around too, but he’s done stuff like this before and in the past all we could do was wait for him to come limping home. You know as well as I do that he’s made of tough stuff, so I’m confident that he’s doing as well as he can be. He’ll be back here in no time. I hope your contact gets to you soon, so you can see where he went and relax.”

          “Thank you Geoff,” I muttered before pulling away from him and retreating to my office.

          I slumped down at my desk and nursed my coffee while I stared at my computers. Even with neglecting my duties, I wasn’t all that behind and only had a few leads to follow for a drug run. I also had an informant who was keeping an eye on some new, ballsy crews that were trying to pick fights with the Fakes to prove themselves. I smiled as I thought of where I was sitting, high atop the power ladder of Los Santos. Top dog flicking away puppies who were trying to appear tough. The scary senior that the freshmen were told to bother as a part of their hazing. Maybe it was the coffee, maybe it was the small power trip I just had, but I felt myself relax a little for the first time in days.

          So I finally dove into the work I’ve been putting off and tried to ignore the fact that I didn’t have someone to bring me tacos. As expected though, I quickly caught up on computer work. Usually, I would go out with Ryan or Michael and help shake down informants after finishing up, but with both of them gone I settled on playing Stardew Valley while I waited for the email I needed to find Ryan.

          I sighed as I walked past his house in game and I felt a little embarrassed that something so simple would make my heartache return in full force. Everyone gave him a hard time about going soft, but I was rarely reminded of how ‘soft’ I had gotten too. Ryan could put me into submission and in most cases I wouldn’t fight it. Before Ryan I would have never let someone get this close to me, I would have never let something as dumb as a house in a video game get to me, but Ryan was different.

          After losing my Dad and everything that happened with Tarot, I shut everyone out. I was determined to never let myself fall so far down that I needed to rely on anyone, because they would only hurt me in the end. Whether they meant to or not.

          I sighed as I listened to the three Fakes in the common room arguing over Peggle and a smile spread across my face. I could still feel Geoff’s comforting hand on the back of my head, and I remembered the way Jeremy has been on my side since the morning after the bank heist. After years of building my walls and becoming independent, here I was, with a family that loved me. I felt tears welling in the corners of my eyes as I longed for Ryan. I wanted him here, back home with us where he belonged. Where he was needed.

          My inbox pinged and my heart did flips as the email I’ve been waiting for all day finally graced my computer screen. I didn’t even read the subject line or the message attached, I just opened the files and retraced Ryan’s escape from the bank.

          I found the timestamp where he turned into the alley and used my new footage to follow Ryan as he pulled the bike into a dead end and out of sight from the road. Just after he was safely out of view, the police raced by and I fast forwarded about fifteen minutes while he waited to make sure that they wouldn’t come back around. He was about to leave on foot when he looked back towards the bike and gave in an indifferent shrug before returning to it and getting back on. I rolled my eyes and couldn’t stop my smile. I _was_ a nice bike and even if Ryan didn’t keep it, we could sell it for a decent price.

          He started to walk it down the alley when an unmarked white van pulled into the opening, blocking his escape. I felt my heart sink as my mind screamed. _I knew something happened!_ I watched in stunned horror as a group of people, dressed head to toe in plain black clothes, rushed Ryan. He was able to fight them off for a few minutes, but he was outnumbered and in close quarters so his attackers eventually got the upper hand. One person got behind him, and with a swing of their bat, Ryan was knocked unconscious and unceremoniously thrown into the van.

          I was shaking with fear as I watched the same scene but from a different camera angle, hoping to get a look at the license plate on the van. I was trembling so bad that it took a few tries to pause the video on a frame with a clear enough shot to read. I needed to run that plate and see who owned it. Once I got that information, I could go to Geoff and we could start forming a plan.

          I held my head in my hands as I ran the plate through the copy of the LSPD database I had and tried to calm myself down.

_He was okay. Ryan is made of tough stuff, just like Geoff said. He was going to be okay. He’s been tortured before, he told me that’s how he learned most of his techniques. If anyone can stay calm during something like that, it’s Ryan._

          But no matter how many times I told myself that, I couldn’t stop shaking. I knew he had been in trouble from the start and I was kicking myself for not working faster to rescue him. Now, I could only hope that nothing irreparable had happened to him.

          My heart skipped when the plate came through with a match, but it stopped when I saw who owned it. My blood ran cold as fear fully took over my body for a moment, but like gas fumes being ignited, rage flowed through me like fire in my veins. My teeth clenched to keep from screaming, I ripped the flash drive with the footage out of my computer and scooped up my laptop before storming back to the conference room.

          “Conference room! Now!” I snapped at the people on the couch, not even glancing in their direction.

          Only once I had set my things down and everyone filed in behind me did I realize that Gavin and Michael were back from their job.

          “What’s going on Brie?” Geoff asked firmly, seeing my rage and trying to keep a level head against me.

          I opened my mouth to tell him, but the words burned away in my throat and all I could get out was an angry growl. I plugged my flash drive into the computer attached to the TV in the room and let the footage tell them for me. It was deathly silent as everyone watched with the same horror I had while I fought to get into their computer system. I need to get a hold of them, and to make them give Ryan back. I followed a back door route that I had found in one of the addresses I had attached to the emails they used to contact me and easily slipped into their computer system.

          “Who owns that van?” Geoff barked, his own anger making his eyes dark.

          Another growl rumbled through my throat as I connected to an unprotected internet connection and called the copy of Skype that computer had. The webcam on my laptop showed my tired and enraged face on the screen in the room, but the others were out of frame so they didn’t panic when the call tone filled the room. He was already wearing a smug smile when he answered the call and I didn’t give him time to voice the cocky greeting I could see forming behind his eyes.

          “Where the FUCK is he Coins?” I roared, my anger finally coming out in words.

          His low laugh filled the room and the rest of the Fakes tensed up as we waited for his response.

          “Took you long enough Sweetpea,” he sneered. “I thought you had total control over the cameras of Los Santos.”

 _“Where. Is. He?”_ I snarled, ignoring the mocking tone he was using on me.

          His smile turned sickly as he looked off to the side and my trembling was obvious on camera, but so was my anger so I didn’t make any attempts to stop it.

          “Look at how worked up she is,” Coins cooed to someone off camera. “She looks so tired. She must have been up the entire time you’ve been gone, look at how far the great and powerful _Sweetpea_ has fallen. Getting weak and bleary eyed over a nice piece of ass.”

          I ignored his jabs and focused on the part of his snide remarks that gave me hope.

          “Let me see him Coins,” I hissed.

          He gave me a look that told me that maybe I shouldn’t have made that request but I stood firm, glaring into the webcam as I hunched over the table with my knuckles turning white as I held the edge of the table to keep myself from punching something. Coins shrugged and turned the camera with a knowing smirk.

          I fought to stay standing as the sight of Ryan’s predicament knocked me off balance. My breathing became even more shaky as Ryan, tied to a chair and beaten bloody and unmasked, sat up from his hunched over position. One eye was swollen shut, but the other look back at me through the camera with a mix of relief and weary confidence.

          “Fuck have I missed you Sweets,” he croaked with the best smile he could muster.

          I could see his body shake with every breath and his smile only lasted a moment before it became too much for him to maintain. I wanted to cry at the sight of him.

          “What have they done to you?” I muttered, not meaning for it to be out loud.

          Coins’ low laugh filled the room, but it sounded sick and twisted, like I had just walked right into a trap he knew I would fall for. The color drained from my face as the painfully familiar sound of an aluminum baseball bat hitting concrete accompanied Coins as he walked over to Ryan. Again, I felt like I was going to fall over as Coins drug the bat behind him and grabbed a fistful of Ryan’s hair. Ryan hissed quietly as Coins yanked his head back so that he was sitting up straight and facing forward.

          “I told you I’d find a way to make you suffer like I did,” Coins smiled. “Granted, I didn’t watch you beat Swords, but this will work.”

          Coins let go of Ryan and swung back to his fullest and came down hard across Ryan’s knees. It wasn’t full strength, but Ryan’s painful groan cut the last remaining thread of sanity left in me. Fear and desperation wiped my anger away and the scream ripped through my body before I could stop it.

          “Stop!” I cried as I finally fell into my chair.

          Everyone’s eyes were on me as I broke down into tears. The Fakes in the room with me looked on with pained sympathy, Ryan looked like he was on the verge of tears as he watched my cry, and Coins looked like he had just won the lottery.

          “I told you we could settle this without involving them,” I sobbed despite my best efforts to come across as strong. “They didn’t do anything to deserve being a part of this. This is my sin to resolve, not theirs. Name your price Coins. Just let Vagabond go and leave the Fakes alone.”

          “But you’re a Fake now Sweetpea,” Coins mocked me.

          I looked around the room at the dysfunctional family I had grown to love and my already fractured heart broke as I saw the pain in their eyes. I had done this to them. I had let Coins go for too long and now he was hurting the people I loved. This was why I worked alone. Because then the only person getting hurt was me. Geoff shook his head as he read my face but it was too late, and the numbness took over. I needed to get Ryan safe. I could figure out everything else afterwards.

          “Then I’ll leave,” I croaked around the knot in my throat that tried to stop me.

          “What was that?” Coins said with a wide, victorious grin. “I don’t think I heard that correctly. Did you just say you’d leave the Fake AH Crew _just so you could save Vagabond?”_

          “Yes,” I said coolly, the numbness finally spreading to my voice and it became flat and uncaring. Even the hurt look Ryan was giving me didn’t register in my mind.

          “Fine then,” Coins shrugged indifferently, but I could tell he was ecstatic. “You come to the location I send you, without the Fakes, and I’ll set your boyfriend free and we can end this.”

          “Deal,” I nodded.

          “This is almost as good as I had hoped,” Coins grinned. “Seeing you so defeated and weak. Here I was, thinking that Sweetpea would have put up more of a fight, but I guess your bark always was worse than your bite.”

          “Just send me a time and place Coins,” I ordered. “And when I get there, Vagabond better have his mask on and not have any new injuries.”

          “Why the mask?” Coins teased. “You like it?”

          “If I’m coming in Fake-less, he’s going to have to walk home or drive my car.”

          “Fair enough. I look forward to seeing you Sweetpea.”

          I didn’t give him the benefit of a response and just mashed the escape key to end the call. Immediately the conference room erupted with shouts.

          “You can’t actually be fucking serious!” Jeremy exclaimed.

          “You’re not going in there alone Brie,” Geoff snapped.

          I held up a hand to silence them as my mind cleared now that I knew Ryan was safer and coming home.

          “I’m not going in alone. I have a plan,” I said, still numb. “But I was serious about leaving. If I come out of this alive, I won’t be coming back. You all are just a target as long as I’m here and… and I can’t have that.”

          “Fuck off,” Michael huffed. “You’re not leaving the Fakes. This is a ‘one way in, no way out’ type of agreement because Ryan would rather die than have you leave.”

          “When this started seven months ago, I might have let you leave and be glad to have you and your baggage gone,” Geoff sighed as he rubbed his cheeks. “But you’re a member of the family now. Your problems are ours now and honestly, I get the feeling that Coins would find a way to be a huge pain in our asses even after you leave.”

          I took a deep breath and the shaking came back in full force and it shook tears loose from my eyes. It had been so long since I had a family that was willing to fight for me. Since Dad died, Meg was the only person to truly give a shit about me but she wasn’t a fighter. Not like this anyway. The pained look Ryan gave me flashed before my eyes and I felt it’s effects. If I left and lived through my interaction with Coins, it would be damn near impossible to see him. I would have to move out just so that he could be out of immediate danger and he couldn’t go out on a simple date or his identity might be blown. I would lose everything that I loved. I looked up at them and felt a small smile pull at my cheeks. They all looked ready to go to war for me. For Ryan.

          I wiped away my tears and fumbled with my phone as a plan was starting to finalize in my mind.

          “Then we need to end this. Coins needs to go, and if he wants to feel my bite, I’ll fucking show him how hard I can bite.”

          A worried glance was thrown around the room as the phone rang and my confidence started to return.

          “Sweetpea,” a smooth, sultry voice cooed into the phone. “Don’t roll your eyes, you know you love me.”

          “Osiris,” I sighed. “I need to use that favor you owe me.”

          “Oh Sweetpea,” he laughed, a manic almost hysterical laugh that the other Fakes recognized and their eyed widened at the sound.

          “That is music to my ears. What do you need from me, my beautiful Iris blossom?”


	21. Favors

          I looked up at the warehouse and I felt the knot of anxiety in my stomach twist tighter. I pulled the collar of my coat up closer to my face and took a deep breath as the swiftly moving shadows that flitted around the building brought me some comfort. A few breaths later and I was ready to go. Everything was in place, I just needed to bide my time with Coins.

          The door creaked loudly as I stepped inside and it closed heavily behind me. Hushed voices silenced as my heavy boots thumped against the bare floor and I made my way through the stacks of crates. I clenched my fists in my pockets as I braced myself for whatever I saw when I found my way to where they were waiting for me. While I didn’t trust Coins to not hurt Ryan further, I did expect him to not _seriously_ hurt him. Even so, I didn’t want to lay eyes on him and immediately throw myself at Ryan. I felt anticipation break through my anxiety as I thought of Ryan, even hurt, waiting for me just a handful of yards away.

          Coins made me wait another couple days and Ryan had been gone for a week now. I was itching to have him in bed beside me again and my heart skipped. The thought and my coat made my imagination run wild with images of soft kisses and a good night’s sleep.

          I swallowed hard before rounding the last stack and stepping, alone, into the well lit area in the back of the warehouse.

          “Right on time,” Coins grinned as I took a few steps towards him.

          I scanned the room and felt an odd mix of emotions. There were more people here than I thought were in the Lancers. There were the six members I knew of, but there seemed to be three or four others here and I couldn’t tell if they were a part of the crew or hired muscle for just in case I went back on my word. While they would only complicate things slightly, the irritation of their presence was nothing compared to the relief that I felt when I saw Ryan standing. Though he was tied to a pillar, he appeared to be standing on his own two legs and only favored one of his legs slightly. His mask was on and though I could see both his eyes now, one was still a little swollen. His chest heaved at he let out a breath and relaxed slightly before looking around to see if he could see the glint of Jeremy or Michael’s scopes, but he stiffened again as he didn’t find them.

          “Hmm,” Coins huffed and looked around. “I expected you to go back on your word, but nothing has exploded yet so I know that the Fakes aren’t nearby.”

          “I told you that they wouldn’t be here,” I said, using the deadpan delivery that I had been practicing. I wanted him to think I was numb and resigned.

          “You did,” Coins nodded. “You know how this is going to work right?”

          “No, but if I had to guess, you plan on killing me.”

          “Clever girl,” the man cooed and I saw Ryan start to fight his restraints out of the corner of my eye.

          “I don’t like how quiet Vagabond is,” I pointed out. “He’s not usually this quiet.”

          Coins snapped his fingers and one of the new men stepped over to Ryan, lifted his mask just enough to show the duct tape that was over his mouth, and roughly ripped it off.

          “You didn’t!” Ryan exclaimed as his mask was replaced. “Please tell me you didn’t come alone.”

          “The agreement was that the Fakes stayed home,” I reiterated, not looking over at him because if I did I would lose my composure.

          His low growl filled the warehouse and a few of the Lancers looked like they wanted to be anywhere but this close to an injured and angry Vagabond. Coins on the other hand looked like a content cat.

          “And you kept your word,” the larger man grinned and he looked me over. “That’s a cute jacket. _He_ get it for you?”

          “Yes,” I said bluntly.

          “Oooo,” Coins giggled. “I’ve broken her. Look at it boys. The almighty Sweetpea, Los Santos’ largest bank of information, broken over a man. How the mighty fall.”

          “Says the man who’s involving his entire crew in a useless grudge that should have ended months ago,” I smirked with a tilt of my head.

          That irked Coins and his cocky smile wavered. His fingers twitched as he took a step forward.

          “You’re all talk,” he growled. “I think it’s time someone knocked you down a few pegs Sweetpea. You’re not the powerful woman you portray yourself to be. It’s all an act that you put on so that people won’t question you. Well that ends here tonight.”

          I gasped as he lunged at me and I barely had time to dodge him, quickly sidestepping him and stumbling as his surprise attack threw me off. Before I could regain my bearings, a solid punch landed on my cheek and the world flashed white as I staggered back. Doubled over, I glared up at Coins, who was stalking towards me his hands reaching out for a baseball bat that was leaning against the table.

          “Let Vagabond go. Then we can fight all you want,” I ordered, my voice clear and firm despite the swelling in my cheek.

          “No,” Coins said flatly as his fingers wrapped around the grip. “He gets to watch his Sweetpea die. Or at the very least he gets to see the aftermath. Then we will have come full circle and we can be done.”

          “Except I don’t play under your rules!” Ryan roared and thrashed against his bindings. The pain in his voice was enough to make my heart ache. “You kill her and I will make sure each and every one of you dies by the end of the month!”

          “So faithful,” Coins smirked.

          “It’s more than Swords ever gave either of us.”

          The crack of his bat against my side echoed through the warehouse and my painful cry was most likely heard blocks away. I fell to my knees clutching what was probably a broken rib and swayed as I struggled to stay conscious despite my body’s attempts to go into shock. It was time to start my plan, but I wasn’t sure if I could do it in this state. My quiet, pained sobs were close, but I needed it to be louder. Like he had taught me.

          The first few giggles were a struggle but once they started, my anxiety took over and they grew louder until I was laughing hysterically through the pain in my side. Coins looked at me with a mixture of confusion and humor as I appeared to finally break, but then I started to pitch the laughter up. I made the sound waver and finally I was able to copy their laughter.

          The warehouse erupted with similar sounds, and everyone around me looked into the darkness with eyes dilated in horror as it sounded like a pack of hyenas was swarming the building. I stopped laughing and let my head hang low as I tried to power through the pain in my side. Around me the laughter grew more malicious as the Lancers were quickly overpowered by the gang of intruders. A few gun shots rang out, but there wasn’t the recognizable sound of a body falling so no one was lethally hit.

          A warm pair of hand gently grabbed my shoulders and helped me up. With one hand still holding my side, I took a few moments to lean against Osiris as I tested my injury. I looked up at him, his amber eyes glowing with excitement and a little bit of playfulness as he held me up. His tanned skin was flawless and auburn hair fell around his face like he tried to comb it to one side but it desperately wanted to be on the other.

          “Thought you were going to let yourself get roughed up,” Osiris sighed dramatically as he held me firmly by my shoulders. “I hate to see such a beautiful women get hurt like that.”

          “Flattery is going to get you nowhere Osiris,” I smirked as I watched Coins grow even more enraged by the second.

          “I can still try,” The man shrugged with a sly wink. “But the Hyenas are yours tonight my sweet Iris and after his display, I’m not going to step in between you and your prey.”

          “You don’t have to suck up so hard Osiris,” I rolled my eyes. “We’re even after this, but don’t get any ideas. I don’t want you coming after me and mine just because you think you’re free of me.”

          “After tonight, I wouldn’t dare cross you my Dear,” he grinned, but it was just a little too malicious to be teasing.

          “You said you’d come alone!” Coins finally spoke up, his voice shaking with anger.

          “I said I’d come without the Fakes,” I smirked as I stepped away from Osiris slowly, testing to see how badly walking hurt.

          My breath hitched as a sharp pain shot through me but it was nothing I couldn’t deal with as long as I moved carefully.

          “You lying whore!” he bellowed.

          I snapped my fingers and pointed towards one of the Lancers. There was a loud bang as the Hyena holding them shot them in the back of the head and let their body fall. Coins stopped shaking and I continued to walk towards where he was being kept on his knees by two Hyenas.

          “I’m done playing your game Coins,” I said darkly as I stood over him. “You wanted me to do more than bark, well, here’s my bite.”

          I snapped twice and two more Lancers fell to the floor. I looked over to Ryan who was staring straight at me, body frozen in place and eyes wide with shock. I nodded towards him and a few Hyenas quickly set to work freeing him. When I looked back at Coins, he had gone stone-faced and was only glaring at me.

          “What?” I asked dryly. “Don’t like watching your crew get hurt?”

          “No,” Coins said, almost bored before I could snap my fingers again. “They’re just bodies. I can find more.”

          This clearly didn’t go over well with the remaining Lancers and their eyes ignited with betrayal and hatred.

          “Something told me you’d say that,” I smirked and let my hand drop to my side.

          “I’m going to give you all a choice,” I said, addressing the Lancers. “You can leave here and never look back, never talk about what happened here, and you can go on living your lives. Or you can stay here, remain loyal to Coins, and suffer the same fate as him. Say ‘I’ if you’d like to leave.”

          To no one’s surprise, all the remaining Lancers quickly sang a chorus of ‘I’s and I motioned for them to be let go. They all but ran out of the building and left their former boss kneeling in a warehouse surrounded by guns. Once Ryan was standing beside me, holding the discarded weapon of one of the fallen Lancers, I turned my head to Osiris.

          “You and yours are free to go now,” I smiled. “I’ve got it from here.”

          “It was a pleasure Sweetpea,” Osiris smiled back and took my free hand so that he could kiss my knuckles.

          “What did I say about flattery?” I warned and Ryan growled quietly beside me.

          “That it will get me nowhere,” Osiris grinned as his men started to leave. “And like I said before: I can still try.”

          With a low bow, he and the last few Hyenas ducked out in silence, leaving me and Ryan alone with Coins.

          “What are you going to do to me now?” Coins grumbled. “Kill me and leave me to rot like Swords?”

          “No. I’m not done with you,” I smiled and Ryan watched me curiously as he kept his gun trained on our prisoner. “But first things first. Are you okay Ryan? Or are you putting on a tough face?”

          Ryan stared at me like I had grown three heads and quickly glanced at Coins before answering.

          “I’m pretty sure I’ve got a few broken fingers and a fractured tibia, but other than that and a lot of bruises I’m okay.”

          “Good,” I muttered and pressed a kiss to his shoulder.

          I heard him sigh at my touch and I couldn’t help but smile.

          “What’s next for him?” Ryan asked waving the barrel of his gun at Coins. “Do I finally get to kill him?”

          “No, I’ve still got things planned for him,” I sighed as I checked my phone and the notifications on them made my smile grow.

          “Check your phone Coins.”

          He looked a little astonished at my order, but because he didn’t have much else to do, he slowly pulled his phone from his pocket. I eagerly waited as he opened the notifications I _knew_ were waiting for him and a satisfying wave of pleasure washed over me as his face dropped a few shades.

          “What have you done?” he hissed but didn’t move as Ryan tightened his grip on his gun.

          “I had all your money transferred to my accounts,” I shrugged. “And if you keep reading through your notifications, all your properties belong to me too. I now own everything you have. You have no crew. No money. No where to go. No where to hide. Sound familiar?”

          He didn’t say a word, but he was shaking and the look in his eyes told me that it wasn’t from anger. He was trembling in fear.

          “I’m not going to walk out of here am I?” he whispered.

          “Of course not,” I said. “After everything you’ve done to me, why on Earth would I let you live?”

          He didn’t respond and I held up a hand as Ryan started to take aim.

          “I’m not done. Coins wanted to see the full might of Sweetpea, and he hasn’t seen how far I can reach yet.”

          I pulled out a walkie talkie and both men watched as I smiled and pushed the button.

          “Lawrence, Elyse, Bruce. Your targets are ready for your deliveries.”

          “You got it Sweetpea!” Elyse sang back, the roar of jet engines filling the otherwise quite warehouse.

          “Not only did I transfer ownership of all your buildings to accounts that I control, but I used a favor and my name is now on all those multi-million dollar insurance policies you have on each of them.”

          The ground shook as explosions sounded from various parts of the city, and the screech of jets over head faded in and out over our heads.

          “I have someone at the insurance company who owes me quite a few favors, so there won’t be an investigation. I’ll just get the money once the paperwork is finished.”

          Coins looked defeated as more explosions rocked the city and emergency vehicles scattered all over town as they tried to be in several places at once. There wasn’t any satisfaction in the look he was giving me. I pulled my pistol out of my coat and lifted Coins chin with the barrel. He looked up at me with numb eyes.

          “And the best part is that I don’t care that the look on your face isn’t satisfying,” I smiled down at him. “All this isn’t so that I can crush you. This isn’t about revenge. It’s so that I can put a fucking end to this, like I should have years ago, but was too scared to do myself. It’s so that I can finally sleep at night and not be afraid that you’re going to show up and ruin everything I’ve worked for. And it’s to show everyone else what happens when you fuck with the Fakes.”

          With that, I pulled the trigger and a weight fell from my shoulders as Coins’ body slumped to the floor. A cool wave of relief washed over me as I came to terms with it.

_It was over. He was dead. The Lancers are pacified and broken apart so I could handle them if they acted out. I was free._

          Tears fell down my cheeks as my head fell back and my arms went limp at my sides. There was the loud clatter of a gun hitting concrete and before I could open my eyes, Ryan’s arms were wrapping around my waist. I was surprised to feel his lips on mine, but I melted into him as he held me close and only pulled away enough to breathe. I whimpered into his lips as all my fear and worry came out, and my kisses became desperate. I was starved of him and I needed more.

          But we needed to see a doctor for our broken bones, and we had an entire crew worrying about us at the hideout, so I pulled away reluctantly and paused long enough to get a good look at Ryan’s beautiful blue eyes. He pressed a kiss to my forehead and nodded towards the door.

          “We can continue this after we get patched up,” he said quietly. “I’m assuming you have Kerry waiting for us at the hideout?”

          “And the rest of the crew,” I nodded before speaking into my walkie again.

          “Kovic, your target will be ready in ten minutes.”

          “Roger that. Is Vagabond okay?”

          “As okay as he can be,” I sighed as I leaned into Ryan.

          “I bet Geoff’s been a wreck,” Ryan chuckled as wrapped and arm around my shoulder to better support me as we left.

          “I’ve been the wreck,” I smiled. “Geoff was surprisingly calm until we, _I,_ figured out where you had gone. He kept telling us that you’d done this before and not to worry.”

          “I would have called at least once.”

          “That’s what Jeremy and I said!”

          The argument continued once we were back with the crew in the infirmary, and Geoff conceded defeat now that Ryan was there to support us. After the initial round of concern everything fell back into normalcy while Kerry and Caleb set Ryan’s hand and put my dislocated rib back into place. They were filling Ryan in on what he had missed and I wanted to join in on their laughter, but I was so tired and the way he ran his fingers through my hair while I was laid out on the table next to him. My head was in his lap and soon I was in a still, dreamless sleep.

 

 

          “Sweetheart,” Ryan’s voice called out through the darkness. “Baby, let’s go home.”

          I inhaled deeply and smiled as my eyes fluttered open. The first thing I saw was Ryan’s eyes, unmarred by swelling now that the cut on his forehead that was held shut by a butterfly bandage. His sweet but still tired smile made my heart beat faster and I couldn’t stop myself from reaching out to cup his cheek to make sure this was real. He kissed my palm before leaning into my touch with his own blissfully content sigh.

          My eyes fluttered shut again as his warmth flooded through my hand and spread out across my body. I could hear his low chuckle and Jack’s voice in my mind, but I couldn’t make my eyes open to see them or focus on their words. Tidbits of idle conversation and the gentle rumble of a car broke through my heavy mind as I was taken home. The feeling of Ryan’s hand in mine was the only constant, his fingers gently rubbing mine and making it harder to stay awake. He should have been the exhausted one, but no amount of effort was enough to force my eyes open.

          It wasn’t until I felt our mattress that it became possible to open my eyes. Ryan smirked as he lifted his shirt over his head and I tried to ignore the black and purple splotches that covered him.

          “Of course you wake up once I’ve carried you to bed,” he teased.

          “You didn’t carry me did you?” I gasped. “You really shouldn’t with your leg-”

          I was cut off by a kiss.

          “I didn’t carry you,” he reassured me with a gentle nuzzle. “You’ve been basically sleep walking since we left the hideout.”

          “Come to bed,” I whined as he pulled away. “How are you not exhausted?”

          “I am Baby,” he huffed with soft laughter. “But I want to take a shower first. I’ll be right in the bathroom if you need me. I promise.”

          I sleepily crawled out of my clothes before burrowing under the covers and settling into my pillow. The empty bed no longer made my chest hurt and the running water in the other room sounded like music to my very tired ears.

          He was home. I had him back and he was safe. My fingers curled around the sheets as I started to cry softly into my pillow. The stress of the week and all my anxiety came out at once, but my body was too tired to go into a full breakdown. It was quiet enough that Ryan had gotten into bed behind me before he realized what was happening. I felt him sigh sadly as his arms, extra warm from his shower, wrapped around me and his good leg wrapped around mine.

          “I’m right here Brie,” he whispered and I thought I could hear him sob softly. “I’m safe. We’re home. I’m right here with you and I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

          “I love you Ryan,” I whispered, my voice hoarse with sleep and tears.

          “I love you too Brie,” he whispered back and pressed a kiss to the shell of my ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And then there was one. One more chapter, and then it's finished. This has been a wild ride folks. I'll see you next week with some information on my ideas for my next big fics.


	22. A Much Needed Vacation

          “Are you shitting on my dick right now Brie?” Geoff gasped while everyone else stared out into the ocean.

          “That is not a mirage Geoffrey,” I smirked as excited giggles erupted from the Lads.

          “You bought us a freakin’ yacht?!” Gavin squawked as he and Michael dove into the boat waiting for us on the docks.

          “I bought us a fucking yacht,” I smiled back as Ryan carefully climbed in after them, still babying his leg even though Kerry said it was good to go.

          “Have you been working on the side?” Jack winked as she started the motorboat’s engine.

          “All the paperwork for Coins’ insurance policies finally went through and I got the payout,” I explained as we all settled in for the trip out to the _S.S. Savage._ “On top of that, Coins didn’t blow all his earnings like everyone else and when I finally got all the money in one account I was amazed that it could show that many zeros.”

          “Are you a billionaire now?” Jeremy grinned. “Does Ryan have a Sugar Mama?”

          “I’m not a billionaire,” I said with and eye roll. “But after liquidating Coins, I had close to fifty million. So, I figured what better way to spend it than on a fifteen-million-dollar boat?”

          “I notice you’re ignoring the Sugar Mama thing though,” Jeremy pressed on.

          “Because Ryan and I hardly buy anything other than food and video games,” I sneered playfully.

          “I’m fine with you buying my Steam wishlist for me,” Ryan shrugged with a wink.

          “I’ll think about it,” I muttered as tried to ignore the eyebrows Jeremy was giving me.

          Once we were at the ship and climbing aboard, I smiled as the others stopped and stared at the bags that were waiting for them.

          “Why are my things here?” Michael asked cautiously.

          “Because we’re on vacation numb nuts!”

          Heads snapped up as Lindsay and Meg looked down at us from the top deck and waved. They were already in their swimsuits and I smirked as Geoff looked lost.

          “Vacation?” he murmured.

          “Yes Geoff. Vacation,” I said as I grabbed my bag. “After all the shit I put you through, I felt like it was well deserved so I cleared everyone’s schedule for the next week and we can spend it doing whatever we want.”

          The Lads were already scooping up their things and taking off towards the cabins. I wasn’t worried about them taking the good rooms, partially because they _all_ were good rooms, but also because I had Lindsay label them all so there wouldn’t be any arguments.

          And so Ryan and I had the Captain’s suite.

          Jack gently bumped Geoff on her way past him and that seemed to snap him out of it. He looked over to me and gave me a bear hug. I heard Ryan start to protest because of my rib, but it hadn’t bothered me for a couple weeks now and I couldn’t help but giggle as Geoff trotted off after Jack already looking more relaxed than I had ever seen him.

          “This was really sweet of you,” Ryan said quietly as he took my hand and followed me to our room.

          “Like I said, I felt like I owed everyone for my totally shitty first year with the Fakes.”

          He laughed as I led him past the deck where the others were staying and up one more level to our suite.

          “I wouldn’t call it totally shitty,” he hummed as he closed the door behind us.

          “I brought all my baggage in unannounced, dumped it on all of you, got you kidnapped and tortured-”

          “It was hardly torture,” Ryan huffed as he sat on the edge of the bed. “I’ve dealt with worse for longer.”

          “That doesn’t make it okay Ryan,” I sighed as the guilt made my chest hurt. “It shouldn’t have happened and it definitely made for a shitty first year.”

          Ryan’s hands wrapped around my hips and he pulled me towards him. I raised my eyebrows as he positioned me to straddle his hips and a sweet smile spread across his face.

          “Sure, it wasn’t great, but think off all the good things that have happened since you joined,” he whispered as his hands began to wander. “You’ve made three times as much money as you used to, you’ve gotten over your fear of guns, you’ve moved into a much larger and nicer apartment.”

          “You’ve gained a family that loves you. You’ve been able to close a horrible part of your past for good. You’ve fallen madly in love with the most dangerous man in Los Santos, and he’s fallen head over heels for you.”

          He started punctuating each point with a kiss as he slowly made his way along my neck and jaw, ending with a lingering kiss at the junction of the two. I shivered when his tongue gently pulled my earlobe between his lips and a whine escaped me at the sensation of his teeth grazing the curve of my ear.

          “It sucked at the time, but I’d say it was all worth it in the long run,” he whispered.

          “Ryan,” I whimpered as his mouth wandered back down my neck and his hands slipped under my shirt.

          “Being with you has made it all worth it,” he continued as he pulled my shirt off. “I’d even be willing to say that this has been the best year of my life.”

          “I can’t believe it’s only been a year,” I shuddered as his hands splayed out across my bare back and his lips traveled across my collarbone. I laid one hand on his shoulder for balance and my other tangled itself into his hair.

          “Technically, it’s been a year and three months,” he smirked against my skin.

          “You’ve been keeping track?” I teased.

          I moaned loudly as he suddenly brought his hands forward and freed my breasts from my bra, kneading them gently as he grinned wolfishly.

          “Yes, I have,” he said, his voice thick with desire. “You have something you want to say about it?”

          “You’ve gone soft Vagabond,” I hissed and bit my lip as he gripped me even tighter at my words. “It was bad enough when you slow danced with me in front of the entire world and brought me tacos for lunch, but keeping track of our relationship like a high schooler? That-”

          I was cut off by Ryan’s mouth crashing into mine. His teeth sank into my lower lip and I groaned as he bucked his hips and forced me to sit flush against his hips. His nails sent waves of pleasure through me as his ran them down my back and none too gently grabbed my ass and forced me to grind against him. His teeth grazed my throat and I could tell by the way he was tensing that he was about to show me just how ‘soft’ he had gotten.

          “Hey!” Lindsay shouted through the door, making both of us jump. “You’ve got all week to fuck! Come outside a socialize for a while before you two disappear in each other!”

          Ryan growled into my neck, but he relented and let me slide out of his lap. I couldn’t help but smile as he looked disappointed that I wasn’t at his mercy anymore, but a smile crept onto his face as I pulled my bikini out of my bag. I turned my back to him and intentionally made a show of getting undressed. I heard him rumble with pleasure as I slowly bent over to step out of my panties and I looked over my shoulder to wink at him.

          “Fuck it. They can wait,” he growled and grabbed my hip.

          I giggled as he threw me onto the bed. My head fell back into the comforter as he dropped to his knees in front of me. I let out a slow, longing moan as his breath tickled my thighs and his hands snaked up my sides.

 

 

          I sank into the hot tub to quickly hide my flushed skin, but judging by the look on everyone’s faces, they had seen the residual redness and knew its source.

          “Get unpacked?” Geoff asked from the raft he was floating in the pool on. I couldn’t see his eyes through his dark sunglasses, but the small smirk was enough for me.

          “Geoff, I barely got undressed,” I shot back as I relaxed against the massage jets.

          “That’s a bold-faced lie,” Ryan scoffed as he walked by, handing me a Dr. Pepper on his way to the pool. “You were totally undressed and that was the problem.”

          “That’s a problem?” Michael giggled.

          “It is when I’m on the other side of the room,” Ryan winked before sitting down and dipping his feet in the water.

          “You didn’t sound like you were on the other side of the room when I walked by and told you _not_ to fuck,” Lindsay teased.

          “That was before she got undressed,” Ryan shrugged.

          Conversations wandered from there and I was content to sit and listen to them as I settled back into the hot tub and closed my eyes letting it all come together around me.

          The were my family now. It had taken seven long years, but I finally had a real family again. One that loved me unconditionally and was comfortable enough to joke and tease without worrying about bruising someone’s ego. I loved all of them and as hysterical laughter rose from the pool, I knew that I was home as long as they were there.

          Someone got into the water next to me and when I peeked out from under my eyelids the smile I didn’t know I was wearing only grew.

          “It’s been a long time since we got some one-on-one hang out time,” Meg giggled as she settled in beside me. “I hope it’s okay that I brought a friend.”

          “Hello! I am friend,” Lindsay chirped and flopped into the water on my other side.

          “The more the merrier,” I giggled and sat up.

          “So, I’m assuming things with Ryan are going smoothly,” Meg smirked into her beer.

          “At this point, I don’t think there’s much that could make either of us stumble so to speak,” I shrugged and watched Ryan dunk Gavin under the water.

          “Yeah, you did kinda jump all those hurdles immediately,” Lindsay snickered.

          “Does he still do the ‘only for you’ thing?” Meg continued.

          “Occasionally,” I smiled. “Anymore if I call him soft, he gets… rough.”

          “So things have finally settled into place?” Lindsay asked.

          “You could say that,” I sighed as Ryan surfaced from where Michael had dunked him in retaliation and my lips twitched as he ran his hands through his hair and let out a deep belly laugh that made my toes curl.

          “He’s got you good Brie,” Meg whispered. “Good enough that I _bet_ you’ve been thinking of the long term.”

          “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I muttered into my soda, grateful that Ryan wasn’t close enough to overhear.

          “Don’t be embarrassed,” Lindsay said sweetly, her teasing tone disappearing. “I thought about marrying Michael, like, six months after we started dating.”

          “I want to,” I sighed and sank into the water as I closed my eyes again. “But even with him being okay with our relationship, I can’t help but worry when I consider dropping hints. Our relationship started with people pushing him before he was ready, and it almost ended in catastrophe. I don’t want to push him and ruin this.”

          “Oh sweetie,” Meg cooed and gave me a half hug. “I know you can’t help your anxiety, but I really don’t think that’s something you need to worry about. You’ve been through so much already. If he was going to get overwhelmed by your relationship, he would have ran off by now.”

          “Yeah,” Lindsay said as she bumped my shoulder. “He’s in for the long haul too. Getting hitched just hasn’t crossed his mind. You already live together, Edgar might as well be your step-son, I’d bet good money that you have a joint bank account. You’re already married in every way but legally.”

          “True,” I smiled and shrugged. “I might bring it up, but for now I think we’re both more than happy where we are now. I think we both could use a few more months of normal life.”

          “I’d hardly call your life normal,” Meg giggled.

          “It’s normal for us,” I smiled.

          That’s when a cold droplet of water splashed across my face. I gasped at the temperature and my eyes shot open to see Ryan hovering over me. His smug smile grew as he watched my momentary embarrassment get suppressed into a flat, normally content smile.

          “How long have you been standing there?” I asked smoothly, and the two women flanking me were trying to hide their laughter.

          “Long enough,” he said simply as his eyes roamed my exposed neck.

          “Long enough to…?”

          “Long enough to hear Lindsay call Edgar your step-son.”

          I sighed and sank into the water.

          “Ah-ah-ah,” Ryan teased as he grabbed either side of my head and pulled me back up to look at him. “You don’t get to hide from this. I want to watch you squirm a little bit. It’s been a while since I’ve had this kind of leverage over you.”

          As if picking up on Ryan’s hints, the two ladies made a hasty retreat and I was left with Ryan as he took Meg’s place beside me. I let the blush take over my face as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to his side. He took my drink and set it aside so that I could cuddle up to him properly. I sighed and laid my head on his shoulder. We stayed that way for a long time, long enough that I thought I could fall asleep.

          “You’re right,” he said quietly.

          “About?”

          “I’m happy where we are right now.”

          I lifted my head to rest my chin on his chest so that I could look up at him. He looked beyond happy and more relaxed than I had ever seen him. Even while he was sleeping. He took a deep breath before looking down at me and the adoration in his eyes took my breath away.

          “That’s not to say I haven’t thought about it too, but not yet. There’s no need to rush into it and Lindsay is right too. The only thing that would change is a last name.”

          “I love you more than anything,” he smiled and pressed a chaste kiss to my forehead.

          “I love you too,” I sighed and hugged him tight.

          We held each other like that for a long time and he started to draw idle circles on my shoulder as we each got lost in thought. I was about to get up and get another drink when Ryan sighed heavily.

          “What?” I smiled as I pulled away and saw his cheeks were red.

          “I like the sound of it,” he said almost indignantly.

          “Sound of what?” I giggled.

          “Brie Haywood,” he muttered under his breath and looked away.

          “Don’t worry Vagabond,” I grinned and kissed his flushed cheek. “Your secret is safe with me. I promise I won’t tell anyone that you’ve got wedding fever.”

          His entire demeanor shifted and the look he gave me was dangerous and the smirk that spread across his face made my heart stop. He started to shift, matching my movements as I stood up. I cautiously stepped away and held myself low, ready to run.

          “Ryan?” I asked slowly.

          A wicked grin spread across his face and without a second thought I took off in the opposite direction.

          “Hey! No running by the pool!” Geoff shouted playfully.

          I tried to weave in and out of things to evade Ryan, but he knew me too well and soon I felt his hands grab my waist. I squealed with laughter as he lifted me up and over his shoulder.

          “It better be safe with you,” He hissed as he strode towards the pool. “Or you’ll have to face the wrath of Vagabond, something I don’t think you fear enough anymore.”

          I wanted to plead and beg like I’m sure he wanted me to, but all I could do was laugh as the pool got closer and his hands shifted to lift me up. I clutched at his arms as he stood over the edge of the deep end.

          “You need to be reminded why people fear Vagabond,” he growled playfully.

          “H-h-have mercy on me,” I managed to choke out through my laughter.

          “Vagabond? Have mercy?” Ryan continued as he braced himself. “Those words don’t even belong in the same sentence.”

          My giggles turned into a momentary scream as he threw me into the pool. I shot back up to the surface as my hot tub heated skin freaked out at the sudden temperature change. My hands found the edge and I hauled myself out of the water and gasped through residual laughter. When I opened my eyes, Ryan was still standing over me with a triumphant smile and eyes so full of love I could never fear Vagabond.

          No matter how hard he tried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so it comes to an end... This was the first big fic that I started and one of the first period, and I couldn't have imagined that I would come this far. I didn't think anyone would read it, and I certainly didn't expect all the warm and supportive comments that I've gotten. I'm so glad I could share this with all of you!
> 
> Don't get too upset though! I've got a few little fics on the back burner, I'm starting to rework the ending of My King, and I have a few longer fics that are starting to come into shape. I hope to see you all there, and thank you again for joining me on this adventure!


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